Keith and The Girl Comedy Talk Show

Show Notes

• I Know: Bank applications are making physical bank locations obsolete, but they can be awfully opinionated
• Gillette: Keith and Chemda survived a trip to Costco, but razors still cost a fortune there
• Buh: Keith is having a combination Superbowl/housewarming party and Trey wants to get him a corner donkey
• Cup: Chemda's mom is in town, and Lauren's newly-learned Hebrew impressed her but caused some confusion over double-meaning words and cake
• Fuckin' For Real: Chemda had a road rage adventure with a driver who honked at her, and now she's taking a good hard look at her life
• Octogarians: The only people Keith teaches lessons to are old
• Drive: Chemda is tired of her house and car, so now she's giving away the car as a bonus for whoever buys the house
• The Borrowers: Keith has been trying to get his bike back from Kyle for the past year
• Take: Bridget of the Squares is going to Keith's Superbowl party and bringing a quarter for betting on Keith's request
• Apprehension: Danny Hatch is interning for the first time tomorrow
• Critic: 68% of listeners think Steven Tyler's rendition of the Star Spangled Banner did not meet expectations
• Ching Chong: 57% of listeners believe Jesse wasn't racist in his linguistic assessments of other cultures
• Not Every Day: Pat Sajak has admitted that he used to do Wheel Of Fortune drunk
• Goofy Rape: Greg Kelly, co-host of Good Day New York, is being accused of rape
• Personal: Cynthia Nixon of Sex And The City is involved with a woman and said it was her choice because she's bi, and a lot of gay people got mad
• Pleasure Button: The most recent episode of What's My Name featured an in-process transexual and everyone learned a lot
• These Gays: Keith thinks the whole gay community is a bunch of entitled assholes
• Pronoun: Lauren questions if she'd want a sex change if people accepted her as a man the way she is

Show Notes

• Stress: Keith got sick with whatever Chemda had and didn't have anyone with healing hands around
• Yay: Keith got the apartment after thinking his broker needed more paperwork
• Unread Messages: Realtors and brokers don't close sales quickly even though it'd make them way more money
• Re-gift: Keith is having a new housewarming party and expects new gifts
• Too Happy: The Giants are going back to the Superbowl, and Adam Brown made good money betting on them and his bookie dropped him
• Proficiency: Jesse can speak any language by repeating one syllable
• Beautiful: Keith made a bet and won a sandwich of his own design on the menu at a South Carolina restaurant, and it ended up being a hit
• Vagina Only: A male porn star insured his penis for $1 million
• Weird: A priest was caught with his pants down at an adult bookstore in Baltimore
• So Nice: Jesse went with his wife to a porn store and met a very chatty salesman
• Distinct Looking: Jesse saw War Horse and justifies it with his $10 Sabertooth Tiger rule
• Pepper Spray: Extremely Loud And Incredibly Close is determined to make you cry
• One-Noted: Keith thinks The Help should win Best Picture of Forever
• Inspirational: The State of the Union address came on last night and no one cared
• Action/Adventure: The Navy SEAL team that took out Bin Laden went to Somalia and saved two people from pirates
• Cognac: Vancouver has a new $100 hot dog, beating New York's $69 footlong