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Michael's Servant 03-13-2015 01:46 AM

2146: Welcome to Bollyweird
 
with Anuvab Pal – India; foreign currency; Bollywood; Indian stand-up; India’s lack of equality; Apple’s forced apps; Hillary Clinton’s lies and email scandal; drunk driving Secret Service; Blurred Lines pays $7.4 million to Marvin Gaye; Taylor Swift’s $40 million legs; Keith’s fat-shaming campaign

Guest:
Anuvab Pal
http://static-1.keithandthegirl.net/...al-100x100.jpg


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Sparrow 03-13-2015 07:16 AM

Anuvab was /so/ /great/. Keith went ignorant for a while and that is always the height of hilarity. Anuvab really rolled with it. good show, good show, good show.

thirteen 03-13-2015 09:44 AM

Great, easy-going guest.

Kaila603 03-13-2015 11:54 AM

Skinny Bitch, Here.
 
I swim in the summer but that's it. Where's the option for skinny bitch that eats like shit and doesn't work out?

FingerLakes 03-13-2015 12:16 PM

When those dudes grab your lap in the theaters, it not cuz they're fat. they're just trying to give you a handjob. Maybe stop taking your dick out when you watch Transformers Keith?

Anuvab was a blast

Keith 03-13-2015 02:12 PM

You're making a joke, but it's funny you picked that movie...

Thumbnail 03-13-2015 04:45 PM

I too was turning into a fat fuck over the last few years and having a child was exactly what made me stop overeating. They mimic everything and I'm not about to tell him that being fat is ok (aside from the pituituituituitui gland issues). In fact I want to make this a non issue, eating healthy is the default.

So last August me and my husband went on a diet: vegetable soup or a salad before every meal, waaaaay more salad than meat and no carbs after lunch, cut back on sugar, read labels at the grocery store, carry my own mid morning/ afternoon snacks. It was tough at first, we felt we were always hungry and had to fight it with some tricks (fruit + non fat yogurt, some chia seeds, etc.). In the end I've reached my goal and lost 25lb (I was never obese but I'm short and those 5/ 10 lb wouldn't go away!). My husband lost 20lb and needs to lose some more.

Thing is - and that's why I too firmly believe that most fat people are not sick, they just overeat - my mother in law is constantly on a diet and she never loses weight because she lacks the discipline. My husband and his brother are both nervous eaters. My parents always taught me to eat what you need; when we first started dating he was shocked at how small the portions were at my home and I was appalled at his mom's huge trays of food.

So yes, I believe example is key but we can't put aside factors like exposure to shitty food (and we're bombarded by ads and bright lights). And the pituituititty gland, that bitch.

Dean from Australia 03-13-2015 05:41 PM

I've switched over to adult ICU Nursing in the past couple of years and one of my biggest peevs is the amount of fat people having orthopedic surgery - hip replacements, knee replacements - basically because they have become so fat, their joints have crapped out.

Actually, I am sick and tired of these fat fucks. They get these joint replacements done without any thought to addressing the issues that caused them to land in hospital in the first place.

They are a prick to look after, are a risk to staff - particularly from a manual handling and safety perspective - & their outcomes are not so great. They often end up having multiple surgeries and yet they remain the fat fucks they've always been.

Fat people should be banned from surgery until they lose a significant amount of weight.

Keith 03-13-2015 06:30 PM

Dean, I hope all your patients die.

WHOA! WHAT'D I SAY?! I NEED TO WORRY IF YOU'RE OFFENSED?! - Steve Fry

WSEIII 03-13-2015 08:56 PM

great show

Dolly Parton's rack is real that's an act of God.

GreeningOA 03-13-2015 09:11 PM

Nothing here applies ... How about "high metabolism"

Dean from Australia 03-13-2015 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keith (Post 840484)
Dean, I hope all your patients die.

WHOA! WHAT'D I SAY?! I NEED TO WORRY IF YOU'RE OFFENSED?! - Steve Fry

I'll be offended if that was a typo...

Keith 03-13-2015 09:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dean from Australia (Post 840490)
I'll be offended if that was a typo...

You meant "I'D be offended if..."

Luckily sometimes 'ol Steve-o is a stuttering prick also.

Dean from Australia 03-13-2015 09:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keith (Post 840492)
You meant "I'D be offended if..."

Luckily sometimes 'ol Steve-o is a stuttering prick also.

FUCK!

Cut me some slack Keith - I've just come off nights.

Keith 03-13-2015 09:39 PM

... and that's why they'll all die.

#WHAT'DISAY?!

Enunciated Piffle 03-13-2015 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kaila603 (Post 840473)
I swim in the summer but that's it. Where's the option for skinny bitch that eats like shit and doesn't work out?

...so add bulimia to the poll???

invader 03-13-2015 10:17 PM

About the poll...
 
We can only choose one? I'm taking swimming lessons at the moment so I guess that.

Fat shaming only works if you are ashamed of being fat to begin with. I know a lot of big girls who are super sexy, fine with the way they look and as a result don't get upset when they hear people talk negatively about weight. But I sort of have thing for thick women #blackguyissues.

Keith 03-13-2015 10:34 PM

Just between us, you can lose a few.

Keith 03-13-2015 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kaila603 (Post 840473)
I swim in the summer but that's it. Where's the option for skinny bitch that eats like shit and doesn't work out?

We put yous under Salads. We had 'Natural' for a second but we had to keep the number of options the same as for fatsos.

I regret we didn't put the option EVERYONE HATES ME.

Too literally little too late, pretty pretty.

robotparker 03-13-2015 11:52 PM

I have this weird gift where I can eat as much as I want and it doesn't seem to affect the shape of my body at all. I'm 32, 5'7", and I don't think I've ever weighed more than 130 pounds. I never realized how lucky I was a 20-something until I got older and all of my friends started getting heavy and talking about calories (whatever the fuck those are!).

Here's my diet if you're curious:

- For breakfast: sugary energy bars and coffee with loads of flavored creamer
- At least a gallon of sweet tea throughout the day
- Lunch options: burritos, quesadillas, and nachos (I get them free from my job!)
- Dinner options: canned chili, frozen pizzas, and/or microwaved pot pies
- On fridays, I like to treat myself to a pint of Ben and Jerry's and a Bertolli's Meal For Two (eaten solo of course)
- Random milkshakes peppered throughout the week

And for exercise: drive everywhere and ask for help if you need to lift something. Try it!

Keith 03-13-2015 11:57 PM

"Random milkshake peppered..."

WHAT CAN I TELL YOU?! I EAT CONSTANTLY!!!

The Girl 03-14-2015 04:53 AM

I hope you get checked out and don't just assume that because you're skinny these foods are not affecting you very negatively.

invader 03-14-2015 06:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keith (Post 840500)
Just between us, you can lose a few.

Couldn't we all?

Keith 03-14-2015 07:30 AM

Sure.

Right, buddy?

robotparker 03-14-2015 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Girl (Post 840507)
I hope you get checked out and don't just assume that because you're skinny these foods are not affecting you very negatively.

I actually had my once-a-year Obamacare wellness check some months back and everything seems to be hunky-dory. I figured I would at least have some blood pressure issues. I remember saying, "what? really?" when my GP said it was "perfect." But even I gotta admit there's no way I can drink this much sweet tea and not be hurting myself somehow. I'm sure one day I'll wake up with some new kind of diabetes that the word has never seen before. But until then: You Only YOLO Once!

lalalemon 03-15-2015 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by robotparker (Post 840504)
I have this weird gift where I can eat as much as I want and it doesn't seem to affect the shape of my body at all. I'm 32, 5'7", and I don't think I've ever weighed more than 130 pounds. I never realized how lucky I was a 20-something until I got older and all of my friends started getting heavy and talking about calories (whatever the fuck those are!).

Here's my diet if you're curious:

- For breakfast: sugary energy bars and coffee with loads of flavored creamer
- At least a gallon of sweet tea throughout the day
- Lunch options: burritos, quesadillas, and nachos (I get them free from my job!)
- Dinner options: canned chili, frozen pizzas, and/or microwaved pot pies
- On fridays, I like to treat myself to a pint of Ben and Jerry's and a Bertolli's Meal For Two (eaten solo of course)
- Random milkshakes peppered throughout the week

And for exercise: drive everywhere and ask for help if you need to lift something. Try it!

You're insides are rotting.

And you are probably a great example of the "skinny-fat" phenomenon.

Mattman 03-15-2015 11:33 PM

Keith, your incredulity towards other countries and your inability to understand foreign exchange rates are very funny, for a guy who has traveled outside of America occasionally. I wasn't sure if you were hamming it up, when you told your guest that his country of 1 billion people should just divide their currency by something to make it a USDollar.

If this is your approach to India, Vietnam would figuratively make your head explode. Quite the opposite to when America last visited Vietnam in great numbers, where the head explosion-thing was literal.

While we do not have any religion or custom - based behaviors that would stretch your comprehension, like animal reverence or death/imprisonment for public shows of affection, this place would be SO off your scope. USA it is not.
  • The currency - the Dong - is 21,500 to 1 USD. So a trip to the supermarket to buy $50 of groceries would be over 1 million Dong. (snigger "he said Dong")
  • All animals can be eaten.
  • Public urination is commonplace and nose-picking seems almost compulsory.
  • Saigon, a city built for 1/2 million people, now has 18 million people and over 12 million motorbikes. All motorbikes appear to move in random direction. Population of Vietnam is 90 million, the majority of whom are rural.
  • The language, although it uses western letters, is almost impossible for westerners to speak.

Most expats who live here love it, so despite the short-list above, it has a lot to commend it. There is almost no "inner-city" crime, although bag-snatching is becoming common, the climate is pretty good - warm to hot, all year round and the people are very friendly. There are beautiful beaches, wonderful countryside and interesting cultural history. Unlike some countries, the indigenous population (which is a combination of regional tribes and cultures from right across Indochina) has not been wiped out by settlers.

If any listeners are coming this way, I am happy to provide advice on where to go, in Thailand, Cambodia, Laos, Myanmar and Vietnam.

Keith 03-16-2015 12:08 AM

You're right. I have no interest.

People are very friendly during the common purse-snatching? You put that in the same sentence!

I don't love that long time.

P.S. Vietnam would probably rather you weren't their spokesperson.

John Galt 03-16-2015 05:59 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Such a good show

robotparker 03-16-2015 08:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lalalemon (Post 840561)
You're insides are rotting.

Thanks, doc!

Thumbnail 03-16-2015 08:36 AM

eheheh ehhehe eheheheh the Dong... hehehe eheheheh

Keith 03-16-2015 11:23 AM

I need help. How many dongs do you have?

devohawk 03-17-2015 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSEIII (Post 840488)
great show

Dolly Parton's rack is real that's an act of God.

A god who loves us.

Mattman 03-17-2015 09:56 PM

Are you just pleased to see me, or do you have a large wad of Dong in your pocket?

The largest denomination is 500,000 (USD22) but most ATMs give out 100,000s. So after a trip to the ATM you cannot fold your wallet any more. Good thing we do have credit and debit cards, Chemda.

Keith 03-17-2015 10:06 PM

You lost me at "Are."

U!S!A! U!S!A!

Sparky_root 03-25-2015 02:20 PM

omg - when the guest is talking about the poll choice "block of cheese" I absolutely lost it - i'm crying over here! :-D


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