3586: The Perfect Host
 

It’s all here! How do you be a perfect host or house guest? World travelers Keith and Chemda help save the day! The duo also discusses why people aren’t going to movie theaters, the latest Dancing with the Stars victim, and the controversy over Netflix’s Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story. Enjoy; and remember, if your dad tells you that it’s that time of the year to suck his thumb again, it’s probably a trick.

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gave myself 5 Stars, obviously. my Granny was a Southern, Post-War, college educated housewife; real Mona Lisa Smile shit. call me at 4:30 with a surprise dinner party for 8 including your boss. i dare you, bitch.

4 Stars.
It's a house with two bathrooms so Keith could have his own shower. I cook every night but mostly vegetarian he might miss meat.
Beautiful landscape that is green and not brown, a train station in walking distance.
Kids rather fun than annoying.
I could take him in the morning to a city I drive to ( i have many beautiful cities in my sales area)where he could check it out and bring him back in the afternoon for free.
+ cute dog - no video games + living room with projector and 4 streaming services - would try to talk feelings with him + very good electric bike - I would force him to go on hikes

4-Stars.

I deducted a star for being in suburban NJ.

I love hosting people... I only want a bigger house so I can have a big guest suite for people and entertain more.

Why staying at my house is awesome:
1. I'll make sure there's a variety of snacks, from salty to sweet, crunchy to soft, hot or cold - your cravings will be met.
2. I will offer you weed.
3. Low-pressure hang - no need to feel "on" at all. Wanna watch movies? Scroll on your phone? Read? Sit outside and look at stars? I'm down for that. (Wanna go out on the town? See reason for deducting one star)
4. You can feed the deer outside. I have a cool swinging egg chair on my patio.
5. You want to buy ME dinner? You shouldn't have. There are plenty of good restaurants to go to, or if we are staying home and getting stoned, there is plenty to choose from on delivery apps.
6. I have a guest bathroom and like putting out nice products for my friends to try. (BFF raved just this past weekend "I love staying at your house, I always get to try neat skincare products.")
7. My humblebrag? Spend a bunch of time cleaning and making things perfect, then apologizing for "the mess" when guests arrive as if it doesn't smell like sunkissed linen and I wasn't scrubbing the baseboards.

I think it does say something about you if most of your friends cheat on their partners and you hang around and make excuses for them often.

It doesn't influence everyone to the same degree, but, at the very least, you're going to be a little more lax while getting shit-faced. Why would you put yourself into increasingly risky situations and add alcohol on top of it? Some people are easily influenced, especially when they're in a vulnerable state.

I suppose if it's a rare outing, what I'm saying is less relevant.

More:
It's Europe and American seem to enjoy that.
We can travel to Berlin, Amsterdam, Paris....pretty fast because I live basically in the center of Europe.
I will pick you up from the airport, it's the second biggest one in Europe I think.
It's 25 minutes from here.
Direct flights from most airports.

-5 stars. We don’t have a spare bed so he would have to sleep on an air mattress or our couch which is regularly jumped on by our kids and we have 5 cats none of whom understand/care about boundaries. Our son likes to wake up at 2-3 in the morning and throw his biggest and loudest toys on the floor.

We haven’t had anyone stay with us for years lol.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I'm comin ovah.

Ok! Bring snacks!

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Pretty central I would say.