2663: Dante’s Inferno

[bellalugosi]

Originally Posted by AstoriaGirl

fuck Dante. Taking care of the kids and house for 15 years is absolutely work.

Absolutely. And he tried to say the guy was taking care of the kids too.....if she's a stay at home mom she's with them more because he's working.

I can't believe people take his advice.

[bellalugosi]

Originally Posted by Apia

And not to forget, before his marriage, Keith was able to date a unicorn ( Chemda )
So maybe he should teach Dante some stuff.

And even had a successful breakup, to the point where they can remain business partners and work together every day. People should be coming to Keith and Chemda for relationship advice.

[memecherry]

Originally Posted by bellalugosi

And even had a successful breakup, to the point where they can remain business partners and work together every day. People should be coming to Keith and Chemda for relationship advice.

If only they would write a relationship book....

[Sparrow]

What Do We Do Now? is awesome.

[flerchin]

Having not listened yet, I still feel confident in my vote. Do not, under any circumstances take advice from the former pimp, current misogynist.

[Mermaid]

I'm not familiar with his past or his other times on the show.

I agree with everything he said.

I don't see it as misogynistic. Or crazy. He just as hard lines.

If a dude were going off the way the woman in the story he told were going off. I would definitely tell him to get the fuck out.

I wouldn't eat the burger tho. Cause I likely didn't want a burger and that's more energy than I'm willing to give to being petty.

The moment I notice a red flag or a flash of craziness I cut it off. I'm not interested in the argument or figuring it out. Especially if I'm just dating or fucking you. It's not worth my time or emotional energy.

People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you. Everyone doesn't have your best interest.

Pussy soap = Summer's eve feminine wash

I don't believe Chemda is a unicorn but I do believe there are a lot less people like her than she thinks.

[Mermaid]

Just got to the kid analogy.

I also completely agree.

I will tell a dude my line *once*, I don't repeat myself.

Anytime he toes the line after that. That's it for him.

Example:

Dude: *Tries to kiss/hold hands/be any form of intimate on first date*
Me: I don't feel comfortable doing that.
Dude: Come, on. Why not?
Me: I said no and I'm not going to repeat myself.
Dude: But..-
Me: Bye.

[Sparrow]

unwanted sexual advances are a little different than not perceiving that she respects that he bought her a dress enough.

i'm floored you're not grossed out by his hyper machismo and his hair trigger toward feeing disrespected and his kindergarten punishment tactics.

[Mermaid]

I don't view anything he said as machismo. As I could see him giving the same advice to women.

I am also a person who doesn't put up with disrespect. Respecting me is not up for conversation. Once I tell you that's it. After that there is an "action".

The action isn't a "punishment". It's a "I'm not going to sit here and let you treat me in a way I don't like so I'm going to nip it in the bud *now*"

My action is usually ending all contact.

I support Ole dude sitting in the airport and missing the plane to prove a point. How many times was he supposed to explain to her that being on time matters? Especially at an airport. She's a grown ass woman.

Heck, I would have left her in the airport and enjoyed my trip alone.


I think what he is saying is only getting such a negative reaction because it is coming from a man.

A woman not putting up with bullshit and disrespect. And being proactive in not allowing it in her life would be praised.

But ey, ain't gonna ever catch me feeling bad for men. They made this bed.

[Mermaid]

Originally Posted by Apia

I also think it's different if it's a person you just met or your longtime partner.
I will not leave my husband for not taking the laundry basket to the basement.

And not doing the laundry is also no solution, because I would punish myself and the kids as well.
So what do I DO?
I talk, get mad from time to time, it helps. And think about all the good things about Mr. Apia.
The way he spoke about his partners, I could sense no love or even sympathy. It was a struggle for the upper hand with very different roles for men and women.
Women seem to be like irrational children for him.
How does he give advice to gay people?
They don't have this traditional roles in their relationships.

I wonder, does he date women who have their own money and don't need dresses or other stuff? Wonder how this works.

When you are in a permanent relationship like a marriage or a family member or something like that it's obviously different.

Most of his stories were about women he isn't serious about.

In a marriage you have to decide if it really bothers you enough to do anything about it.

How many times you gonna talk about it and explain your feelings?

If it's something that truly bothers you then you have to do something about it. An action step.

Maybe you find a new more convenient place for the basket. Maybe you have a basket moving schedule. Maybe you make one of the kids be in charge of basket moving. Or maybe you are more petty and stop doing one of your chores until he notices. 🙃

If you do nothing, nothing will change. And that's fine if you are fine with it. But sometimes people aren't fine with that.