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i think this one might trump my other lame ones...
we were at a bar one night getting all belligerent, and some dude standing outside the patio started talking shit to some girl (i think he was her ex or some shit) anyway the whole patio started picking on this guy. it was actually kind of pathetic, she was telling everyone he had a small dick and what not... so being the good guy that i am, i threw my cigarette at his shirt and spat on him. lol, for no fucking reason either... it was like i was finding a way to make the situation worse. he then asked me 'why did u do that?' and i said 'bc you touch yourself at night' or something equally random.
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