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Old 03-01-2014, 08:49 AM   #41 (permalink)
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Those graffiti pictures gave me the chills. That shit is scary. I can't imagine.

Be safe, you guys.
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Old 03-01-2014, 09:53 AM   #42 (permalink)
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I think I know where Johnny is...
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Old 03-01-2014, 10:09 AM   #43 (permalink)
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Really sad to hear about this vandalism on Chemdas house. What if you have a painting party during the April festivities?
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Old 03-01-2014, 10:11 AM   #44 (permalink)
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i don't think leaving that mess up for a month and a half is ideal.
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Old 03-01-2014, 02:14 PM   #45 (permalink)
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still have to be responsible for your actions. that's what adults do. the things i do when my brain chemistry goes off the rail aren't attached to a carte blanche of forgiveness by society or the people i hurt.

chemda and lauren are not his family. their love is not unconditional. they are not responsible for this person. he could very well be a manipulative piece of shit, mental disorder notwithstanding. understanding only goes so far when property and person are threatened.

No one is disagreeing with you. Did you even read my post? The point was that it might not have been as personal as it seems and more of just an outburst. No one said he isnt responsible.
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Old 03-06-2014, 09:01 AM   #46 (permalink)
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I disagree about the whole blacks are more likely to be homophobic on a personal level. I think it's more about religion than race. And many of these states that have homophobic laws are deeply religious and racist. I know Keith was saying that white people are in charge in these states so of course it's white people making these homophobic laws.

Well those white people don't just stop existing when they clock out of their job as a judge or politician. Those people go home and make up folks' families, communities, churches ect. They're not just homophobic from 9 to 5 they are homophobic all the time.

Even in California with Prop 8 the Mormon church spent millions of dollars to make sure marriage equality wouldn't pass and instead the failure of marriage equality gets put at the feet of the black church which is a much smaller proportion of the population in Cali and even less so when it comes to votes tallied.

All that being said I still find it somehow WORSE when black people are homophobic b/c we have so many of the same shared struggles with civil rights in this country. I just think the "black people are MORE homophobic" thing is a divide and conquer tactic that keeps people who should be allies fighting with each other to make themselves feel superior on a moral level.
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Old 03-07-2014, 10:03 AM   #47 (permalink)
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Just listening to this now... I'm 9 minutes in Chemda, a perfectly decent person, is in tears. Hugs to you and Lauren, this really sucks.
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Old 03-17-2014, 12:56 PM   #48 (permalink)
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Catching up on shows and just heard this one. I'm heartbroken - not because this happened, but because I knew that inevitably this was going to happen and I knew how much it would crush Chemda when it did.

Johnny is a classic con artist and it was just a question of when (not if) he would screw her over. It was always really sad to hear Chemda constantly defend him against Keith's (rightful) suspicions about Johnny's character - eerily similar to the rationalizations of a battered wife ("You don't understand him", "he's changed, I swear", etc).

As an outsider not being subjected to Johnny's charms (con artists are always charming), I could see the red flags a mile away: Criminal record, inconsistent living arrangements, natural gift for storytelling, vague "artistic" aspirations - and most of all, a claimed disdain for money in general and the capitalist system in particular (the easiest way to convince people to part with their money is to convince them that the very concept of money itself is worthless). Once Chemda mentioned that he had been staying at their old house and that Chemda had been covering his bills for months, I knew exactly what was coming before she even finished the story. Well, not the graffiti part - but the general vandalism, unpaid debts, attempts to turn the blame around, and the stolen property (yes, Chemda - he stole the bike and sold it for cash. Some random person in New York City is riding your bike around as we speak. For the love of god, please do not continue to harbor any delusions that he actually threw it out like he claimed).


Thieves and con artists like him don't change. Ever. Maybe one in a thousand actually turns his life around and becomes a decent person, but the other 999 will just go right back to the same shit because that's all they know. Forget the standard hippie line about how criminals are "victims of circumstance". It's bullshit. Lots of people grow up in hard circumstances, and the vast majority of them do NOT become criminals. Criminals become criminals because they lack empathy and morals.

Johnny isn't done conning and stealing. Now that he's squeezed every last penny out of Chemda and exhausted her trust, he's just going to find another trusting person and do the same shit over again. People like him don't care, they don't learn, and they don't change.
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Old 03-17-2014, 03:29 PM   #49 (permalink)
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Catching up on shows and just heard this one. I'm heartbroken - not because this happened, but because I knew that inevitably this was going to happen and I knew how much it would crush Chemda when it did.

Johnny is a classic con artist and it was just a question of when (not if) he would screw her over. It was always really sad to hear Chemda constantly defend him against Keith's (rightful) suspicions about Johnny's character - eerily similar to the rationalizations of a battered wife ("You don't understand him", "he's changed, I swear", etc).

As an outsider not being subjected to Johnny's charms (con artists are always charming), I could see the red flags a mile away: Criminal record, inconsistent living arrangements, natural gift for storytelling, vague "artistic" aspirations - and most of all, a claimed disdain for money in general and the capitalist system in particular (the easiest way to convince people to part with their money is to convince them that the very concept of money itself is worthless). Once Chemda mentioned that he had been staying at their old house and that Chemda had been covering his bills for months, I knew exactly what was coming before she even finished the story. Well, not the graffiti part - but the general vandalism, unpaid debts, attempts to turn the blame around, and the stolen property (yes, Chemda - he stole the bike and sold it for cash. Some random person in New York City is riding your bike around as we speak. For the love of god, please do not continue to harbor any delusions that he actually threw it out like he claimed).


Thieves and con artists like him don't change. Ever. Maybe one in a thousand actually turns his life around and becomes a decent person, but the other 999 will just go right back to the same shit because that's all they know. Forget the standard hippie line about how criminals are "victims of circumstance". It's bullshit. Lots of people grow up in hard circumstances, and the vast majority of them do NOT become criminals. Criminals become criminals because they lack empathy and morals.

Johnny isn't done conning and stealing. Now that he's squeezed every last penny out of Chemda and exhausted her trust, he's just going to find another trusting person and do the same shit over again. People like him don't care, they don't learn, and they don't change.
Wow. Hindsight. Smug.
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Old 03-17-2014, 04:24 PM   #50 (permalink)
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Wow. Hindsight. Smug.
What an amazing, detailed, and worthwhile contribution to the conversation. Douchebag.
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