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Old 06-19-2010, 07:46 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt View Post
You need a gay male friend or some female friends who aren't. You said yourself that you "dont want to jump into the first guy that comes along again because im afraid of being alone," so don't.

Go on a three day camping trip completely alone. Think of it as detox. You're going to go bananas the first night, by the way. Deal.
That's some thogal shit, right there.
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Old 06-19-2010, 07:47 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt View Post
You need a gay male friend or some female friends who aren't. You said yourself that you "dont want to jump into the first guy that comes along again because im afraid of being alone," so don't.

Go on a three day camping trip completely alone. Think of it as detox. You're going to go bananas the first night, by the way. Deal.
Camp somewhere simple - don't go and get yourself dead by exposure.
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Old 06-19-2010, 08:05 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Girl, you're young and hot. Stop being dependent on other people and rock your own badass self. Every girl goes through this, you're just a late bloomer. Being single is fun and rewarding and hard and lonely but you have to do it to be better in relationships. You'll be ok. time heals all wounds. And when in doubt, buy a plane ticket to KC and I'll show you a fabulous time!
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Old 06-19-2010, 11:31 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by firefighter_chick View Post
So I just got out of a relationship... and have no fuckin idea what to do next. Im always with someone. all of my friends have serious boyfriends. I have major issues with being by myself for even one day. Do you think it will get better? I just dont want to jump into the first guy that comes along again because im afraid of being alone. are you guys all messes too?

I join clubs... the FD and stuff. I live in a TINY town, but make amazing money so cant move. wtf do I do?
I just went through a similar situation (my 10 year SEVERELY CO-DEPENDENT relationship/marriage ended last October) and I had no idea what to do with myself. I promise you, it gets better. In fact, it gets great. I was a mess for about 5 months until I just said "fuck it, I'm better than this and better because of it". Just try not to fall into the first thing that comes along. It will end badly.
You just need time to figure out who you are. I'm just figuring this out now, less than a month from 30.
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Old 06-19-2010, 12:00 PM   #15 (permalink)
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At the risk of sounding clichéed and stupid, time heals any wound.

It's hard to believe that now, since the pain is fresh and everyone around you seems to be making out on purpose but it's true.

I tried all the remedies from heavy boozing and drugging to multiple partners.

They helped but mostly to keep me occupied until i suddenly noticed that the memories werent as painful as they were before, that i got a little less awkward and life was a bit easier.

Cut all ties with the guy, for the moment. You might keep a good relationship afterwards but not now, it would only bring you more misery. Dive into your everyday life, into your activities, creative stuff. Eventually start to hang out with different crowds. You'll get better and stronger. Promise.
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Old 06-19-2010, 12:41 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I know you said you live in a small town so maybe this advice wont work for you, but it may help others and it may be worth a try anyways.

Get on Do something, Learn something, Share something, Change something - Meetup.com find fun new/old hobbies and meet the people who are out there doing fun and interesting things with their time. It is safe, and always usually has a healthy amount of singles attending events.

I use meetup.com for scuba diving, Ultimate frisbee, hiking, ucher (card game), book clubs, writing clubs, and film/film making discussions. I saw one club was for people who go to a bar with a new board game and have a game club.

I hope this helps!
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Old 06-19-2010, 02:23 PM   #17 (permalink)
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First off FFC, I love you *hugs*.

1. I think you should move away from your town, you're bigger than the place and you know it. The money may seem great now but experiences are better. If you're meant to be there you'll end up there in the end but you need to have some experiences and adventures first. You're too young to settle! Moving elsewhere (to somewhere bigger) gives you more opportunities both job-wise and relationship wise. You really thing the love of your life is in that tiny town? Spooky has the right idea.

2. Don't waste your time with silly relationships that deep down you know aren't going anywhere (I saw your tweets, you seemed to realize this a while back). The more time you spend with the wrong guys the less open you are when a good one comes along.

3. Do something different. Like others have said, find a hobby, take a class, do something separate from your life right now. It could open new doors, introduce you to new people and gives you another part of your life that you didn't share with the guys you've dated.

4. Be alone for a while, look after yourself and have fun. You said you've always been in a relationship but why waste time with the silly goose relationships? Have fun, get to know yourself and what you like. Be independent and I think once you do this a while your next relationship will be better.

5. Come to Ireland... so many reason's I couldn't possibly go into but I believe this is the solution to your problems.
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Old 06-19-2010, 03:13 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I can totally relate...Unfortunately, I have no advice and remain a "mess" ha ha. Let me know what works for you though!
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Old 06-20-2010, 01:19 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Poor FFC
I think everyone has said it all.
Making good money shouldn't stop you from moving. People make life choices all the time, and sometimes making sacrifices can really aid your life in other ways.

I agree with Archicat, and also space out decisions, don't rush into anything.
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Old 06-20-2010, 01:27 AM   #20 (permalink)
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BITCH (said with mucho love-o!!) please.

There are about a babillion bitches out there who are way worse off than you...you're hot, adorable, young and sweet!

Fuck these dumb boys!

(I have nothing really usable to contribute, I just wanted to say you're hot and sweet! )
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