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View Poll Results: Should Chemda meet with her mother now that she's in town? | |||
Yes | 8 | 17.78% | |
No | 22 | 48.89% | |
Yes and break a plate | 15 | 33.33% | |
Voters: 45. You may not vote on this poll |
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Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
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06-13-2017, 01:03 PM | #11 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Detroit area - Michigan
Posts: 702
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YES bring a plate of cookies eat almost all of them, place a KATG business card down in front of her then break the plate and leave.
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06-13-2017, 03:51 PM | #14 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2006
Location: SF Bay Area, CA
Posts: 1,026
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I fired my dad from my life years ago...
Has helped me get better about pulling the plug on toxic relationships in the last few years... People show you who they are, it's hard to change, most people don't. If you feel compelled to "try one more time" I agree you show up fully in your truth: your husband your job your life choices She either taps into some mother instinct that might live inside her & realize you are an amazing daughter, or she might not, and that would be HER loss. |
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Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
Check out the recent shows
Click here to get Keith and The Girl free on iTunes.
Click here to get the podcast RSS feed. Click here to watch all the videos on our YouTube channel. |
06-13-2017, 09:07 PM | #15 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Hollow Bastion
Posts: 1,887
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(real answer)
she's NEVER going to give you what you want Chemda.
Either she doesn't know how or doesn't care. She isn't even going to give you a proper goodbye with all this "you'll always be my daughter. call me." She's going to dick you around, guilt you and then ignore your husband and your career and massive success. Unless the subject of the next email she sends you is "I've been to therapy and i want to apologize" stay the heck away from her. Last edited by FingerLakes; 06-13-2017 at 09:11 PM. |
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06-13-2017, 11:11 PM | #16 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Dallas, TX 5'11" 200#
Posts: 885
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Hugs.
Here it is; We love you. Your chosen family loves you, supports you, and believes in you. Your successes are truly awe-inspiring, and your bravery in the face of a 6 pound tumor is unmatchable. Over empathizing, and allowing others to take advantage of that trait, is your biggest weakness. It's not surprising that your mom is exploiting it. More hugs. |
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06-14-2017, 09:50 AM | #17 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 340
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It will be difficult, but try to become the passive member in this situation, just as you're trying to sometimes let someone else be the outing planner.
You feel terrible when you reach out to your mother and are not met with the same effort. You feel guilty when you actively cut her out of your life as toxic. Just as it's not fair for you to always have the responsibility of planning activities and destinations and contingencies, it's not fair for you to feel you always have to be the one making the decisions on the course of your relationship with your mother. Let her know that you are ready and waiting to talk. Make yourself available to her when she wants to meet you on your terms, realizing that it may be never. If she reaches out again but with the same superficiality, let her know "I guess we're not ready to talk, then." Don't agonize with "how much am I willing to accept to get things rolling again?" I know you probably will, but please try--for your own emotional well-being. |
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