what's the weirdest injury you've ever gotten?

[Mainiac]

Three years ago I cut through 2/3rds of my right thumb with a power saw. It wasn't too "weird" an injury, but it sucked big time. I freaked out, wrapped it in a shop towel, and ran into the house and called 911. Wife and kids weren’t home, so I just cried like a little girl while the 911 gal talked me down as much as she could. There was a tremendous amount of blood. I was going into shock when maybe 5-10 minutes later EMS showed up and took me to the hospital. The surgeon was amazing and because of her talent I have nearly 100% use of it today.

I have pictures when I was changing bandages about a week after the accident, if it's appropriate to post I can post one.

[Uncast]

Got woken up by the phone one morning about 4 years ago. I leap out of bed, not realizing I had thrown my blanket on the floor. My computer desk was fairly close to my bed and I had a chair mat there on the floor. So I step on the blanket, which was covering the chair mat and of course the blanket slides, I go falling on my ass and sliding toes first right into the computer desk. Had two small toes on my right foot swollen and black for a couple weeks. Hurt like hell.

In a similarly stupid move, on parents night before pass and review while I was in Navy boot camp, I was getting ready and I had my uniform on but was only wearing socks. I was rushing around getting ready and of course I turn a corner to get my boots, miscalculate the turn and slam my pinky toe (again the right foot) into the bunk post (these are metal). Judging by my toe growing to over twice it's size, black and I couldn't walk on it, I'm guessing I broke it. Buddy of mine who had just had surgery on his knees handed me a few of whatever pain meds they gave him and I floated out to parent's night.

Needless to say, that toe don't look too right.

[Alfredo]

Originally Posted by Mainiac

I have pictures when I was changing bandages about a week after the accident, if it's appropriate to post I can post one.

Let's see them

[i_like_cheese_2001]

I got a scar over the right eye from when I was at a McDonald's for a girl's 5th birthday party. She shoved me into the table and I had to get stitches (first and only time).

I got stabbed in the eye in first grade with a pencil. (me and the class idiot in front of me were furiously trying to erase my worksheet about Abe Lincoln where I made him say "I eat butts!!!!" before the teacher came. Poor motor skills + sharp objects = losing eyes.

My friend had a scooter back in 8th grade, like this one, but not powered. Being the 12 year old geniuses we were, we decided to put bike pegs on the front wheel, so we could ride it two personed down a hill. That got tiring after a while, so I rode it down the hill sitting down. I leaned into a turn at the bottom of the hill, the peg hit the ground, and (because the peg hit the ground on one side, the handlebars rotated super quickly. And (because supergenius over here was sitting down, and the handlebars were now at eye level) cracked me square in the eyebrow. I'm still sporting a wicked scar over the left eye from this one. Should have gone to a hospital, but I don't care for the smell.

The last full day of 8th grade, the gym class walked on a field trip to McDonald's. With the Jackass TV series in full-swing, the walk was filled with various acts of stupidity, but nothing resulting in injury. Once we got to McDonalds, we decided we'd rather eat Little Debbies at the gas station across the street (note: highway). We ran off across the parking lot hoping the teachers wouldn't see us, and jumped through the row of hedges at the other end of the lot. Everyone else just sorta hopped through, but (with me being awesome and all), I decided to swan dive as high and dramatically as I could. Unbeknownst to me, the ground on the other side of the hedges wasn't level with the parking lot, but was in fact, a giant ditch (on the side of a rural highway? Who knew...). I landed on my side with a crack, and sprinted across the street, but it felt like I got punched in the stomach. Turns out I broke my collarbone (there was about 4 inches of separation between the two pieces of bone). I got to ride back to school in the teacher’s Mustang, where I proceeded to wave like the queen to all the “suckers” that had to make the trek back to school on foot. From the school I was picked up by my mom, and taken to the hospital where they told me the most obvious thing that I’ve ever paid 400 dollars to hear: I had broken my collarbone, and was about to have a very long, very boring summer.

Last year in shop class I shoved my thumb into a table saw to try and reach a piece of wood. It went in about a half inch from the tip down... still kinda hurts to text on my phone, but my video game ability has recovered fully.

I've singed hair off too many times to count messing around with lighter fluid/butane/fire/paper/etc. too many times to count it as a "weird" injury anymore.

That's all that (due to these and other various head injuries) I can remember for now...

[Mainiac]

Originally Posted by Alfredo

Let's see them

Top two were taken a week or so after the cut. The bottom two pictures were taken just now.

The yellow tips are long pins holding the bone together.

I was lucky because the blade missed all joints and I have nearly full range of motion now. Thank God for modern medical care.

Never cross cut 2x4s at an angle with a Skilsaw, the blade can jump.

[axis_of_evil]

I fell off the back of a Power Wheels car when I was 7 and landed on my arm, which fractured. "pow-pow-Power Wheels."

[DWarrior]

I went to slam my hand on the table, missed, and hit my nuts. Exponentially more nerdy than missing a high-five.

[talley]

I can't think of anything as big as cutting off part of my finger, but I guess I've got one. This afternoon, I cut my fingers twice taking a single cup of jell-o pudding out of it's box.

[sully_04]

i got impaled on a tree stump 2 days ago.

and a hemeraging urethra 15 years ago.

[sully_04]

Originally Posted by typicallistener

burned my hand silly last year after coming home drunk one night and attempting to pan fry me up some spring rolls.

dont use a lighter to freebase, try a torch.