Gifts

[jorjo]

I went away last weekend with my ex - one of those things that was planned and prepaid before we broke up, was better as a couple than as a single, and he hasn't gotten around to replacing me yet ... - anyways - a couple of days before he started mentioning that he had something for me that was a surprise for the weekend. So, naturally I'm thinking he brought me something. I didn't even try to guess what it could possibly be as I know he can be kinda random.

The weekend comes around and we're standing outside smoking and he's like 'ohh - I didn't give you your surprise yet". He takes my hand, shoves it down the front of his jeans, says "Trust me" ..., looks at me expectantly and then says "What do you feel?" My first response is cock'n'balls ... but then it hits me - there's no pubes ...

So ... to recap - my ex "gave" me, as a surprise gift, his neatly waxed genitals and ass .... ummm ... WTF??? I mean, sure - we're still having ex sex but really ... WTF?

First off - this 'gift' may have been better received when we were actually a couple and, secondly - although I may have nicely suggested a trim wouldn't do him any harm I never once suggested he have the lot removed ... I kinda liked the hair on his ass

Tie that in with the strap-on he got me for Christmas ... 'isn't that really a gift for you?' ... (to be fair - I may have mentioned a desire to 'fuck him in the ass' - but I never said it in nice way hahahaha ... )

And on to the point of the thread ... what is the weirdest or most inappropriate or most surprising or most WTF? or most unexpected gift you've ever received?

[RoundAbout]

Girlfriend let me stick it in her pooper for the first time even though she had always been very vocal about never wanting to do that.

[DaHonay]

I would say don't look a gift horse in the mouth. A nice smooth cocknballs is the best for nomming.

[Grapist]

Originally Posted by DaHonay

I would say don't look a gift horse in the mouth. A nice smooth cocknballs is the best for nomming.

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange

[DaHonay]

Originally Posted by Grapist

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange

Orange is the SAFEWORD! When you have a cock in your mouth, you usually don't need the safeword!

[BrianAlt]

Jorjo, if you're going away with your ex and still having, "ex sex," I'm not sure what else you could expect.

If you don't want "the gift" that's fine too, cause he's your ex. Did you enjoy his lack of pubes on the trip? You can certainly stop "ex sex" anytime you want, and not enjoying his "gift" seems as good a time as any.

[jorjo]

Originally Posted by DaHonay

I would say don't look a gift horse in the mouth. A nice smooth cocknballs is the best for nomming.

ahh totally agreed - I know it sounded like I was complaining ... it was more that, even for something 'from' him, it was outta left field. And I do kinda miss his fluffy ass

Originally Posted by Lord of the Cock Rings

Too late, you win.

aww c'mon - it can't be that easy

Originally Posted by DaHonay

Orange is the SAFEWORD! When you have a cock in your mouth, you usually don't need the safeword!

umm ... everyone knows orange is the 'I'm just about at my limit' word and NOT the safeword. Let's not confuse things

Originally Posted by BrianAlt

Jorjo, if you're going away with your ex and still having, "ex sex," I'm not sure what else you could expect.

If you don't want "the gift" that's fine too, cause he's your ex. Did you enjoy his lack of pubes on the trip? You can certainly stop "ex sex" anytime you want, and not enjoying his "gift" seems as good a time as any.

oh, I enjoyed the 'gift'

And the ex sex has a time limit on it - I'm moving in to a spare room at his house in a couple of weeks and we have agreed to stop before then so things don't get awkward with the other flatmates.





of course ... neither of us actually believes that ...

Ok peeps - if you don't have WTF? gifts - what's the best thing you ever received?

[Keith]

This is so sad...

You expected a ring...

[John Galt]

Originally Posted by jorjo

ahh totally agreed - I know it sounded like I was complaining ... it was more that, even for something 'from' him, it was outta left field. And I do kinda miss his fluffy ass

aww c'mon - it can't be that easy

umm ... everyone knows orange is the 'I'm just about at my limit' word and NOT the safeword. Let's not confuse things

oh, I enjoyed the 'gift'

And the ex sex has a time limit on it - I'm moving in to a spare room at his house in a couple of weeks and we have agreed to stop before then so things don't get awkward with the other flatmates.





of course ... neither of us actually believes that ...

Ok peeps - if you don't have WTF? gifts - what's the best thing you ever received?

Hold it ... Let me recap a few facts:

You went on a couples trip with your ex who you are still sleeping with and are moving in with in a couple of weeks. Theoretically at the move in date you will stop banging, but neither one of you really believes it will actually stop.

You also enjoyed nomming on his freshly deforested gnads (but wish he had stopped the waxing at the international date line).

I think 'Ex' means something different in NZ than it does in the Northern Hemisphere.

[jorjo]

Originally Posted by John Galt

Hold it ... Let me recap a few facts:

You went on a couples trip with your ex who you are still sleeping with and are moving in with in a couple of weeks. Theoretically at the move in date you will stop banging, but neither one of you really believes it will actually stop.

You also enjoyed nomming on his freshly deforested gnads (but wish he had stopped the waxing at the international date line).

I think 'Ex' means something different in NZ than it does in the Northern Hemisphere.

haha ... yeah that's a pretty accurate recap

We're friendly and accommodating folk over here

I guess it's complicated ... I think how it works is we bang on an increasingly irregular basis until one or the other of us is getting enough from someone else ...

We're good together but not on a long term basis - he likes orange choc chip ice cream and I like hokey pokey - it was never gonna work out