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Old 06-19-2010, 01:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Imma mess

So I just got out of a relationship... and have no fuckin idea what to do next. Im always with someone. all of my friends have serious boyfriends. I have major issues with being by myself for even one day. Do you think it will get better? I just dont want to jump into the first guy that comes along again because im afraid of being alone. are you guys all messes too?

I join clubs... the FD and stuff. I live in a TINY town, but make amazing money so cant move. wtf do I do?
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Old 06-19-2010, 03:56 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I've always been with someone too. Split up with my girlfriend in April, and have been OK since. Just make sure you've got some long-term personal goal you're working for, and if your friends aren't cunts they'll make time for you in the short-term. Also, get really into computer games. That last one may not apply.
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Old 06-19-2010, 05:36 AM   #3 (permalink)
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yeah co-dependencies a bitch you never really grow out of, I wish you the best of luck. and where do you live ill buy a ticket tonight and be there tomorrow then youll only spend one night alone, not a day and a night.
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Old 06-19-2010, 06:26 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by firefighter_chick View Post
I live in a TINY town, but make amazing money so cant move. wtf do I do?
It's just money. You are young enough to start again at the bottom and wind up at the top somewhere else. Figure out what will make you happiest and go do it. If the money doesn't come, just marry well. Life is too short, you might be dead in a year for all you know.

In fact, pretend a doctor just told you that you are terminally ill and you have but a single year to live. With one final year to live, do you want to make amazing money in a small town, is that what makes you happiest? If not, move on, tumbleweed, the world's a big place.
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To be fair, to really follow Spooky's diet, you can't just eat chicken. You have to spend your days cleaning up after a slob roommate and night shivering like a rain soaked rage filled chihuahua about having to clean up after said roommate until you finally snap and yell at him. It should be called the Mexican maid diet.
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Old 06-19-2010, 06:28 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Listen to episode 1203: Reduce, Reused, Recycle.

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Old 06-19-2010, 06:28 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Get a pet.
Don't fuck it.
Find a hobby
Which is legal
????
Profit.

There's a saying "out of sight, out of mind" but when it comes to personal issues, it's usually something inside, something we're uncomfortable with that isn't visible...so I prefer the saying "out of mind, out of mind" - dumb I know, but follow me please...I think this works...

If you have something occupying your thoughts, you become to busy to become upset by what would've been bothering you. And as time goes by, you'll eventually realize, whatever was bothering you in the first place, isn't that big of deal, or at least isn't something you should stress about, because you've gone along well so long without letting it stress you.

By hobby, I don't mean "cooking" or "playing tennis" something that even if you want to do, you might only get to do so often....find something that would be a daily thing.

Like someone mentioned, computer games...that's not necessarily a bad idea at all, as long as you have the will power to not become a WoW fag or something...find a couple books you want to read if that's what you like, movies...or a bunch of tiny things, make more plans to get stuff done around the house...

The point isn't to find something new to do instead of having a boyfriend...
it's to be doing more things in your free time, so that in a moment where you might go "...man I'm alone..I wish I weren't"...you'd be too busy going "WTF that was a crazy episode of Columbo!".

Talk to friends, hang out with them, but not your couple friends...
like if you want to hang out with Janet, don't hang out with Janet and Brad, hang out with just Janet...you don't want to hang around people too often as couples if it's just gonna keep reminding you that you're not in a relationship.

And...when all else fails...come to us
someone here will be glad to cheer you up.
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Old 06-19-2010, 07:40 AM   #7 (permalink)
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It sounds like you've identified things you want to change. So you either do or don't.
I agree with Spooky a little. Money is a big motivator. Maybe look for jobs in somewhere you think you'd like to live and once you land the job move.

Small towns can suck for certain people, if it doesn't feel like where you are supposed to be living it's probably not.
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Old 06-19-2010, 08:04 AM   #8 (permalink)
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I'm sorry firefighter chick, I recently went through a pretty spectacularly painful breakup and I know how you must feel right now. Holy crap, I was a mess. Feeling lost is natural but knowing what you need to work on is a better start than most people have. I know it's weird seeing people in relationships but keep your friends close, it does get better.

It's never as bad as it seems and you're much stronger than you think you are. It's possible I took that from a comic book, but it's still true.
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Old 06-19-2010, 08:20 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spooky View Post
It's just money. You are young enough to start again at the bottom and wind up at the top somewhere else. Figure out what will make you happiest and go do it. If the money doesn't come, just marry well. Life is too short, you might be dead in a year for all you know.

In fact, pretend a doctor just told you that you are terminally ill and you have but a single year to live. With one final year to live, do you want to make amazing money in a small town, is that what makes you happiest? If not, move on, tumbleweed, the world's a big place.
+1
I hear AUS is nice.
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Old 06-19-2010, 08:39 AM   #10 (permalink)
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You need a gay male friend or some female friends who aren't. You said yourself that you "dont want to jump into the first guy that comes along again because im afraid of being alone," so don't.

Go on a three day camping trip completely alone. Think of it as detox. You're going to go bananas the first night, by the way. Deal.
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