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Old 07-18-2013, 10:39 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Brooklyn, Boston, other.
Posts: 880
Originally Posted by BrianAlt View Post
It depends on the person I'm discussing it with. One good friend? Probably not. A therapist? I'd say no. Another woman? Probably. At least in my wife's opinion. And hers counts a lot here.
That makes sense. Do you agree with your wife's opinion? (If you feel comfortable answering.)
Obviously I can imagine a scenario in which a straight man is discussing his sexual relationship with another woman who is not his wife, and having that be inappropriate if the other woman is interested in the man, say (and/or the man in the woman).
But what about a situation wherein neither the man nor the other woman are interested at all, she is otherwise involved, or a member of another sexual orientation, whatever the case, absolutely no threat to the relationship, only interested in helping... I can understand the wife (or husband, for that matter, were the roles reversed) wanting rules in place that err on the side of keeping that potential threat at bay, but what if that threat is entirely absent? Are those rules still important because she (or he) feels they are? Do you think (a la When Harry Met Sally) that the threat is never entirely absent?

Again, no need to answer specifically if you don't want to.

By the way, I've been married 22 years. I don't say that to prove I know more. It's so you can say congratulations to me.
And I'll say, you certainly know more about YOUR marriage than I do. And if you're happy in it, then you win. Or more happy than unhappy, certainly.

My best friend is single and never married. I have discussed certain sexual aspects with him, but not many. Few guy friends I've had have been comfortable on that level. Women seem more open to it, but I point back to my answer above.
When you say the guy friends aren't comfortable, can I ask what that means? You start to talk about something sexual and they say "ew, gross, that's your wife?"

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