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Old 03-02-2007, 12:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
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jadogg1222's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Berea, KY
Posts: 159
Originally Posted by solid_liquid View Post

A humanoid robot is teaching itself to walk and eventually run around a California research lab.

They can now run to you and kill you with the buzz saw they have attached to their hands.

Hell next they'll start to compete in the olympics and out run us blacks.

Now that was H I larious. Fuck them there robots we need to take all of them and blow them up if not when they take over here are some steps to take to survive the uprising.


1. HOOD - To thwart rapidly improving facial-recognition systems, don a hood or a hat - the fabric makes the shape of your head more difficult to identify.

2. GOGGLES - The good thing about getting zapped with a laser: The wound will cauterize instantly. The bad thing: If it hits your eyes, you're blind. Welder's goggles will protect your most sensitive sensor.

3. CROWBAR - Using a kung fu chop on a titanium-and-steel killing machine will only get you a broken hand (and maybe a hearty laugh if your adversary has an emotion chip). Arm yourself with a heavy, blunt weapon, like an old-fashioned crowbar.

4. COMPASS - Knowing how to spot an andriod is half the battle. Hold a compass next to the suspect. If the bot's magnetic field makes the needle go haywire, bolt.

5. DIRT BIKE - Robots have a hard time navigating rough terrain. a bicycle can get you to safety. Besides, at this point, you ought to distrust anything with an engine.

6. CAPE - Newer bots can recognize their prey by its walk. A nice long cape or trench coat can disguise your gait.

[as found in Wired Magazine pg 173, June 2006 - by Daniel Wilson]
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