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Old 02-26-2010, 05:24 PM   #91 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by djoh615893 View Post
Granted, and you have to bring her chocolates, then hand-feed her them one at a time while she masturbates to pictures of you and grunts like a wild boar.

I wish that retarded bosses would become Darwin award statistics
granted, but they take you with them

i wish that i had the complete box set of the walking dead tv show
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Old 02-27-2010, 04:17 AM   #92 (permalink)
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i wish i had a bottomless bag of buttered movie popcorn close by at all times.
Granted, but you get fat and butter clogs you're arteries and you constantly reek of popcorn. You die fat and alone.

I wish the tsunami that is scheduled to hit Hawaii tomorrow is downgraded so that no one is hurt. Corrupt that, I dare you.
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:28 AM   #93 (permalink)
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Granted, but you get fat and butter clogs you're arteries and you constantly reek of popcorn. You die fat and alone.

I wish the tsunami that is scheduled to hit Hawaii tomorrow is downgraded so that no one is hurt. Corrupt that, I dare you.
It gets downgraded, and the tsunami doesn't hurt anyone. The barriers built by the shore get knocked down during the resulting party and you're blamed for carnage that ensues

I wish my fat, lazy leech of an ex-wife would die from painful diabtetes complications.
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:48 AM   #94 (permalink)
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Good news. She just did. Bad news, you have the same condition.

I wish I could get over my ex, once and for all.
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:52 AM   #95 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by djoh615893 View Post
It gets downgraded, and the tsunami doesn't hurt anyone. The barriers built by the shore get knocked down during the resulting party and you're blamed for carnage that ensues

I wish my fat, lazy leech of an ex-wife would die from painful diabtetes complications.
granted, but first she gets thin, sexy, and rich and you want her back, but she dies and your heart is broken for wishing for her death. oh ya i also send you a dvd of me banging her, as she talks about your small dick.

i wish alexandra would turn into a pothead and chill out.

Last edited by i'minu; 02-27-2010 at 09:54 AM. Reason: spelling of name
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Old 02-27-2010, 05:13 PM   #96 (permalink)
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She does, but then she moves on to harder drugs, becomes a meth addict and eventually ruins her life and overdoses. Asshole.

I wish I were a real boy.
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Old 02-27-2010, 05:23 PM   #97 (permalink)
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Granted! But as a real boy, you have to attend real choir practice at real Catholic church. Come the end of a rousing chorus of Come All Ye Faithful, Father O'Malley takes you in the back and ..... now you're a real man, albeit with a lifetime of nightmares and fear of priests.

I wish it would stop snowing in England.
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Old 02-27-2010, 05:50 PM   #98 (permalink)
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they eliminate him and you in the same hand.

i wish i had a 4.0 in college.
Granted but it is from DeVry University and no one gives a shit.

I wish I had money and time to travel the world.
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Old 02-27-2010, 05:53 PM   #99 (permalink)
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You do, but a nuclear war destroyed pretty much everything you care to see. But at least you'll maybe pick up a pebble that once was part of the Eiffel Tower!

I wish I didn't have to shave.
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Old 02-27-2010, 06:24 PM   #100 (permalink)
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You do, but a nuclear war destroyed pretty much everything you care to see. But at least you'll maybe pick up a pebble that once was part of the Eiffel Tower!

I wish I didn't have to shave.
Granted, but now you have to have an enema in order to take a shit.



I wish I had unlimited frequent flier miles.
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