Boys Vs Girls

Scumhook · 03-21-2014, 12:55 AM

Guidelines interacting with Mormons:

Tell them that you think Jodi Arias was sent by Obama to spread HIV and murder Mormons with anal sex.

Tell them that you thought the movie Orgazmo was accurate.

Sneak drugs into snacks for missionaries.

Go to your local Mormon church on the first Sunday of the month, crash their Fast'N'Testimony Meetin', take the mic, and speak passionately about the doctrine of Cthulhu, and how He is your personal savior.

Find the Mormon temple near you and go to the visitor's center. Flirt with the Mormon girl sent to convert you to Mormonism while your girlfriend puts a BIOS password on their genealogy computer. Lulz are sure to ensue.

Convert to Mormonism, and get an assignment teaching Sunday School to lolis. Bring pedobear into your curriculum. Lulz and the party van guaranteed!

Join the Mormon Church, tell the local bishop that you never fap so you can get a Temple Recommend (the paper that says you're not a fapper), go to the Temple to do baptisms for teh dead, taek a shit in teh big hot tub they use to summon the dead, and make them Mormons.

Reconvert Mormons: Passionately tell Mormons you meet that it was the Elohim (an alien civilization) that met Joseph Smith in the Sacred Grove. Tell them that the Elohim have selected a new prophet on Earth, named Raël. Tell them you have scientific proof (glowing silver tablets). When in doubt, remember, Mormons are gullible by definition. This may result in missionaries leaving the mission.

If you live in California, walk up to a Mormon and tell them you're gay, that you find Mormon underwear a turn-on and you hope that gay marriage is taught in schools.

Ask them why they believe Jesus and Satan are brothers, watch them deny the whole thing, then point them to their own doctrine and let them know they're going to Hell for ignoring it

Luna · 03-21-2014, 12:56 AM

1226bhj

Scumhook · 03-21-2014, 12:58 AM

1228bigheadjob

campy · 03-21-2014, 08:58 AM

1226

campy · 03-21-2014, 08:59 AM

it's bloody dead in here.
Paratrooper, are you sulking?

Barker · 03-21-2014, 11:53 AM

1228

Scummy. That made me lol.

WSEIII · 03-21-2014, 02:53 PM

1230

campy · 03-21-2014, 04:37 PM

1228

campy · 03-21-2014, 04:48 PM

I am drinking cosmos bitches!

campy · 03-21-2014, 05:01 PM

Scum,
I was ignorant of the mormon ways, i feel enriched

03-21-2014, 12:55 AM	#52171 (permalink)
Scumhook Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Uranus Posts: 19,798	Guidelines interacting with Mormons: Tell them that you think Jodi Arias was sent by Obama to spread HIV and murder Mormons with anal sex. Tell them that you thought the movie Orgazmo was accurate. Sneak drugs into snacks for missionaries. Go to your local Mormon church on the first Sunday of the month, crash their Fast'N'Testimony Meetin', take the mic, and speak passionately about the doctrine of Cthulhu, and how He is your personal savior. Find the Mormon temple near you and go to the visitor's center. Flirt with the Mormon girl sent to convert you to Mormonism while your girlfriend puts a BIOS password on their genealogy computer. Lulz are sure to ensue. Convert to Mormonism, and get an assignment teaching Sunday School to lolis. Bring pedobear into your curriculum. Lulz and the party van guaranteed! Join the Mormon Church, tell the local bishop that you never fap so you can get a Temple Recommend (the paper that says you're not a fapper), go to the Temple to do baptisms for teh dead, taek a shit in teh big hot tub they use to summon the dead, and make them Mormons. Reconvert Mormons: Passionately tell Mormons you meet that it was the Elohim (an alien civilization) that met Joseph Smith in the Sacred Grove. Tell them that the Elohim have selected a new prophet on Earth, named Raël. Tell them you have scientific proof (glowing silver tablets). When in doubt, remember, Mormons are gullible by definition. This may result in missionaries leaving the mission. If you live in California, walk up to a Mormon and tell them you're gay, that you find Mormon underwear a turn-on and you hope that gay marriage is taught in schools. Ask them why they believe Jesus and Satan are brothers, watch them deny the whole thing, then point them to their own doctrine and let them know they're going to Hell for ignoring it Barker likes this. __________________
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03-21-2014, 12:56 AM	#52172 (permalink)
Luna Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Texas Posts: 15,630	1226bhj
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03-21-2014, 12:58 AM	#52173 (permalink)
Scumhook Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Uranus Posts: 19,798	1228bigheadjob
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03-21-2014, 08:58 AM	#52174 (permalink)
campy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 11,868	1226
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03-21-2014, 08:59 AM	#52175 (permalink)
campy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 11,868	it's bloody dead in here. Paratrooper, are you sulking?
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03-21-2014, 11:53 AM	#52176 (permalink)
Barker Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: I live in the heart of Mormondom, Provo UT. Posts: 1,256	1228 Scummy. That made me lol. Scumhook likes this.
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03-21-2014, 02:53 PM	#52177 (permalink)
WSEIII Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Nebraska Posts: 1,200	1230
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03-21-2014, 04:37 PM	#52178 (permalink)
campy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 11,868	1228
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03-21-2014, 04:48 PM	#52179 (permalink)
campy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 11,868	I am drinking cosmos bitches! Scumhook likes this.
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03-21-2014, 05:01 PM	#52180 (permalink)
campy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 11,868	Scum, I was ignorant of the mormon ways, i feel enriched Scumhook likes this.
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