2233: Deez Nuts

Show Notes

• — Our Little Secret: Lecy Goranson, the best Becky from Roseanne, is in studio
• — Co-operation: Becky is in a web series about a group of tenants in a Manhattan apartment building
• — Da Beers: Lecy won her first-ever season of fantasy football, but came in dead last the following year. Jeremiah Ratliff, formerly of Lecy’s beloved Chicago Bears, is suspended for the first 3 games of the season after being charged with DWI.
• — Free Tom Brady: During a recent ‘tour’ of New England, Lecy was surprised to see how many Tom Brady supporters lived there. In her obituary, a New Hampshire woman requested donations to pay for Brady's legal fees and fines in lieu of flowers.
• — I’m Sorry I’m Not Sorry: Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker James Harrison forced his children, of whom he is very proud, to return their school athletics participation trophies
• — Team Jewel: Michael Jordan won an $8,900,000 lawsuit (for charity) against a now-defunct grocery chain that used his image to offer $2 discount coupons on steak in 2009, which ended up being used by just 2 people
• — Deez Nuts 2016: Under a nom de plume, a 15-year-old boy from Iowa has entered the 2016 presidential race as an independent candidate, and he’s doing very well. Jeb Bush’s campaign released a flyer featuring a picture of Jeb with a black left hand.
• — That’s So Dark: Morgan Freeman’s step-granddaughter was stabbed to death by her boyfriend, who was trying to perform a drug-induced exorcism on her
• — Tit For Tat: After NYC mayor Bill de Blasio and police commissioner Bill Bratton started a task force to combat nude body-painted women in Times Square, a hundred topless women (and hundreds of clothed supporters) marched through the city in protest
• — 37,000,000 Weddings And 2 Funerals: At least 2 of the 37,000,000 people who were outed in the Ashley Madison hack committed suicide following the announcement
• — Smells Like Trouble: Mel Gibson is being investigated for verbally and physically attacking a female paparazzo. Lecy, who left Hollywood because of the constant paparazzi harassment, explains her paparazzi disdain.
• — KKK-Ray: A Ku Klux Klan member is the first person to be arrested for trying to acquire a radiation weapon for mass destruction after planning to use x-ray radiation specifically to kill Muslims