Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord of the Cock Rings
So, how'd it go D-Rex?
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I just spotted this. I got here with my lifelong friend, Ben. Found an apartment in South Colorado Springs, got a job, smoked a shit load of weed. I made a new friend that feels like a brother, upping my count to 2 in the state. Ben moved to go back to college. I moved in with my new friend, he had a full second floor living space. Kitchen, laundry, bath, two bedroom.
The main point is things got progressively better. Until I began to absolutely lose the only control I had mentally. My whole life I've had a problem with anger. Never in a way that had been externalized exactly. I guess people didn't really get to see or hear it. I realized later in life that the way people may cut themselves as a release I did by beating myself. I would punch my legs and chest until I could feel it going numb, I could hide those. I grew up in rural town that could rival Keith's for the nothing award. Though we did have a lake. Anyway, I would find it easy when alone to scream at myself about everything wrong with me until my throat was throbbing. KATG comes in around that time. But once in Colorado I was 21 and things were getting more public. I had outbursts that I'm amazed I wasn't fired for. I worked at an ACE hardware and was very qualified, but a fucking asshole. I'm not proud or happy about that. I was losing control of what was rising under the surface. at 22 I've moved to my friends basement apartment. A girlfriend I had from Missouri was still talking to me. She came to visit and we got together again. In 2016 we got a house together. Before the house, and after, I was not good. My brother (actual brother, but if I was choosing family I would still pick him) moved in with my girlfriend and me. He ended up getting a job that paid well, great benefits, and he claimed his boss was awesome. Between my brother and girlfriend I started to get mental help. I slowly tried different medications and went to therapy. I was finally diagnosed as Bi-Polar in 2018. In 2017 My brother was also going back to college and had recommended me for his position at his job. I got the job and he was correct. His (now my) boss is awesome. I don't just consider him a friend. I consider him a friend, mentor, and safe place. He was just as important to me getting better as my girlfriend and brother.
2018 was a good year for me. My meds have been figured out, my family is my priority, I have two puppies, a great job, and I'm happy.
I also (finally) have been catching up on Keith and The Girl. In 2016 I really began to lose all of who I am. I didn't sponsor the 2016, 2017, or 2018 marathons. That's something that pains me more than I can properly describe still. This show and this community is a part of my upbringing. I began listening in 2008 and I feel like it's important to remember that KATG helped me alone as a kid. It can help me not alone as an adult all the same.
Thanks for asking Lord of the Cock Rings, (lol)
Dave Rex