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Keith 06-15-2020 03:42 PM

3282: Karen
Keith’s musical taste; COVID-19 and street drinking; Indian holy men and COVID exorcisms; BLM, SNL’s Jay Pharoah’s neck vs. officer’s knee, defunding the police, and how to catch racists; after denying it, the Secret Service admits to pepper spraying peaceful protesters; Black Trans Lives Matter and LGBTQ anti-discrimination laws; listener debates telling family about his abuse; Karens

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FingerLakes 06-15-2020 04:07 PM

Re: The Poll
I believe a Susan is the final form of a Karen and I just thought I'd put this here because of my answer to the poll

Sparrow 06-15-2020 06:07 PM

why do Karens hang out in parking lots?

Keith 06-15-2020 07:21 PM

porky2468 06-16-2020 03:24 AM

I'm listening to the part about Mike, and I have to say I agree with Keith on this one. Rape and abuse isn't sex. And from what I could tell, it started happening to him when he was about 7? So by beating around the bush, it would be making things confusing for the kid. Obv you don't want to offload your trauma onto your kid, Chemda was right on that part. But by giving mild examples (if someone takes their genitals out in front of you, if someone tries to touch your genitals or have you touch theirs) you can make sure they know what is and isn't ok. And I guess by saying it happened to him it would take the shame away from it if it did ever happen to the kid.

Regardless, Mike should do whatever he's comfortable doing and he's lucky he has such a loving and supportive wife.

bagelwagel 06-16-2020 09:51 PM

Brooklyn wasn't even the second city to paint "Black Lives Matter" on the street. Oakland had a week before Brooklyn. The reporter didn't bother to even check.

Apia resurrected 06-17-2020 12:36 AM

I was surprised by the supreme court decision and it made me a bit happy that not everyone is a monster.

SpareBen 06-17-2020 08:16 AM

I got the impression Mike is in a strong place and his main concerns are out of empathy for how his news will affect others. As Keith implied, it's possible that some of the alcoholism in this family may be caused by repressing secrets. Who knows what experiences others may have had or what healing might ultimately ensue? Another concern for me is that someone who would do this to a kid as a teenager has the possibility of developing some darker desires, and revealing the abuse could end up being protection for other children.

N8* 06-17-2020 09:42 AM

Absolutely not
Word power and now names have action Peoples

shoebootie 06-17-2020 12:57 PM

I was absolutely floored by Mike's situation, as I could have written the exact letter almost. Being abused by the teen son of our close family friend from a young age. Our parents were close friends, the two families would even vacation together. I'd blocked it out of my memory for years, not wanting to say anything to my family, alcoholic mom & dad who will do something rash. He'd beat the shit out of my aunt's boyfriend when he found out that guy was beating her.

My father died, my alcoholic mother died. Statute of Limitations had well passed. I don't care about hurting the abuser's family, so I reached out to them on FB, engaged in casual banter first before I hit them with the "your son fucking raped me" news. Told them the details, to keep him away from kids, and then I blocked them all. I needed no further commentary from them, as it wasn't up for debate. I'd felt some sense of relief/closure for having gotten it out there.

Mike, I'm sorry you went through this. You're not alone, and your need to want to protect others is still so admirable despite everything you endured. You needed protecting and didn't get it. I'm so sorry.

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