My wife just left me, please help

[Adamus]

Originally Posted by zappbrannigan

Someone set up this meet-up. It's a shame the earlier Toronto meet-up sorta fell through, let's definitely do this one! (We can also congratulate SnD for being 2nd sexiest KATG girl!)

Yes, please! It would be great. SnD deserves some drinks for being so hot and sharing her hotness with us!

[Dean from Australia]

Regarding the hard nosed financial shit...

If this is gonna go down the way I think it will then by all means gather your financial records together but make a solid commitment to lay off one another's pension plans, insurance, benefits etc.

Make no mistake, you want to get out of this as cleanly as possible and you don't want to fuck around trying to fuck each other over. Likewise with the house, sell it and split the proceeds 50/50. Have some representation if you feel you need to but remember this - lawyers are in it for them and not for you.

If you can, draw up some documents that set out some basic conditions (like those I've oulined above) and make copies for yourselves, each sets of parents and a trusted third party. The end game of this is to get out of this fucking mess as cleanly as possible so that you can start over Adam. Make no mistake, you think shit sucks now - I garantee you that it's gonna get a whole lot more worse for you mentally and emotionally in the coming months. You're gonna experience feelings of failure, of heart ache and pain that no amount of knob polishing from the hot chicks here is gonna assuage. You're gonna wake up at two in the morning alone and in tears and you're gonna need to be able to do that without the added pressure of your cunt ex-wife trying to take everything else from you.

If you're getting therapy, make that your priority right now and pour everything into getting your head and your heart right.

Everything else is just secondary bullshit.

[Enunciated Piffle]

Once love has faded; is there anything more terrifying than looking at your old partner/ soul mate and realizing they are a total stranger? It's fucking eerie. The definition of true horror.

[Adamus]

Originally Posted by Dean from Australia

Regarding the hard nosed financial shit...

If this is gonna go down the way I think it will then by all means gather your financial records together but make a solid commitment to lay off one another's pension plans, insurance, benefits etc.

Make no mistake, you want to get out of this as cleanly as possible and you don't want to fuck around trying to fuck each other over. Likewise with the house, sell it and split the proceeds 50/50. Have some representation if you feel you need to but remember this - lawyers are in it for them and not for you.

If you can, draw up some documents that set out some basic conditions (like those I've oulined above) and make copies for yourselves, each sets of parents and a trusted third party. The end game of this is to get out of this fucking mess as cleanly as possible so that you can start over Adam. Make no mistake, you think shit sucks now - I garantee you that it's gonna get a whole lot more worse for you mentally and emotionally in the coming months. You're gonna experience feelings of failure, of heart ache and pain that no amount of knob polishing from the hot chicks here is gonna assuage. You're gonna wake up at two in the morning alone and in tears and you're gonna need to be able to do that without the added pressure of your cunt ex-wife trying to take everything else from you.

If you're getting therapy, make that your priority right now and pour everything into getting your head and your heart right.

Everything else is just secondary bullshit.

Thanks, Dean. That's all very sounds advice. It's hard to think like that right now. I guess I'm still in shock. I just keep hoping that this is a bad dream that I'm going to wake up from, but clearly, that's not the case

I really hope that this doesn't turn ugly. I'm insanely hurt by what she has done, and I have felt anger at times this week, but mostly I'm just sad and scared.

Fortunately, our incomes have been pretty close since we started dating. We both make good money and I only make about 15% or so more than her. We've been really strict on splitting all of our mutual expenses (both large and small) 50/50 since day 1, so I think that will help...I hope.

My best friend is an ex that I was with for 4 years. We are super close and she's been my main support line through this. Somehow I doubt that I'll be friends with my wife when this is all done. I find that very sad, but I don't think she's going to make this easy for me.

One day at a time, right?

[Dean from Australia]

Definitely one day at a time Adam.

I am a little concerned that your main support is an ex. No offense but, if things get nasty, the potential is there for your wife to make accusations about your fidelity. I know that's harsh but it's sadly, true.

Your wife is no longer your friend Adam. If she and her inevitable posse see a chance to fuck you over, they will take it.

And I garantee you mate, she has a posse.

[Adamus]

My ex lives half-way across the country and the handful of times that I've seen her in person since we moved, my wife and I actually stayed at her and her boyfriend's place. She and my wife are actually good friends. So, I know that's not something I'll need to worry about.

I've been very cautious about who I have been talking to lately. I hate feeling this way, but there's no one here in Ontario that I really trust. I really hope that she doesn't turn everyone against me, but I know it can happen.

Tonight is really hard. I'm stuck here alone on a Friday night and I just imagine her out partying and having fun with our friends right now. I'm trying to watch TV and play some video games to keep me distracted. I'm very tempted to drink and/or smoke some weed, but I know that will likely make me feel worse.

I doubt that I'm going to get much sleep tonight. Maybe I'll take a sleeping pill so I can finally get some rest.

[Dean from Australia]

Originally Posted by Adamus

I doubt that I'm going to get much sleep tonight. Maybe I'll take a sleeping pill so I can finally get some rest.

Possibly a good move, though take it easy...

[Scat]

Best of luck to you, I'm sorry that you have to go through this. My relationship is on the rocks right now so I can sympathize a bit, but I won't pretend to know what it's like to divorce someone.

[DWarrior]

Originally Posted by Adamus

My ex lives half-way across the country and the handful of times that I've seen her in person since we moved, my wife and I actually stayed at her and her boyfriend's place. She and my wife are actually good friends. So, I know that's not something I'll need to worry about.

I've been very cautious about who I have been talking to lately. I hate feeling this way, but there's no one here in Ontario that I really trust. I really hope that she doesn't turn everyone against me, but I know it can happen.

Tonight is really hard. I'm stuck here alone on a Friday night and I just imagine her out partying and having fun with our friends right now. I'm trying to watch TV and play some video games to keep me distracted. I'm very tempted to drink and/or smoke some weed, but I know that will likely make me feel worse.

I doubt that I'm going to get much sleep tonight. Maybe I'll take a sleeping pill so I can finally get some rest.

Archer, if you haven't seen it yet.

[Luna]

Originally Posted by Adamus

From what I hear, "everything is bigger in Texas". Does that include the women's asses?

Some Texas ass for ya' I hope everything goes well for you.

I agree with Vi that partysuperparty.com is a good place to go when you need someone to talk to.