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Old 08-21-2008, 05:54 AM   #19 (permalink)
lizsquiz
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: San Francisco Bay Area, CA
Posts: 941
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Here's my solution for the old woman with the dog who's annoying and door slamming issue:
Call the bitch up claiming to be the chick's gynaecologist, saying she is pregnant and that she was too embarrassed to confront her directly, but that her unborn child seems to be extremely allergic to dogs (highly rare in-utero) and the pregnancy is therefore progressing very dangerously and slowly. So, as her physician, it would be beneficial to the chick's health if she could do her best to keep the dog away from her, and as she needs to get lots of rest in her condition, if she could make an effort to be as quiet as possible e.g. with doors in her apartment, for the sake of the baby. Given the baby;s problems, it's growing very small and slowly so she won't need to look preggo. And then when she doesn't have a baby, the woman will assume it's her fault for being noisy and having a shit of a dog.
The chick doesn't have to say anything at all, under the guise that a) she's too embarrassed and timid to be confronting to her lovely neighbout and b) she doesn't want to announce the pregnancy in case something goes wrong because of everything.
Problem the fuck solved
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