what's the weirdest injury you've ever gotten?

[Roasty]

Maybe not that weird, but I guess anyone other than myself would find this somewhat funny:

3 years ago I managed to slip a disk (or some sort of nerve damage thing) in my lower back whilst having the sex. I've since gone though many incredibly painful "flare ups", every month or so. When they happen, there's nothing I can do but lay on the couch and try to find the least painful way to lay, its pathetic really. I don't have any insurance now, I managed one doctors visit before my health care dropped my ass, so I don't even know what it is. I tell people its from an incident at my previous job (landscaping) but no, I was just trying a little to hard that night. Sad face.

[hellbent]

when i was 14, i had a job delivering newspapers, i had a front rack on my bike, loaded with newspapers. i hit an obscured drainage cover, my bike flipped forware and my front tooth met pavement. my friend was with me and grabbed the rear wheel. i was in a daze, it happened so fast. a guy driving past stopped to see if i was okay.
i lost a front tooth, the newspaper paid to have a crown put on, which is now the wrong color, but im too lazy to go to the dentist.

when i was 6, i was sitting on the bed while my older sister was ironing a shirt, she put the iron down on the bed, got up and the iron flipped over unto the back of my hand, making this cool scar. its almost gone now.

[Dodges Bullets]

My great-grandmother had an interior brick wall in her house.

It was my third birthday and my older cousin was going to give me a birthday spanking and being three I only knew that I wanted no part in a spanking so I ran...into the brick wall face first. Twenty four years later I still have the Harry Potteresque scar on my forehead.

[st0l3n]

I had a 20kg alloy ingot fall on my foot it missed everything apart from my little toe it mashed it to pieces
When it healed it fused the second joint in my toe
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[porky2468]

After a drunken night out once, my friend was moaning that her feet were hurting as she was wearing heels. Since I was in trainers and had painless feet, I thought the nice thing to do would be to offer her a piggy back! She declined first of all, but I convinced her to jump on.

So, off we go down the road. Then I can feel the top half of my body moving faster than my bottom half, so I start running to try and keep up, but my top half keeps going faster until I fall flat on my face with my friend on top of me (she's not that heavy but I'm sure it made it worse). And since I was giving her a piggy back (and was drunk so had v slow reactions) I didn't have any hands to break my fall! I had a big graze on my chin, gave myself my first ever black eye, had big cuts on my eye brow and under my eye where the little bits of pavement got in there and my glasses got all smashed Luckily I had another pair of glasses, so at least I wasn't blind, but I liked these ones best! I eventually got the lenses replaced (luckily there wasn't much damage to the frames), which set me back about £100. It was the most expensive piggy back ever!!

[BrianAlt]

I was playing touch football in the street, 2 on 2. I was the receiver. QB said hike and I took one step and fell over. I looked around for the person the threw a rock at my heel. No one was there. I looked for the car that backed into me. Nope. Then I realized, I had just ruptured my Achilles. It was 8 months before I was able to walk without crutches or a cane.

I was at the airport and my bag was falling over. I went to grab it and got my hand caught between a steel table and the bag. The bottom of the table sliced open my knuckle below my left pointer finger. The skin was totally sliced through, about 2 inches across. There was little pain and little blood, but the bone and cartilage and tendons were totally exposed. It looked really freaky. Six or seven stitches closed it up and I was fine, but it was pretty odd seeing your own insides like that.

[Alfredo]

When I was seven or eight, riding a bike downhill in a parking lot the breaks failed and I hit my chin on a wall. I had to have emergency plastic surgery; the surgeon pulled bits of concrete out of the chin bone and did the best to close the gash up. All I remember was looking down and seeing red all over my shirt and my mom putting pressure on the cut.

[aunt_helen]

1.) My first month of college, I was late for class and trying to finish up a project first thing in the morning on my dorm room kitchen floor. To save time, I decided to prop the cardboard I was cutting with an X-Acto blade upright and saw through it, instead of making multiple scores the way you should. In my haste, I'd propped the cardboard on my thigh instead of the floor, so when the blade went through, it poked into my jeaned leg a little - or so I thought. I didn't feel anything, but I stood up and instantly felt warmth at my foot. I took down my pants and saw a 1/2-inch hole in my thigh that was spurting blood out in a fountain, in regular sprays that matched the rhythm of my heartbeat. The entire inch of blade had gone into my leg and hit a major vein.

I freaked out, put a wad of toilet paper on my leg, and ran to the nurse's office in the building. It was closed. So I walked about ten blocks to the building my class was in to explain that I was going to be late, then walked back and waited at the office until they opened. I have a scar and an indent in the muscle today, and if I press on it it's still sensitive, a dozen years later.

2.) Fast forward about three years, my senior year of college. I was walking home and had a backpack on with pockets on the back, full of pens and drafting supplies, and my trusty X-Acto. I'd learned by now to keep the plastic cap on the thing, but it must've fallen off, and somehow the blade had poked through the pocket material and wedged the knife vertically, sticking through into a separate pocket, in which I kept my apartment keys.

Several blocks from my building I was waiting at a crosswalk and reached into my bag for my keys. My thumb hit the X-Acto and the tip popped like a grape. I pulled my hand out and blood flowed down my arm, pooling on the pavement. This being in Manhattan, there was a substantial crowd of people around me waiting to cross the street, all of whom watched with me as my arm became more and more bloody. I just sort of shrugged and grinned, and for the rest of the year I could follow the trail of blood drops I'd left on that last two blocks home.

3.) Two days after I'd graduated and school had ended for the year, I was the last person still living in the dorms, and I was up late working on some project. Cue the X-Acto, which by now I was *very* wary of and cautious with. I was using a straightedge to make cuts and the blade skipped over the metal edge and sliced my left index fingertip almost completely off. It was hanging by a little piece of skin. No one was around, and so I wrapped my hand in toilet paper (not recommended) and went across the park to the all-night A&P to buy band-aids. The cashier stared at me when I went to check out, holding a huge bloody wad of TP on my hand and buying band-aids. He told me I should go to the hospital, and I had to admit it seemed the thing to do, since I was bleeding so hard the band-aids were slipping off my finger as soon as I put them on.

I went to Beth-Israel and waited two hours behind a man in a wheelchair who'd pissed himself, watching urine drops hit the floor. When they put me in a room to hose out my finger into a big plastic yellow tub, they left the door open to the waiting room, so everyone could watch me cry and shudder. It was about three in the morning at this point and I left with six stitches in my hand and a huge bandage. Since it was two days since I'd officially ended school, I was no longer covered on my dad's health insurance, and I had to pay the $660 bill by myself. I ended up taking the stitches out myself weeks later with a suture removal kit my mom brought home from work.

I am VERY careful with the mighty X-Acto nowadays. Three times's the charm.

[RachaelBachael]

Helen, did you go to school in New York? Where? And what did you go to school for, needing an x-acto knife all the time?

[bithead]

When I was about 10 years old, my younger sister and I were watching "Escape to Witch Mountain" on Disney. Some harmless horseplay during one of the commercials... then... she sliced one of my eyes open with her fingernail. (Yes, it is all fun and games until someone takes a fingernail to the eye. )

Fortunately, it was a surface cut, towards the outer edge of my eye; I didn't lose any sight. The Emergency Room filled my eye with glue-like-goo to keep my eye shut (blinking would only open the cut further - EEK), and a bright white patch for 2 weeks. That resulted in other minor injuries since my depth perception was poor, but nothing as serious as the original eye injury.