I Have A Problem With Alcohol.

[Dean from Australia]

Yesterday I got drunk. I got really drunk. I got so drunk that at some point I lost about 7 hours.

During this time, I said some things to my serioso and my kids that are, quite frankly, fucking unacceptable. They don't bare repeating here, partly because I'm too ashamed to repeat them.

I woke up at around 5am this morning, unable to recall what I said and did and it scared the fucking shit out of me.

I don't drink regularly. Once a week mostly - usually on a Saturday afternoon. I have a few quiet beers at home, after I've faffed about in the garden. Usually, I'm restrained enough to stop but occasionally I'll let loose and have one too many. Then I become an arsehole.
Recently, at social gatherings, I've done it more and more and it's getting out of hand. The tipping point came yesterday.

I don't have an off switch when it comes to slowing down and it is now becoming a big problem.

My family couldn't even look at me this morning and I don't blame them.

So, I made the decision this morning and told my family that I am giving up drinking. I can't handle myself with alcohol and I fear that if I allow myself to drink again I won't be able to control myself.

But I'm scared that I won't be able to control myself - that I won't be able to stick to my commitment. That I am a weak person.

What do I do now?

[TheSage]

Wow Dean, that is heavy and rough. I do not know your whole situation so I do not want to act like I know everything you are thinking. I have, though, known many people who at some point realized alcohol is a problem for them.

I think the best thing you can do right now, if you are serious about your commitment, is to look for an assistance program that works for you. It might be AA or something else, but having a program that will be there to give advice and encouragement could be what gets you through.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

[Scumhook]

Originally Posted by TheSage

Wow Dean, that is heavy and rough. I do not know your whole situation so I do not want to act like I know everything you are thinking. I have, though, known many people who at some point realized alcohol is a problem for them.

I think the best thing you can do right now, if you are serious about your commitment, is to look for an assistance program that works for you. It might be AA or something else, but having a program that will be there to give advice and encouragement could be what gets you through.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Welcome, and nice 1st post.

I sincerely hope you were drunk when you wrote it.

[Scumhook]

Originally Posted by Dean from Australia

What do I do now?

You're fucked no matter which way you turn. Stop drinking and be miserable, or keep drinking and ruin your life.

I know where you're at. I've been there, and still sometimes return. Seeing the pain on the faces of those you've hurt never really goes away.

What about switching drinks? I get waaay more arseholey on certain booze than on others.

[bw81]

They say the first step is admitting there is a problem, right?

Do what you got to do Dean. Big kudos to posting this, I wish you all the best pal.

[Scumhook]

Originally Posted by bw81

They say the first step is admitting there is a problem, right?

Do what you got to do Dean. Big kudos to posting this, I wish you all the best pal.

Well that was fucking helpful.

[TheSage]

Originally Posted by Scumhook

Welcome, and nice 1st post.

I sincerely hope you were drunk when you wrote it.

I wish I was drunk, I'm working....

[Scumhook]

Originally Posted by TheSage

I wish I was drunk, I'm working....

Some professions benefit from drunk employees.

E.g. Taxi Drivers, Surgeons, Catholic Priests

[TheSage]

Well, I am none of those. Not sure my "profession" would benefit if I was drunk, but it would not hurt. I doubt my employer sees it the same way though.

[Scumhook]

Originally Posted by Dean from Australia

What do I do now?

Another thing that might work is a bit counterintiutive, but try drinking more and more regularly.

Srs.

As your tolerance increases, you may find that you need to drink a fuckload to get really pissed, ergo less incidents...

Of course, you'll be perpetually hungover and your recycle bin will play a pretty tune of clanking bottles, but it would be worth looking into.

Everyone's chemistry is different, so this may not work for you.