2874: Get off My Planet
 

Keith and Chemda’s wedding officiating; Michael Rotondo’s moving update; Benedict Cumberbatch’s superhero story; Johnny Depp’s gaunt look; Rosanne Barr vs. Samantha Bee; Donald Trump and Kim Kardashian; Kanye West’s ye reviewed; convicted rapist and self-proclaimed pedophile runs for Congress; the good of Starbucks’s sensitivity training; even more Harvey Weinstein and Mario Batali accusers

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Writing in a third option for the poll: Super-Spider-Cumberbatch-Man.

Story sounds like something your uncle the uber driver tells at the cookout.

Some of it may be true....but also your uncle is drunk and likes to embellish.

I believe the story.

But only because I'm short and I feel like anyone who is over 6' tall can just grab people and throw them off other people. As misinformed as I may be, it's nice to imagine ;)

Cummerbund
 

I believe the Cummerbund story,

1. Very unlikely that guns would be involved so intervening in a fight is less dangerous.

2. More likely to be stabbed but if they recognised Cummerbund (if) they would probably get a ton of publicity for attacking him and it would’nt be worth it. The police would feel obligated to investigate such a high profile stabbing.

3. News has been reporting on acid attacks and increased mugging of delivery cyclists in recent years.

4. I think Cummerbund is too English and upper middle class to let someone make such a shit story up about him.

5. It’s typical of police to sell stories to the newspapers to make extra cash hence the delay in publishing a weak story.

6. The real story is that he was in an Uber when he’s minted from being in all those films ������ and should get in a black cab and pay ��

I shall add more salient points as they come to me.

Celebs receive all sorts of training for roles, so it's conceivable. Every time I hear of someone entering a fight to right some perceived injustice, I think why the hell would you put yourself in harm's way to save a stranger that probably just raped someone and that's why they're being beaten up to begin with? Maybe I'm just a New Yorker at heart.

BENAHDICT CUUUHHHHMBAH...BATCH

Benedict Cumberbatch once came to my rescue and helped me change a tire at side of the highway. He jacked the car up like it was nothing, his trusty Uber driver jumped into action and held the lug nuts in the hub cap. It was heroic. True story.

:)