3316: Mommy Issues w/ Kyle Ocasio
 

Forced poker shout-outs; Keith’s parental ultimatum; parental stress and mental health; Kyle’s nutritionist; friends, family, and politics; COVID-19, cops, masks, and Hollywood; 56-year-old Brad Pitt’s 27-year-old married girlfriend

Guest:
Kyle Ocasio
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Holy fuck y’all.

The people who want you to be “just comedy” and avoid politics are going to hate this show.

But holy fuck this show reminds me of why I love y’all. There was humour... but there was also such compassion and empathy and love from all of you. You make the world a better place by being real and supportive, and you make me laugh while you do it.

You’re awesome.

re: the poll
 

I'm sorry I ruined The Science. I said no but forgot I DID cry in the past 24 hours. I was watching Appa's Lost Days in Book 2 of A:TLA. That shit got me.

The unbelievable thing is, I know what you are talking about and have even seen the episode.
We’ve seen all of TLA and TLOK.

I like Brad Pitt less now.
27, why.
Im sure she is an old soul and it’s all about her smarts.

Kyle is onto something about our gut bacteria having an effect on our mental health. The best way to keep it healthy is by having lots of fiber and a wide variety of fruit and veg for it to feed on. Having fermented stuff (kimchee, kombucha, yogurt, sauerkraut) can help introduce good bacteria too. You shouldn't have to take supplements (probiotics and fish oils if you're getting what you need from your food).

Controversial. Love it.

Oh Boy
 

The things that Kyle are saying are familiar to me. My daughter has developed Solar Urticaria and is depressed since lockdown, she needs to eat better and take more exercise but refuses to take the basic steps. I am frustrated and exhausted.

I got into Yoga in the past couple of years and I love it but unfortunately it comes with a price of listening to some far out conspiracy theories. Unfortunately lots of well meaning people are being brainwashed by these looney online theories. .

Not sure if you have ever heard of complex PTSD or DESNOS but it might be something worth reading up on. I found it very helpful when I really started to feel out of control.

Fruits and vegetables!

I'm glad to report even that you know who I'm working for I don't take any supplements.
The only thing I have at home is magnesium.

I voted yes. I did while listening to this episode. You are not alone Kyle. I’m so glad you found a support group. I’m dealing with issues with my own children and constantly worrying if I’m doing right by them.

The Gatorade thing though. And at least get a door stop. C’mon!

Hey, I cried 2 days ago, so that’s not far away.

My daughter really loved the dogs we met on our vacation, she wants to go there again and see them. She was afraid they have forgotten us and the love she still feels for them would be also forgotten. That was so sweet and pure that I cried.

Not to be controversial, I would dilute Gatorade with some water & sometimes I do the same with juice... it’s called custom drinks Keith but ok drink your juices off the rack! :D

I do the same. Its less sweet and I like it that way and I have double the amount.

lol my most recent cry was also from Avatar (the storm episode when he powers up at the end and overcomes his past failures UGHHHHHHH so beautiful).

Great episode. Kyle's right on with the situational anxiety thing, there's so much we can't control right now that we're all kind of having to accept a new baseline of feeling crappy. If you were dealing with depression before the world went to shit it's not going to get any easier in the short term.

The best thing I've done for my mental health recently is exercise. Diet...ehhh still working on that but happy for everyone with healthy guts.

The poll should have been “do you water down your Gatorade?” Because no. Kyle. No. People are not doing that. Yes it IS too sweet. But people drink it AND they like to drink it how it comes. Lmao

Edited to say I *have* watered down Gatorade but that’s not the case MOST of the time. To say most people water down their Gatorade is silly

Welcome to Team Avatar, Apia

Everyone in our house loves Avatar.

I think we need this poll. Keith, can we have it?

I would think that most people would like to water it down but I might be totally wrong!
Especially since people in the US like stuff VERY sweet in my opinion. ( it’s really a difference!)
I would never drink a not watered down juice because it tastes like liquid diabetes unless I would otherwise die, of course!

I really appreciated hearing Kyle's take on her child's depression. I know as a kid growing up it must have been really hard for my parents. At 13 I was hospitalized for the first time. Thankfully I was able to find better ways to cope. You are correct there is no magical pill that will fix anything. For me it was trying to rework how I thought of things and then reacted to them. For me dialectical behavior therapy was huge. But honestly I can't imagine what it is like to be a teenager now. It's understandable to be depressed. They grow up with school shooting drill, Trump, the world literally on fire, and now Covid. All with no control. I hope your daughter is able to try to see some good when the world is really dark. Again thank you for expressing this. It made me cry and remember to call my mom.

You aren’t that controversial considering the history of Gatorade. The standard bottle of Gatorade was originally sold as a concentrate syrup for a drink cooler you see players drink from on the sideline. Then people started drinking the concentrate and they went with it.

it would have to be "do you water down any juice or drink you buy at the store" because like she did that too. My aunt did that. She was a penny pinching son of a bitch and did it so the drink would last longer. I'd rather just drink fucking water

Every step of parenting is harder than the previous. My crying in the past 24 hours similarly to Kyle was regarding parenting issues. This shit is hard.

A million kudos and virtual hugs to Kyle. What a beautiful thing she's doing in helping her daughter and loving her through these times. So many parents shrug off depression because adolescence is so volatile. Many take the "you'll get over it" mentality, and treat their teens like troublesome annoyances for being sad or anxious. Sure, it the feelings of turmoil may pass, but so might their trust and respect for that parent going forward. Whether this depression is an age-related phase or a lifelong struggle, Kyle is setting her child up for success and better coping, no matter what the future holds. Thank you for doing that for her.

Yeah fuck eating that crap! If it didn't cry when it died why would I eat it?

Did I just make your heart stumble a beat? I'm kidding.
I love grains! Bread, waffles, cereal & of course PASTA! I also love fruit. I eat one yogurt for breakfast everyday. We always have fresh fruit around.

My son is a total fruit kid, he eats like a pint of blueberries and a quart of strawberries nearly every day. I'm not even kidding. He also hates chocolate, milk and candy (except Skittles). He wont eat cake so for his birthday we make a "cake" out of watermelon. This year his aunt cut the watermelon into the shape of a spider used blueberries for eyes and the rind as fangs and legs. as for veggies I try to order extra veggies in my Thai food dish. I like broccoli and green bean, peas. I don't consider corn, potatoes as veggies, I think of them more like a grain because they are all starch/sugar. Kale is shit!

Oh wow.
Envy.
Our daughter eats fruits and vegetables and is great with self regulation in this matter.
Our son, not so much.
He is raised in the same house, with the same vegetable loving mother, but he would only eat bread and chocolate if you let him. Our pediatrician was helpful he said his kids were the same when they were little and we should relax and keep on being a good example.
Our son is a slim and fit kid, because why not prove my believes wrong.

Yin
 

I did a little cry in Yin Yoga this evening, why? Cause I’m fucking exhausted by all this shit.

Damn, right in the feels!

I'm not an easy crier but damn when Kyle started crying it almost got me going.

I love Woke Keith BTW.

I'd totally date Kyle, babe and cool as hell.

I feel for Kyle. We are foster parents and have an almost 10 month old who was shaken by his mother. He’s been having issues with infantile spasms and we’ve had to have him on all kinds of medications-including a shot from hell that made him miserable. He swelled up, only stopped crying when I would hold him. And even then I had to really work on calming him down. I’ve cried so many times for this poor guy. Circumstances outside of my control are happening-he was suffering so bad-we have to stop these spasms to hopefully give him a chance of being able to develop normally-if they aren’t stopped, he will be dependent for the rest of his life-according to the neurologist. He’s now on this medication that has a 30% chance of making him go blind. Luckily now he is doing much better and is smiling-but we won’t know if any of this stuff has worked. We are looking at another 24 hour EEG In the future.

So sorry to hear that your daughter was hospitalized due to her depression. I can’t imagine how hard that was on all of you. And the mental health system is unfortunately overtaxed right now. My coworkers and I are doing everything we can to keep our two psychologists in Veteran geriatric home care going-because they are getting hit hard right now too-and feeling guilty for not being able to do more.


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"But wouldn't YOU feel weird if we got a lock?"
"No that's okay."
"Oh okay, if you say so I guess we can get one"


AND THAT'S WHY WE CALL THEM THE DIAMOND DOGS

Gatorade is for after an extreme work out, to replenish lost salt, sugar and water when regular water would not help hydrate you. It should not be drank regularly.

Juice in the great USA IS sugar water. Yes SUGAR water. NOT real juice. No mater what the label says unless you see it made fresh it is put through a process to eliminate bacteria similar to milk. But with juice (yes all juice) it eliminates the flavor. It comes out colored water so they juice companies got a waiver from the FDA to add "natural flavor" and "natural sugar" to get back to juice taste AND they can do so with out disclosing it and say it's 100% juice even "Fresh".

Ever notice how each brand of juice in the US tastes the same every time?
I bet you could pick the brand in a blind taste test! They have their own formula to get that taste. Artificial flavors and added refined beat sugar as well as some added nutrients.

Truly natural juice would taste different every time. When was the last time you ate two of any fruit and they tasted just the same?

Juice is not good for you.

<3
 

I felt for Kyle so much during this episode > my mami barely had a mami & my abuelo was on the cold side with her and of course the universe gave her a super “emotional bebe”...

Kyle you are years ahead and way more present/aware/empathetic etc than my mami was... we had a super loud and super Puertorican breakthru last year but it was YEARS of built up shit even with her being a somewhat “woke” mom over the years....

This too shall pass, hold on to your babies with an open but strong connection... also Keith once you see them as your kids vs “step kids” << as a many times over step kid >> once they are YOUR kids then you step in as a parent, till then <respectfully> you are a side line player which is super easy for you and the kids, for now......

PS: I had a rowing coach that used to water down our Gatorade. I don't even really like it, but watered down is truly vile.

While Gatorade isn't made for regular consumption, neither is added sugar in general, and it's what cancels out the nasty salty taste.

Much easier than installing a lock.
https://www.amazon.com/JQK-Stopper-S...73/ref=sr_1_23

Kudos to Kyle for being there and trying so hard with her daughter. When I was a depressed teenager my parents' solution was to yell and lecture at me. Eventually they sent me to a shrink, but it didn't help.

As a (slightly, what's a decade?) older Maya who had to navigate the mental illness world alone, I'm glad Maya has Kyle as her mom. It's amazing what a supportive parent can do in this type of situation. And stepdad Kieth must help too, I'm sure. It's a team effort to raise a good kid.

Fermented stuff...I've got this one down...

I’ll think on it. So far she owes me $4 and I don’t think she wrote it down.

I'm happy to cover this one time debt for her. Us Mayas need to stick together.

Mumming
 

Well my mumming was made harder on Tuesday after I found out my daughter had watched that suicide video on Instagram that is doing the rounds. In a normal world that wasn’t some sort of facist media hellscape that video would’nt be circulating.