Quote:
Originally Posted by Blitzgal
Nothing is crazier than a duck dick. The females get gang banged, so over time they've developed this bizarre, circuitous vaginal tract. And in response, the males have developed corkscrew dicks.
Unraveling the Mysteries of Duck Mating |
don't start the duck mating comments again or Cretatious Bob will go ape shit. About a month ago there were pages and PAGES on animal sex ; )
Duck penises are craaaazy looking!
There are so many fascinating sperm facts, I think the cheating one is the best. I also like that the sperm that makes guys swims faster but the sperm that makes girls has a longer shelf life. And that sperm from different males actually fight each other in utero.
Also, I know the prolapsed anus stories are gross (and I actually looked up pictures...big mistake) but hemorroids suck. And I hate talking about poo, but here are two suggestions to keep the pain down and your ass hole staying in your body.
1) the torpedo - take a super absorbant overnight maxi pad and fill it with water. freeze it. then take tucks pads or other soothing wipes (it just needs witchhazel in it) and lay them along the pad overlapping slightly. Put that where it hurts and sit on it. The pain relief is amazing. I used this after having babies, it rocks.
2) if you're a pusher and the poo is a tough one, take two fingers and gently apply pressure to the taint (or perineum if you want to get medical). It is gross when you think about it, but relieves a lot of pressure and helps things go more smoothly and less painful. Once again, a saving grace for me after having babies. Doctors say the first poo after babies is almost as painful as giving birth...so you have to stop being grossed out and just find practical solutions and be ok with buying stool softeners at Target
I would never EVER have written such gross advice in a public forum, but Chemda's poo advice was golden for me, so hopefully I can help out someone else from losing their asshole in the toilet.