Hmm, good questions.
Ok first I wouldn't say my father made constant threats. He just let me know point blank that they would not condone be getting pregnant considering I was then at the age I realized my father had paid for, at a minimum, no less than 5 abortions for my half sister (and then she had 2 kids while my bro had 5...all before i graduated high school. they are at least 10 years older than me). I did not live with my siblings and back then I had no idea bout her drug abuse. I also grew up in the 70s/80s. My parents weren't my friends, they were my parents so back them, I still had enough fear of my dad to know this is the one thing he wasn't playing around about. They just raised me to wait til I get married to have kids, I know that sounds crazy huh? Back then its not like there were tons of girls with kids in school or considered acceptable (I'm only 35).
I was raised as an only child. I had my own tv, I had cable, I was mature. I don't really recall having the sex talk with my parents until after I asked them for birth control. Also, my parents did not know about the rape until after I was married, so they thought i was just being responsible with my first boyfriend. If I'm being honest, I think it was the rape that did it. After being violated in your own house, room, and bed by someone you trusted there was no way in hell I was not going to control my body. Perhaps I did hear and retain things about my sister, but at the time i was 12-14ish in an age when abortions weren't as freely talked about, but eventually i kind of figured it out. Damn now I feel old.
I would say its a combo of having parents who were not my friends, a little bit of fear, being raised to get married FIRST, then have kids, as well as my sister on some level. But more than anything, it was my dad. My dad was not my friend until after I got married and I think more parents need to go back to old school parenting regarding some things like sex (also, my parents are still married, going on 36 years). No girl really wants to go home and tell her dad his baby is knocked up and my dad simply let me know he didn't play that shit. I always knew he loved me, I was his baby and my moms only child, and I was spoiled rotten - but I knew that me getting preggo was basically a dealbreaker. That is what I hope you get express to your daughter on some level- you love her but she should be responsible enough to make sure SHE does not get pregnant & do not depend on the guy for protection if she is "responsible" enough to have sex. And Dad sure as hell ain't going to be raising no grandbabies. I love my father even more for being a father and not my friend. I think this is the first time I ever actually admitted it, but its true. that's why your post hit a nerve.
No, no intimacy issues as a result. I was in two long term relationships after the rape, lots of fucking in between, and then with my husband since 21...lawd knows I'm DTF. And my husband shares similar old school values like me as well which is rare for a Dominican because you know how fertile those fuckers are
