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4-Stars.
I deducted a star for being in suburban NJ.
I love hosting people... I only want a bigger house so I can have a big guest suite for people and entertain more.
Why staying at my house is awesome:
1. I'll make sure there's a variety of snacks, from salty to sweet, crunchy to soft, hot or cold - your cravings will be met.
2. I will offer you weed.
3. Low-pressure hang - no need to feel "on" at all. Wanna watch movies? Scroll on your phone? Read? Sit outside and look at stars? I'm down for that. (Wanna go out on the town? See reason for deducting one star)
4. You can feed the deer outside. I have a cool swinging egg chair on my patio.
5. You want to buy ME dinner? You shouldn't have. There are plenty of good restaurants to go to, or if we are staying home and getting stoned, there is plenty to choose from on delivery apps.
6. I have a guest bathroom and like putting out nice products for my friends to try. (BFF raved just this past weekend "I love staying at your house, I always get to try neat skincare products.")
7. My humblebrag? Spend a bunch of time cleaning and making things perfect, then apologizing for "the mess" when guests arrive as if it doesn't smell like sunkissed linen and I wasn't scrubbing the baseboards.
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