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-   -   1416: Straight from the Tap (https://www.keithandthegirl.com/forums/f5/1416-straight-tap-16458/)

Keith 06-28-2011 05:44 PM

1416: Straight from the Tap
 
"You ready for today's, uh... prolapsed anus story?"


Costaki Economopoulos — The biggest name in comedy

tandrew6655 06-28-2011 09:42 PM

Guts
 
Speaking of prolapsed anus, here is a story written by the author of Fight Club.

PLEASE BE WARNED THIS STORY IS VERY GRAPHIC!
http://www.seizureandy.com/stuff/guts.html

PsychoLoco 06-29-2011 04:49 AM

Costaki was referring to the shape of a human penis. It may be an old theory, but a recent book entitled "Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality" talks about it. The book talks about how in primates there are 2 types of male-female relationships. One is where the size of the male (being twice the size of females and bigger than all other males) ensures no other males can compete for females (i.e. gorillas). The other is where males and females are roughly the same size (i.e. humans), so other means for the males to ensure paternity are used. Gibbons are monogamous. Some apes' semen forms a plug to block other sperm. Humans evolved a uniquely shaped penis:
"Chapter 17 - The unusual flared glans of the human penis forming the coronal ridge, combined with the repeated thrusting action characteristic of human intercourse—ranging anywhere from ten to five hundred thrusts per romantic interlude—creates a vacuum in the female’s reproductive tract. This vacuum pulls any previously deposited semen away from the ovum, thus aiding the sperm about to be sent into action. But wouldn’t this vacuum action also draw away a man’s own sperm? No, because upon ejaculation, the head of the penis shrinks in size before any loss of tumescence (stiffness) in the shaft, thus neutralizing the suction that might have pulled his own boys back. Very clever."
Sadly, I'm sure 10 thrusts is more than many guys can last, but humans are still the love machines of the ape world:
"It bears repeating that the human penis is the longest and thickest of any primate’s—in both absolute and relative terms. And despite all the bad press they get, men last far longer in the saddle than bonobos (fifteen seconds), chimps (seven seconds), or gorillas (sixty seconds), clocking in between four and seven minutes, on average."

Blitzgal 06-29-2011 06:37 AM

Nothing is crazier than a duck dick. The females get gang banged, so over time they've developed this bizarre, circuitous vaginal tract. And in response, the males have developed corkscrew dicks.

Unraveling the Mysteries of Duck Mating

unohisname 06-29-2011 06:49 AM

Keith didnt qoute me right. I mean i dont get how anyone can vote for the attitude over the rat. I think the rat is so much worst. And yes their are few rats out to sea. And yes i do hate them lol.

Keith 06-29-2011 07:08 AM

I quoted you exactly. You actually say this stuff.

unohisname 06-29-2011 07:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keith (Post 704978)
I quoted you exactly. You actually say this stuff.

Ok keith maybe. I didnt say it right. But now u know what i meant. I will proof ready better next time

Jonny Face 06-29-2011 07:26 AM

There is a kati roll place in london,I went there to eat once and the staff were very rude.I do remember the food being very nice though.Weird!

Edit:I just looked online and it's the same company in new York and london

dEadERest 06-29-2011 07:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unohisname (Post 704980)
I will proof ready better next time

you're doing fine, proof readying is over-rated

Keith 06-29-2011 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unohisname (Post 704980)
Ok keith maybe.

It'd be pretty easy to find out.


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