Quote:
Originally Posted by BrownEyedBtch
Marina, please write a book. I'd buy a babillion copies.
I have a question. I have a longtime friend, a guy, who I'd lost touch with for a while. A couple of years ago, he randomly emailed me to say hello. I never thought he'd remember me, but he did. Over the last couple of years, we'd been in and out of touch, due mostly to schedules and living in 2 different states. I saw him in June for the first time in years, and we were both pretty nervous. In our communication, it's pretty obvious we have something special, even though we have never really come out and said anything. He's living in Italy for the next 2 years pursuing a master's degree, so there's nothing to pursue right now anyway. My question is, is it worth it to take the risk and come out with how I feel, hoping his reciprocation is there, or do I just let the friendship play out, knowing it's not a friendship I want to lose? Just being friends means I will never know, but going for it means I know but I also lose my friend.
Love you!
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Thanks, I love that this thread seems to have a renaissance just whenever I need it to.
As for your boy, there are usually time in every relationship where something has to be said, whether it's "I like you" or "I'm sorry I broke your mom's gravy boat." In my experience, there is a vaguely perceptible hum in my stomach region that tell me what the right time is.
Personally, I like to do things at their earliest opportunity because I'm impatient and loud-mouthed. Sometimes this works out in my favor, sometimes it doesn't, but usually I'm okay enough with the outcome that I'll take the same course of action pretty much every time.
If I were in your shoes, I'd tell him how I felt. The friendship is valuable to you, and I know you don't want to ruin it, but good friendships are resilient, and if it's not, there's a world of other people out there to be friends with.
Chances on a relationship blossoming right now, or across the world are pretty slim, but at least he can go to Italy with full knowledge of how you feel, and hopefully you can know how he feels as well.
A lot can happen in 2 years, but it's actually not that long in the course of human life. My advice is that if he does feel the same way about you, don't try to enforce fidelity for either party while he's away. If it works out in the long run, it works out and that's great, but there are so many other people and things and adventures in the world, that if it doesn't work out, you know something else will. Just because he's the brightest thing on the radar right now doesn't mean he's the only thing.