Nothing here applies ... How about "high metabolism"

I'll be offended if that was a typo...

You meant "I'D be offended if..."

Luckily sometimes 'ol Steve-o is a stuttering prick also.

FUCK!

Cut me some slack Keith - I've just come off nights.

... and that's why they'll all die.

#WHAT'DISAY?!

...so add bulimia to the poll???

About the poll...
 

We can only choose one? I'm taking swimming lessons at the moment so I guess that.

Fat shaming only works if you are ashamed of being fat to begin with. I know a lot of big girls who are super sexy, fine with the way they look and as a result don't get upset when they hear people talk negatively about weight. But I sort of have thing for thick women #blackguyissues.

Just between us, you can lose a few.

We put yous under Salads. We had 'Natural' for a second but we had to keep the number of options the same as for fatsos.

I regret we didn't put the option EVERYONE HATES ME.

Too literally little too late, pretty pretty.

I have this weird gift where I can eat as much as I want and it doesn't seem to affect the shape of my body at all. I'm 32, 5'7", and I don't think I've ever weighed more than 130 pounds. I never realized how lucky I was a 20-something until I got older and all of my friends started getting heavy and talking about calories (whatever the fuck those are!).

Here's my diet if you're curious:

- For breakfast: sugary energy bars and coffee with loads of flavored creamer
- At least a gallon of sweet tea throughout the day
- Lunch options: burritos, quesadillas, and nachos (I get them free from my job!)
- Dinner options: canned chili, frozen pizzas, and/or microwaved pot pies
- On fridays, I like to treat myself to a pint of Ben and Jerry's and a Bertolli's Meal For Two (eaten solo of course)
- Random milkshakes peppered throughout the week

And for exercise: drive everywhere and ask for help if you need to lift something. Try it!