Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
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#71 (permalink) |
Junior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 25
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Blacks were bread to be dumb. Little white kids are pricks. Asians are always late. Put your fucking pack on the right rack, it's not hard to match up numbers. You're so sexist and you look like a pedophile. You look like a pedophile too and we're not pals just because we work together, you weren't here last year so you don't know what was going on last year. Just take out the retainer, the sound of you slurping your spit in the telex is disgusting! You're not hot shit. My job should be sponsored by deodorant cause most of our customers smell like hot piss before and after they play. Stop talking while I'm trying to give instructions. I am never working for canadians again. I quit.
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#72 (permalink) | |
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Kim in Boulder!
Posts: 90
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Quote:
On a related note, much like the recent KATG guest who constantly obsesses over everything stupid he ever did, and hates himself for it, I am now sober and thinking about stupid things I did yesterday while drunk. I wasn't that drunk, and I didn't do anything wrong. However, I will hate myself all day for drunkenly telling people about how breathalyzers work because it's fucking dumb. Also, ironic. Because I have this tendency, I'm usually in the middle of genuinely hating myself in a deep, deep way. I once got really really drunk and all night slowly felt myself losing the ability not to congratulate someone on their pregnancy, which I was also fairly sure was not a pregnancy because this person was drinking heavily at the same party I was at. And eventually I blacked out. SO...I will hate myself for what I probably said during that time for at least a decade, and I hope I never see that girl again. I hate me. |
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#74 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 392
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You know what bitch, cut the fucking passive aggressive bull shit. I'm sorry that at 27, I had the drive to gather 50K and dump it into a business and you, having worked there for FUCKING EVER, and being 36 couldn't get it together in time to buy it. Be lucky I hired you at all and you still have a job (for now). I also don't care what your current financial situation is. You already make too much for what you do here, but I felt obligated to honor your previous wage. Maybe if you hadn't gotten knocked up AT 35 FUCKING YEARS OF AGE to a guy addicted to lottery tickets who fucking steals from you yet you still sleep with, you'd have some fucking money. Or maybe if you'd quit working two shitty part time jobs and actually get something decent that has a regular schedule, you'd be able to pay your bills on time. In the mean time, bringing it up in conversation out of thin air is not going to make me give you more money, you already make more money than I do, because I dont make anything. How long do you expect me to keep your head barely above water to my total detriment? Your days are fucking numbered.
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Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
Check out the recent shows
Click here to get Keith and The Girl free on iTunes.
Click here to get the podcast RSS feed. Click here to watch all the videos on our YouTube channel. |
![]() |
#75 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: not in a house, not with a mouse, not here or there, not ANYWHERE
Posts: 200
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what was i thinking to agree to have 25 prepubescent, jackasses in my house on saturday?
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#76 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: I live in Southern California.
Posts: 3,055
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Shit. Now I'm worried that I pissed my boss off when I made a comment about my insurance going up and how I'm broke.
God, why do I suck so much?! I mean, I probably didn't piss him off because he even said that he thinks I'm not paid enough for what I do and that admin wouldn't approve a higher raise for me, so he probably is at the most annoyed that I won't quit bitching. Ugh. This is the kind of stuff I can't write elsewhere, circuitous, self-doubting rants full of self-pity and unfounded suspicions about why everyone probably hates me.
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