Fuck on the First Date?

[Rufio]

Originally Posted by violachick8

As a recently single gal I've been trying to figure out the rules of dating and whatnot. Its been surprisingly more difficult than I initially thought. Thusly I am wondering when is it a good idea to fuck if you really really like somebody? Is the first date too soon if you want something more possibly (relationship wise) to happen eventually? The thing that brought this up is that I had skype sex with a guy I met on OkCupid after talking to him for about 5 hours on Friday. We made a date for yesterday and he canceled. My roommate is convinced that the reason he canceled is because he already got what he wanted. I had a fun time and I dont regret what I did at all.I am just sort of left wondering whats the best course of action in general and did I fuck up in this situation specifically?

team cheese

[ssgtballard]

I would love to agree with everyone here and say go with your gut but thats not how the world works. First we all have hang up and many are surrouding sex and how we think of people. Getting sex the first date usually throws us into the old whore thought processes. Yes its what I wanted but now you are the girl I wouldn't bring home to mom. Second I am man and I need to chase a bit. Yes its a game and I don't conciously want to play them but I'm built to persue and if I dont have to chase you a bit I lose interest.

If he's pretty and you just want to fulfill a need then go for it, and maybe you'll find someone who will be want something more. If your shooting for a long term relationship than make him chase you and your more likely to go for the distance.

I've been married for 13 years and we had sex about two weeks in so I'm not saying wait forever but my personal hang ups probably would have killed the relationship if it had been any sooner.

[scotticus]

Originally Posted by ssgtballard

I would love to agree with everyone here and say go with your gut but thats not how the world works. First we all have hang up and many are surrouding sex and how we think of people. Getting sex the first date usually throws us into the old whore thought processes. Yes its what I wanted but now you are the girl I wouldn't bring home to mom. Second I am man and I need to chase a bit. Yes its a game and I don't conciously want to play them but I'm built to persue and if I dont have to chase you a bit I lose interest.

If he's pretty and you just want to fulfill a need then go for it, and maybe you'll find someone who will be want something more. If your shooting for a long term relationship than make him chase you and your more likely to go for the distance.

I've been married for 13 years and we had sex about two weeks in so I'm not saying wait forever but my personal hang ups probably would have killed the relationship if it had been any sooner.

I agree with this guy. We all have hang up. Conciously or otherwise. You don't want to fuck up someone who will be want something more.


borat-high-five.jpg

Old whore thought processes.... niiiiiiiiiiceee!!!!!!!!

[alannanana]

I've found myself in a very familiar situation. This dude and myself have been talking on and off for a few months. He'll come around now and then and invite me to hang out although it has yet to work out given our schedules. Instead, we'll Skype-sex. He's good looking and I'm a horny broad so it works well. History will repeat itself and the next time I will hear from him is when he wants to get his dick wet, virtually or IRL. It is what it is. That's been the definition of our 'relationship' since the beginning and I wrote him off as boo material long, long ago.

This guy sounds like a dud anyway. There are so many cuties on OkCupid for a pretty girl like you. Fuck some, date some, ignore some... it's all part of the game, my dear.

[jacey.ATX]

Originally Posted by ssgtballard

I would love to agree with everyone here and say go with your gut but thats not how the world works. First we all have hang up and many are surrouding sex and how we think of people. Getting sex the first date usually throws us into the old whore thought processes. Yes its what I wanted but now you are the girl I wouldn't bring home to mom. Second I am man and I need to chase a bit. Yes its a game and I don't conciously want to play them but I'm built to persue and if I dont have to chase you a bit I lose interest.

If he's pretty and you just want to fulfill a need then go for it, and maybe you'll find someone who will be want something more. If your shooting for a long term relationship than make him chase you and your more likely to go for the distance.

THIS.

I agree that if you really like someone, you should wait. I know it sounds old-fashioned, but
even when the guy is totally into you on the date, often that changes if he gets his rocks off too soon. It's unfair and lame, but in a lot of cases, it just happens that way and the guy can't even help it. I think it's biological or something.

I've learned my lesson before: sex on the first date won't necessarily kill a relationship, but it can. And when it does, it's really, really awful. So, I say, better to be safe than sorry. If you really like someone, watch your alcohol intake, make plans for date 2 before the end of date 1, and try to keep it in your pants for at least a week, or 3 dates. It's not always easy, but it beats being rejected for fucking someone.

Of course, if you don't want to keep dating the guy, and you don't care what he thinks, go ahead and get yours. Just be safe.

[picard102]

I like chicks who fuck on the first date. I dont think that's a crazy response to hear from a guy. But it get's so much nonsense out of the way. Every girl I've dated long term fucked me on the first date. So it's worked out for everyone.

[blackpussy]

Originally Posted by Rhian

This.

I say, Fuckety-fuck-fuck-FUCK! If you want it, get it... if not, don't! If someone thinks you're a "whore" cause you want some fun too? Fuck em in the face I say!

[EastTexas]

Everyone's different, do it when you want to.
Personally I don't think you should date someone and then later find out if you are sexually compatible. Have sex first and from that decide if you want to date.

[benjita]

I think it also depends on how much you know the person. If you're talking to them for a couple weeks before your first date, then sex really isn't that much of a "whore" thing. If you just started talking to them that day, then it's probably too early.

Most of the chicks I talk to, I pretty much know if they meet one standard of dating, friendship, before I even meet them. The meeting really is to see if we're attracted to each other by that time. The one that I'm currently seeing, it's turned into more of a "hang out" thing, as I don't think she's really that into me. The one I fucked on the first date, everything about the sex and the cuddling and the afterglow was just wrong. Sure I was attracted to her at first, but...

I totally get what ssgtballard is saying. There is something to "the game". But I'm really a "go with the flow" person. If she's willing then I go for it. If she's not, then I don't push it. I'm not here to make judgments, I'm here to enjoy your company. If that means sex, then awesome, if that means the date ends with a hug, okay too.

[the_eD]

Give him that becky.