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View Poll Results: Is Juan's marriage over?
Yes 36 97.30%
No 1 2.70%
Voters: 37. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 01-28-2014, 11:04 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Juan, baby, why you so quiet?

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Old 01-31-2014, 01:43 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Hey

Hi there:
I've heard the episode and I think I need to have a few things clarified, I've listed them as I heard the questions on the episode.

1)I'm from Mexico, things are not going well there, education is shitty, crime rate is very high
moving to a more "secure" place, so my son an wife have a better life seem like a good opportunity for us.

2)We bought a house in Mexico, Seattle called the first time, so we sold everything rent our house (the one we just bought) and were ready to go

3)After a while the Seattle opportunity went cold, so we got a new place (rented one, since our was already occupied) I got a new job (since I quit my old one, so did she) Sexual therapy part.

4)English not my first language, not in a good place to write, I apologize

5) I can live in Seattle by myself, living in a company's apartment sharing it with 3 others. We decided I should come first mostly because of our past experience , what if the job was not what I expect? so does life in the US?

6)I work as an IT contractor.My contract is very strict, if I quit I'm liable for future payments, marketing and moving expenses (so it says there), we can go to trial, my visa is suspended, etc. If I get fired I get out of the contract automatically.

7)I can get an apartment after I get my first paycheck ( I get it monthly) and the first one didn't have all 30 days

8)Money wise is 3 times what I was making a year in Mexico, and it's sufficient to live a good life here in the US (money is important but in the long run, living in Mexico is getting worse)

9) In her defense... It's been like 6 months of not working for her, she really liked her job, tried to be relocated to the US, didn't happen. She quit because I was leaving shortly (the first time Seattle called) but it didn't happen, and we crashed at her sister's house (because we were leaving right?), then we crashed at her aunt's house (why rent an apartment? I'm leaving...) we were "homeless" in a way for 5 months. Living out of our savings. We rent a new place and I'm leaving again...? a lot of changes we go trough and all because an "idea" of a better life?. Plus Every time I call is to talk about who's our son, how are things going... all planned nothing spontaneous. "we are stuck in daily routine" she told me. "I want you to make me fall in love with you again"

10)Part of therapy was working on our communication skills, so I've learned to say what I have in mind clearly (Spanish) and as a part of the long distance relationship deal was to say the things that bother us, the things we feel say them to one another because so far away we don't "perceive" things that maybe being there we could.

11) I was so mad when we fought, I didn't think it through, and next day was Family day and going back home (for a day at least) so I couldn't find the time to talk to her

12) Been in Seattle for a month

13) good analogy Keith

glad to make the poll
Keith and BrianAlt like this.
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Old 01-31-2014, 07:50 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Robinmx View Post
"we are stuck in daily routine" she told me. "I want you to make me fall in love with you again"
firstly, it may very well be that you're stuck in a routine. it happens; it always sucks. way to see something, say something! nobody read minds.

does her request come with /her/ making you fall in love with /her/ again? i hear her; she wants to feel special, she wants romance. we all do, it's fun! it's also a two way street. if i'm after a little special, my go to is to perform a little special. it gives my partner permission and impetus to reciprocate.

somebody has to go first, is the thing, and the other person needs to pay back in kind for that romance ball to get rolling. i can be as simple as a little 'i love you' post it on the bathroom mirror. then it's their turn.
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