992: Keith is a Drunk

[John Galt]

Originally Posted by sully_04

so, these are the reasons this dude says Keith is an alcoholic?

substitute the podcast part for my 15 years playing a child's game (professionally) and the book part read "movie treatment" this dude is talking about me.

why do I come in here and do this too myself, these people are idiots.

A vast array of experiences and age groups congregate here ... I find people who have always done things by the book and who have never made a bad decision to be entirely uninteresting to talk to.

[King of Assholes]

-never had a real career outside of this podcast - Would you say this if he chose some other career and was successful? If someone went to college, got their masters, started a business, then made millions you wouldn't put them down just because they had success with one of the first things they tried.
-does the podcast at bizarre times of the day as it fits his schedule, not punching a clock. - It would be nice if they did it at the same time every day, but they're not working around your schedule or mine. Even if they did I'd probably listen live once more per week and I still download every show now. It works...
-shits in very bizarre locations - Yes, but he did that on purpose. For example, every 2 months or so I would shit in my own hamper and not know til I found it the next day. That's problematic shitting, Keith's shitting was just kinda fucked up.
-jerked off in the bathroom at a CHILDRENS party - It sounds weird when you put it like that but jerkin it kills time, we've all done it in weird places. It's not like he did it while he was painting a kids face, and it's not like he was thinking about the kids while he did it.
-hates a guy and actually thinks that someone that had his shit from years ago may still have the drunken ramblings of a homeless person that he believes will become americas best selling novel. - I think you're taking that whole thing a little too seriously. I doubt he really thinks he'll ever get that shit back but maybe he's just a little sore that something he worked hard on is gone forever.
-has never been able to publish his novel after years of fucking around with it - So he's no different than most people who ever wrote a book, except he's self-publishing it now and has a book he worked on with Chemda that is being published. Sounds like the hard work is paying off, also I remember with the relationship book Chemda talking about how he was drinking less and being real on-point with his shit for getting that done.
-uses fake names at hospitals due to no money - So do black people
-has horrible credit (according to him) - See above

[Uncast]

Originally Posted by sully_04

BTW drink tracker:
2.5 pints of draught bear.
3 bottles of 12oz of bear.

OK based on your intake, I clearly have no problem at all. So let's scrap my earlier alcoholic claim. I'm not even a drunk, let alone alcoholic.

June 29th: 14 oz. Beer (Port Brewing Shark Attack)
June 30th: 14 oz. Beer (AleSmith Brewing Summer YuleSmith)
July 1st: 26 oz. Beer (Miller Lite & New Belgium Fat Tire), 3 oz. Scotch
July 2nd: 24 oz Beer (Lagunitas Undercover Investigation Shut-Down Ale & New Belgium Fat Tire)
July 3rd: 20oz Beer (Stone 13th Anniversary Ale)

Shit. I need to catch up.

[sully_04]

Originally Posted by Uncast

OK based on your intake, I clearly have no problem at all. So let's scrap my earlier alcoholic claim. I'm not even a drunk, let alone alcoholic.

June 29th: 14 oz. Beer
June 30th: 14 oz. Beer
July 1st: 26 oz. Beer, 3 oz. Scotch

Shit. I need to catch up.

I am, if you havent heard a monster.

that is a light night compared to say last fall, or January when I didnt have a taste for nearly 2 months.

try 8-15 cans of beer, or half bottle of vodka a night, 6 nights a week easy. never drunk.

unplugging from the chat everynight has had serious effects on my consumption.

tis true, the fans are the enablers. I am guilty.

[DJ Trashy]

I happen to have the capability to drink until I don't remember things the next day. I don't generally like blacking out like that, but I still occasionally do it. Here's my intake so far in recent history.

June 26 - 4-5 beers (high school reunion)
June 27 - 2 Landshark beers (high school reunion)
June 30 - 1 Landshark beer (reunion committee follow-up)
July 1 - 2-3 glasses of wine at home

it will drop a lot going forward because it's normally about a bottle of wine a week.

[EastTexas]

This is a long story, but I swear there is a payoff at the end.

So yesterday I was on my lunch hour at work, which because of my early shift falls at 9am. I decided to have some breakfast at Sonic. I pulled into a nice shady spot, made my order, and turned KATG up on my PDA. If you've never been to a Sonic it's like an old style restaurant where they have lots of stalls where you pull in and each stall has an order board. You push a button and talk to the cashier and a girl on roller skates comes and brings it out.
They also have their own classic 50's and 60's music piped out to the whole parking lot, so I had to turn my KATG up kind of loud to hear it over Sonics music.

I'm a little behind and was listening to this episode. I'm relaxing and I hear someone flipping out. I hear an raspy womans voice talking loudly, "No, fuck you, yeah fuck you, FUCK YOU!" I start looking in my side mirrors and the rearview, and I'm turning around trying to see if someone is yelling at one of the carhops, or in one of the parking stalls. I don't see anyone. I even paused the show so I could hear what was going on. A few minutes later I hear this same voice again angrily yelling, "Mind your own god damn business, you mind your OWN GOD DAMN BUSINESS!!"

I put KATG on pause and look around again. Nothing, no one is around. I start playing it again. Like 5-10 minutes later it starts up again, "Why don't you just leave me alone. I'm not gonna talk about this!" I hit pause, look around and it stops again.

I'm starting to think, what the fuck? Is it something that got embedded in the show audio? Every time I hit pause, the voice stops.

I play a little more and hear something incomprehensible, but the voice sounded mad still, but quieter. I have to head back to work, so I pull out and drive around the lot to get out.
As I'm leaving I see on the street side of the lot, there was an old homeless lady laying in the grass. She was just on the other side of some bushes where my truck had been parked.

So, via my playing this episode loud in public.
Chemda was harassing this poor old homeless woman about her drinking issues. So there you go Keith, this homeless lady knows just how you were feeling and was on your side buddy.

[MaxxedMan]

Okay...

Tuesday 11 Harpoon IPA
Wednesday 4 Harppon IPA and 6 Soco Shots

I woke up at 6:30 am fully dressed and noticed my webcam was still on for the super party, lucky, mostly pointed away from my bed.

This binge is officially over. I'm back to water until the 4th.

[BrownEyedBtch]

As long as Keith doesn't drive (he barely leaves the house), can still get it up (Chemda says they take fuck breaks), and gets women to show tits on live video (*cough*), he can drink as much as he wants.

[dEadERest]

Originally Posted by sully_04

as recovering freaks you know you are powerless over it, stop trying to control yourself vicariously through Keith Malley.

sage

Originally Posted by King of Assholes

The difference is alcoholics can get worse, retards level off.

werd

Originally Posted by BrownEyedBtch

As long as Keith doesn't drive (he barely leaves the house), can still get it up (Chemda says they take fuck breaks), and gets women to show tits on live video (*cough*), he can drink as much as he wants.

and tied with a bow

[random]

This was the 2nd best episode ever, 2nd only to "Keeping It Real"