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Old 01-06-2010, 12:16 PM   #51 (permalink)
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Granted, but somehow you survived, and you're fucking lonely with no food, water, or sustainable resources.

I wish I really knew whether diamonds are a girl's best friend.
Granted. You find out that actually everyone but you is a girl's best friend.


I wish I had a harmonica.
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Old 01-06-2010, 03:02 PM   #52 (permalink)
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Granted. You find out that actually everyone but you is a girl's best friend.


I wish I had a harmonica.
its a plastic play harmonica

i wish they came out with a new awesome zombie movie every two days
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Old 01-06-2010, 04:08 PM   #53 (permalink)
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its a plastic play harmonica

i wish they came out with a new awesome zombie movie every two days
They did, but they're only available online, and when you try to watch them, you end up downloading the mother of all viruses, thus destroying your computer.

I wish rap didn't suck.
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Old 01-06-2010, 04:12 PM   #54 (permalink)
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They did, but they're only available online, and when you try to watch them, you end up downloading the mother of all viruses, thus destroying your computer.

I wish rap didn't suck.
Granted. But now rap blows.


I wish I had some pita bread.
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Old 01-06-2010, 05:22 PM   #55 (permalink)
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I wish I had some pita bread.
Granted, but you are also deathly allergic to it.

I wish I was getting laid every night
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Old 01-06-2010, 05:29 PM   #56 (permalink)
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Granted, but you are also deathly allergic to it.

I wish I was getting laid every night
Granted. But the only person you're allowed to sleep with is your mother.

I wish I had a puppy.
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Old 01-06-2010, 06:16 PM   #57 (permalink)
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I wish I had a puppy.
but it turns out to be a puppy that was used extensively for make-up and perfume testing.

I wish that weed was even better than it already is.
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Old 01-06-2010, 06:20 PM   #58 (permalink)
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Your wish was greatly misinterpreted and now your home is completely covered in weeds, but from the yard. It attached like ivy, and you're trapped.

I wish I hadn't looked at the side of my french fry container and saw just how many calories I was consuming at that moment.
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Old 01-06-2010, 06:25 PM   #59 (permalink)
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I wish I hadn't looked at the side of my french fry container and saw just how many calories I was consuming at that moment.
Granted but you are now also blind

I wish I had a new baseball glove
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Old 01-06-2010, 11:13 PM   #60 (permalink)
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You recieve a new glove from Antonio Alfonseca, but find out you don't have the number of fingers to fit the glove.

I wish I could breathe under water with no scuba gear.
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