3144: Free Will w/ Troy Alan

[Keith]

Critic negatively reviews Keith’s movie She’s Crushed and tweets the review to him; Keith’s shower calamity; Kevin Hart’s car crash; accidental circumcision; Hurricane Dorian; having a pedophile for a dad

Guest:
Troy Alan



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[Archimedes_Screw]

Fuck.

Yeah, my children are never going to sleepovers.

[Enunciated Piffle]

Originally Posted by Apia

So what do you do if you are born a pedophile?
What choices do you have?.

Old school society / problem solving would have killed these people. That’s how we dealt with predators. If we’re gonna be an evolved society, I guess we look for a solution?

Maybe science has the answer. If it is something you’re born with maybe they can identify that gene and remove it?

Troy’s brave. Maybe more people talking about it is a start. It’s gut-wrenching and heart breaking to hear tho. Everyone knows tho. It’s not a punch and a bruise. Sexual abuse is worse than taking a life. It is ruining that life, minute by minute, every day, for the entirety of that life.

Pretty dark. Yikes.

[Blitzgal]

I feel like old school society actually pretended this didn't happen and the topic was so taboo we just ignored it as it went on right under our noses. And in some ways, old school society felt it was normal for men to be having sex with children, they married them, kept them as concubines, were "mentors" to them (as in ancient Greece). It's modern society that we're finally saying this behavior is wrong and actually talking about it.

Edited to add: His discussion of anger really hit home for me. I was sexually abused by my daycare provider (a woman), and am one of the people above who answered "yes" to the poll. I spent a good 20 years being FURIOUS most of the time. It wasn't until around 7 years ago, age 35 or so, that I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and really learned how much of my anger was a response to my trauma and that it sparked up in moments where I felt powerless and was actually having a panic attack or an anxious response that for me immediately turns into fury.

I hope Troy gets to a place where he's ready to start working through where his anger is coming from, because it's incredibly debilitating to live like that, and when you in the midst of it you don't fully understand how much it's affecting all parts of your life.

[Lanfear]

Originally Posted by Enunciated Piffle

Old school society / problem solving would have killed these people. That’s how we dealt with predators. If we’re gonna be an evolved society, I guess we look for a solution?

I was fully ready to shout at you because that is such an ignorant take but Blitzgal already nailed it.

It's 2019 and you have been listening to KATG for ages - how have you not understood by now that child abuse specifically and abuse in general has and often still isn't punished? That's some wild levels of denial.

[Enunciated Piffle]

I voted yes on poll. I was in and out of foster care and homes until age 3 when I was adopted. I'm familiar with both sexual and physical abuse. Not sure I have to apologize for posting my thoughts on it.

That word 'debilitating' really nails it. You're crippled by this anger you think is normal. I used to justify it but now trying to deal with it.

I really liked how Chemda framed Troy's cop story. That was nuts but total white privilege. I liked how open and aware Troy was of this. But you can tell he's not still fully conscious of it.

"I wouldn't call it a fight." DUDE. You're not supposed to hit cops. That's not regular. Also liked the point, "Minor Assault - is still assault."

[SpareBen]

Curious whether any of the gays object to the idea of gaydar. Seems a pretty established concept and non-problematic to me.

[SpareBen]

Anyone else have a feeling they were abused but no specific memories? I have a bunch of probable situations where my parents were careless - time alone with priests / local theatre directors, etc.

[Blitzgal]

Originally Posted by Enunciated Piffle

I voted yes on poll. I was in and out of foster care and homes until age 3 when I was adopted. I'm familiar with both sexual and physical abuse. Not sure I have to apologize for posting my thoughts on it.

I don't believe you need to apologize. But I also have to respectfully disagree with you when it comes to how these people have historically been handled. Sure, you can come up with examples of family members killing or beating the crap out of someone who hurt their kid, but when we're talking at a systemic, cultural level...then no, I don't think that we historically have done much of anything to people who harm children. We can easily sit here and say, "child molestation is evil," and believe it when we think we're talking about some horrifically evil monster person. But when you bring reality into it, and you're talking about your babysitter, your dad, your teacher, your neighbor, we see that in reality we as a culture have done a very bad job of even TALKING about this issue, let alone punishing the people who do it. Suddenly the kids are questioned about whether they are lying or mistaken, and people jump to the defense of the accused...and that's only the people who actually ARE accused. There are plenty of instances where people steadfastly look the other way for decades because they simply cannot come to terms with the fact that someone in their life is a monster.

Shit, Chapelle's new special actually takes pot shots at Michael Jackson's accusers, and claims they should feel special that it was the King of Pop touching them, and asks the "Me Too" women what "their agenda is," as if it's not patently obvious that the agenda is to stop being assaulted.

[theguy2009]

If you tell him someone did something wrong and upset you he will bring them down. Unless your his sisters talking about his dad.