My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. It's mine.

[EllaMacFarlane]

Originally Posted by NinjaPirate

Best advise so far. Sex - 101.

Good luck though dude, I would say roll the dice like Alfie - sometimes you win

does keith know? keith has got to know! they talked about this story on the show before!

[jeffdrafttech]

Originally Posted by NinjaPirate

Best advise so far. Sex - 101.

Good luck though dude, I would say roll the dice like Alfie - sometimes you win

In case he doesn't click the link: it's the story of the 12 year old Brittish boy who was supposedly the fater of a newborn with his 15 year old girlfriend.

I'll skip to the good part (click ninjapirate's link for the full story)

Originally Posted by linked story

...a DNA test has proved that Alfie Patten was not a father at 12-years-old, as was initially reported.
[snip]
"Other stupid boys are lying, saying bad things, like they have slept with Chantelle too. But I am the only boyfriend she has had and we've been together for two years, so I must be the dad."

[golgi body]

Originally Posted by jeffdrafttech

The future is dim if she keeps it. Bipolar is a special kind of crazy where women are either overconfident whores or blubberingly nonfunctional lumps. Abortion is the only humane choice.

Couldn't agree more.

[thepetek]

Originally Posted by Draconis

Punch her in the stomach.

HARD.

Or push her down a small flight of stairs a little later on.

Or... take some time to decide what you're going to do. It's something that is really touchy, and it'll take some thought. I had my son when I was 17, but I was also married... It's not the best situation, but it's doable, and you have a few options. Best thing to do would be to get together and talk about it, but talk calmly, if possible. Don't freak out on her, because chances are, she's more scared than you are.

Best option, though, is a punch in the stomach.

Or just a hanger whilst she's asleep, if you can manage it.

I'm not gonna call child protective services. But I will feel guilty about that.

[roxymodest]

Originally Posted by jeffdrafttech

So she's being treated for being a bipolar with suicidal thoughts? Well done!

At least you picked good breeding stock. Yes, you were breeding with her if you fucked her without a rubber. Did they neglect to teach you where babies come from in health class? Did your dad neglect to tell you that women lie about being on the pill, or fuck up taking the pill, or sabotage the pill "accidentally" in some way?

The future is dim if she keeps it. Bipolar is a special kind of crazy where women are either overconfident whores or blubberingly nonfunctional lumps. Abortion is the only humane choice.

most disturbingly awesome reply to this thread.

WOW. young man...what led you to this stupidity? that is all i ask...

[RichieGB]

Originally Posted by roxymodest

WOW. young man...what led you to this stupidity? that is all i ask...

Here's two clues!

Originally Posted by roxymodest

young

Originally Posted by roxymodest

man

I think you've cracked this one.

[jeffdrafttech]

Originally Posted by roxymodest

WOW. young man...what led you to this stupidity? that is all i ask...

Seven year relationship with bipolar crazy bitch who was often an overconfident whore or a blubbering lump.

What brilliant life experience leads you to believe that I'm wrong?

[decola]

Have you seen Juno?

[John Galt]

Originally Posted by opee

Lithium and Welbutrin. I believe this is the extent of it.

Go with her to her doctor after doing some research and getting your schitck down cold. It's a good bet that the doctor will recommend terminating the pregnancy because of her mental condition and the effect those drugs are already having on the fetus. Then go with her to the clinic and see it through to the end.

Don't pussy out or you'll regret it. She's documentably unstable and prone to irrationality.

Alternatively, fall madly in love with her and throw yourself into the relationship and situation. If you choose this option, however, for goodness sake document the ensuing fireworks and inevitiable flame out on film so that you have a train wreck documentary to fall back on.

[RoundAbout]

I'll email you a coupon for a free abortion.