2663: Dante’s Inferno

[Mermaid]

Once my mother got fed up with my dad and us not pitching in with the chores. After months of conversations and "nagging".

She went on strike.

The only things she bought for groceries for a week was bread, peanut butter and jelly.

She also went pretty much MIA that week.

We got the message.

[Keith]

Well look at the German Dante over here...

[AstoriaGirl]

I think this mindset takes any action done outside of his expectation as "disrespect". reminds me of extreme religions. 'every action you take is a sin and underserving of forgiveness, amd therefor deserving of punishment".

if time management (or whatever) is that central to your soul, you shouldnt have married someone with shit time management. since he did, wmd has children and a life and kids and a mortgage and 15 years with this woman, he should shut the fuck up with these petty games.

[AstoriaGirl]

i also cant help buy cast shade at his physical appearance vs the physical appearance he expects from women (i listened to a couple episodes of his show).

[AstoriaGirl]

also, he goes on an on and on about how much he does for women in relationships that's unacknowledged and disrespected. what /exactly/ does he do for women he dates. also, I'd be willing to expect he takes a shit ton of emotional labor for granted.

i can't imagine what it must feel like to hate women that much.

[Sparrow]

Originally Posted by Mermaid

I think what he is saying is only getting such a negative reaction because it is coming from a man.

A woman not putting up with bullshit and disrespect. And being proactive in not allowing it in her life would be praised.

it's not b/c he's a man, it's b/c his style of retribution is petty. i'd say the same if the shit he was pulling came out of a woman's mouth. contriving circumstances like that to make points is juvenile and if it has come to that maybe it's already over and you're just smugly enjoying being mean. eat my goddamn sandwich and see how that plays out.

Originally Posted by Mermaid

But ey, ain't gonna ever catch me feeling bad for men. They made this bed.

this is also a bullshit attitude if you can't extend empathy to your brotherkin.

[Sparrow]

Originally Posted by Apia

That's true.
But I cured my child...

that's the point. training up a child is one thing, trying to train up a woman like you would a child is a whole. other. ballgame.

[Todd]

Here's why Dante's specific cabinet/towel advice won't work: they're not Keith's. They belong to Keith and Cat.

Taking away the cabinet doors so matter-of-factly and replacing towels ( specifically just Cat's, BTW) says nothing else besides "as man of the house, these are my items to bestow upon you or take away from you, as I see fit."

I know Keith doesn't look at it like this.

I extra know that Cat would absolutely not tolerate that bullshit for a hot second.

[Mermaid]

Originally Posted by Sparrow

that's the point. training up a child is one thing, trying to train up a woman like you would a child is a whole. other. ballgame.

I think you are taking his analogy too literally.

He didn't advocate for "training up a woman".

He said he had non negotiables.

Everyone in your life has things they will not deal with. You likely know them and avoid doing them. You aren't "trained". You are just respectful of their wishes.

When someone steps over your line you have to correct them immediately or they will continue to cross the line, because you didn't set the boundary and stick to it.

When I was younger I had a "no cursing" rule for boys who were interested in dating me. (cursing made me uncomfortable) When caking on the phone at night I would remind them 3 times before I would say "goodnight" and end the conversation. The action step worked every time. (teenagers love caking)

[Sparrow]

Originally Posted by Mermaid

I think you are taking his analogy too literally.

He didn't advocate for "training up a woman".

He said he had non negotiables.

Everyone in your life has things they will not deal with. You likely know them and avoid doing them. You aren't "trained". You are just respectful of their wishes.

When someone steps over your line you have to correct them immediately or they will continue to cross the line, because you didn't set the boundary and stick to it.

When I was younger I had a "no cursing" rule for boys who were interested in dating me. (cursing made me uncomfortable) When caking on the phone at night I would remind them 3 times before I would say "goodnight" and end the conversation. The action step worked every time. (teenagers love caking)

his "non-negotiable" of being disrespected (such vague, much opportunity to creatively punish) is fucking weird and it's odd to me you don't see the difference in what you're saying and what he's saying and how he behaves towards women.

how do you "correct" people in your life? what's the farthest you've gone to make a point?