[Sparrow]

my parents and i get along great! my Mama is an understanding human person and even when she disagrees with the things i do, she loves me anyway and supports my being happy. she doesn't judge me and it's why i can be so open about my life with her. she's not meddlesome and keeps secrets like a boss. i know i'm lucky.

on a less fun topic, my Mamaw died of her dementia this summer. it was a slow downhill ride until one day it turned into a cliff and she dropped off it--unusual for the condition and in the end a merciful quickness. she needed more and more daily care. she fell a lot. lost track of things to where my Dad had to take on her financial and legal affairs. i saw her one morning, ambulatory and while not sure who everyone was, could respond to commands and answer questions. by the afternoon she was bedridden and losing her mind. the terminal stage was disturbing to say the least. she started talking and didn't stop, literally all day and all night, talking for three solid days. the hallucinations were intense. she became combative. i got into her line of sight wiping her face and i think i may have turned into the devil, whom she had been conversing with a lot, and she sat up straight for the first time since going down and took a punch at me.

Keith is right. they become children. i've changed my naked Mamaw's diaper. bathed her. changed her into and out of her clothes. fed her. held her hand while she giggled and babbled into the air. as hard as it was on everyone, there's not a moment i'd take back being there for her the way she was there for us kids. it's what Love does.

i don't mean to throw a big scary story out there, especially since Mamaw had something of an atypical experience that even had the doctors raising a confused eyebrow, but having been through it, it might be a good time to get together with your siblings and start thinking about who can be around, what kinds and level of care might be advantageous, what resources are available in their area (shout out to the Angels at Meals on Wheels), what her wishes are regarding her care if she loses her ability to communicate it. you want to plan now. dementia can get weird.