KATG 2020: Pretty Pretty

With Carmen Lynch and Liz Miele – 50 Shades of Grey is a movie; Keith’s aunt dies; Bigfoot isn’t real; USPS; sexual harassment and Chemda witnesses a man punch, kick, and choke a woman; Insane Clown Posse is sued for sexual harassment; NFL’s Justin Black’s suspension continues and Ray Rice misses 2 games for beating his wife; 16 babies in NYC have herpes because of Jewish circumcisions; “Weird Al” Yankovic reaches #1 on Billboard July 25, 2014

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Show Notes

— Royals: Carmen Lynch and Liz Miele, both queens of the castle, are in studio
— Cover Up: Liz and Carmen are clueless about the mom-porn novel/upcoming film 50 Shades of Grey, right down to not knowing what the book cover looks like
— It Sounds Like You Cared A Lot: Keith’s aunt, who might be his godmother, died, and now he doesn’t know who’s left or how to ask his family that; Liz just became her nephew’s godmother
— Duh?: Scientists have finally broken their legendary silence and confirmed that there is no such thing as Bigfoot
— The System Works: Keith started his day in a great mood because he went to pick up a package from the Post Office and it was actually there
— Acrobat-caller: Keith saw a subway acrobat sexually harass a woman on the train and asks Liz and Carmen how they deal with creeps in public; Chemda talks about witnessing domestic abuse on the street in her neighborhood
— If The Glass Dildo Fits: Kid Rock’s glass dildo is being subpoenaed in a sexual harassment lawsuit against a member of Insane Clown Posse
— Sacked: Jacksonville Jaguars wide receiver Justin Blackmon has been suspended from the NFL for a DUI charge and having 2 blunts in his car but his punishment is far less severe than Baltimore Ravens’ Ray Rice, who will miss 2 games for beating his wife unconscious
— This Is A Tweet: Chemda met somebody who had 4 different Foo Fighters tattoos but was too shy to tweet at Foo Fighters to tell them
— Slurp: 2 more infants in NYC, for a total 16 in NYC alone, have contracted herpes as a result of rabbis sucking the blood from their freshly circumcised penises
— Alapalooza: ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic’s latest album is the first #1 comedy album in 50 years

Guests

Carmen Lynch

Liz Miele

Pictures

Liz Miele and Carmen Lynch

Bigfoot

The domestic abuser Chemda encountered

Hunter S. Thompson

Kid Rock

Insane Clown Posse

Dirty Dan, the defendant in the sexual harrassment lawsuit

Andrea Pellegrini, the prosecutor in the sexual harassment lawsuit

Justin Blackmon

Ray Rice

Ray Rice dragging his unconscious wife

Foo Fighters

"Weird Al" Yankovic

Coolio

James Blunt

Lady Gaga

Robin Thicke

Paula Patton

KATG 2019: Blurred Lines

With Abbi Crutchfield – The real Morgan Freeman and what celebrities are like; #FreePalestine; New York is America’s unhappiest city; the Cannibal Cop’s assistant; Ben Stein is a pervert; how to get out of a DUI; Sarah Palin receives a traffic ticket; Robin Thicke wants Paula Patton back; the Tupac and Rocky musicals fail; coconut oil July 24, 2014

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Show Notes

— A Great Guest, Period: Abbi Crutchfield, who appeared on an episode of the Tyra Banks Show about menstruation and adult diapers, is in studio
— Immaculate Conception: Abbi is a celebrity interviewer on a show for People Magazine, where she learned just how flirtatious and apocalypse-obsessed Morgan Freeman is
— #Informed: Dwight Howard and Rihanna both tweeted #FreePalestine before immediately deleting their tweets when people complained
— Concrete Jungle Where Dreams Are Broken: Abbi has lived in New York City, which was recently named America’s unhappiest city, for 9 years
— Cook-booked: A British male nurse, who helped coach the NYPD Cannibal Cop, was arrested for planning to kidnap, cook, and eat a 14-year-old girl he befriended online
— Seduce Ben Stein's Money: The very married Ben Stein sent a pregnant former escort $1,500 after befriending her and receiving sexy pictures, but the girl went public with the story when he said he wanted to ‘hug and kiss’ her
— Women And Driving, Am I Right?: A woman went into a pub after crashing her car and started drinking to cover up the fact that she was drunk, and Sarah Palin got a speeding ticket in her Alaskan hometown despite the fact that she is the former governor of Alaska
— The Album Is Called Paula: Robin Thicke’s plan to get his ex-wife Paula Patton back and retain some of popularity by making an album about her is not going very well
— Yo Adrian, We Kind Of Did It: A Broadway musical based on Tupac Shakur’s work is closing early after poor reviews, as is Rocky: The Musical
— You Can Masturbate With It, Too!: Abbi and Chemda talk about their experience with curly hair, and the gang extols the virtue of coconut oil

Guests

Abbi Crutchfield

Pictures

Abbi Crutchfield

Abbi and her adult diaper on The Tyra Banks Show

Lisa Nowak, the crazy adult diaper-wearing astronaut

John Stamos

Eric Stonestreet

Morgan Freeman

Rob Reiner

Ice Cube

Dwight Howard

Rihanna

The Washington Square Park snake

Tanya Ma and Ben Stein

Sarah Palin

Robin Thicke cheating in New York

Robin Thicke cheating in Paris

Paula Patton, Robin Thicke's wife

Tim Howard

Pink and her husband Carey Hart

Danny Hatch

Katharine Heller

Ali May

The new Expendables film has quite a few familiar faces. But enough about Stallone!

Brigitte Nielsen is looking good.

Grace Jones do be lookin' fine as hell!

KATG 2018: Flour Power

With Daliya Karnofsky – Vegetarianism; true love; hippies and the FBI watch list; The Purge: Anarchy and Deliver Us from Evil; secondary evil July 23, 2014

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Show Notes

— In For A Treat: Daliya Karnofsky, who brought cookies to the show, is in studio
— And She Bakes: Daliya incorporates her love of baking into her comedy and storytelling ventures
— No More Beige: Daliya and Chemda both went vegan/vegetarian for past relationships, but those lifestyles fell by the wayside after the relationships ended
— When You Know, You Know: 30-year-old Daliya is in a long-distance relationship with a 23-year-old actor in California whom she met a month-and-a-half ago, and she is planning to move there but not because of him, she swears
— Unorthodox: Daliya’s father is an ex-hippie who was on an FBI watch list for protesting the Vietnam War. He now works as a rabbi at a maximum security prison. Daliya talks about her own relationship with Judaism and how that meshes with the love of her life’s.
— Am I Allowed To Rape?: Keith reviews The Purge: Anarchy and Deliver Us From Evil
— This Week In Child Sex Abuse And Religion: An accused child molester is suing New York City because he wasn’t allowed to practice Wicca in jail; an ex-Christian morning radio host admitted to raping and kidnapping a child; Keith covers some more Bible quotes and offers his and his followers’ prayers to an old acquaintance

Guests

Daliya Karnofsky

Pictures

Daliya Karnofsky

Katharine Heller

Molly Knefel

Daliya's boyfriend

Jesse Joyce

Joel McHale

John Baylo, the ex-Christian radio host arrested for child sex abuse

Keith the missionary

KATG 2017: The Good Ol' Days

With Joe DeRosa - Entitled people; obtaining medical marijuana; sobriety and AA; expecting to die July 22, 2014

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Show Notes

— There Goes Joe’s Day: Joe DeRosa, who dropped his coffee the second he walked into the building, is in studio
— Age Of Entitlement: Joe is a curmudgeon but only because he is affected so greatly by the state of things in the world; he and Chemda both think that they are better suited for the 1970s
— Okay, Cracker: Joe grew up white despite a DNA test telling him he’s 20% African and 80% Middle Eastern, and he is willing to accept racial slurs for white people in exchange for the rest of the world calming down a little
— It’s Pretty Easy To Get The Weed Card: Joe lives in Los Angeles and has a medical marijuana card because of his ‘back problems’
— Automatic Fun: Joe started drinking again after a brief hiatus because sobriety is boring; Joe shares his disgust with the ‘functioning’ alcoholics who attend AA meetings
— So Why Even Bother?: Joe’s aunt died of cirrhosis of the liver, but she didn’t acquire it from drinking; Joe, who is a healthy 36-year-old, is afraid of dying young and runs down a list of young people who died too soon

Guests

Joe DeRosa

Pictures

Joe DeRosa

Frank Sinatra

The Exorcist

Brett Ratner

Louis C.K.

Doug Stanhope

Alcoholics Anonymous

Patrice O'Neal

Mike DeStefano

KATG 2016: Shake It Off

With Will Petz – Quiet Events and Quiet Clubbing; douche bros in a club; excommunication; the controversial professor’s comments on unconscious rape; James Garner dies; Israel vs. Palestine; Russia shoots down a Malaysian passenger airliner that Jason Biggs jokes about; Gisele Bündchen is still the #1 supermodel; Johnny Utah’s revisited; a police officer gets pizza pranked July 21, 2014

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Show Notes

— On The Green Channel: Will Petz, the genius behind the Quiet Events, is in studio
— Plugged In: Will talks about the other headphone events he’s masterminded, like a flash-mob party and a romantic play where the man’s thoughts are broadcast on one channel and the woman’s on another
— Is That Your Girl?: Keith recorded an episode of My Name Is Keith with Ali May, where he didn’t even have to yell at her but got her so drunk that he literally paralyzed her
— Handshaker From Way Back: Keith encountered a rude group of people at a party, and he was ready to throw punches
— It's A Girl: A 44-year-old Chinese man checked into a hospital with stomach pain and discovered he was really a woman
— Checking In With The Fans: KATG Tattoo #135 and a person becoming excommunicated from God for being gay
— Raping The Benefits: As it turns out, the professor Ari Shaffir mentioned was not saying that unconscious rape victims suffer less than conscious rape victims, he was actually saying that raping an unconscious person shouldn’t be illegal because they wouldn’t realize it anyway
— R.I.P. Jamie Gardener: James Garner, of Maverick and The Rockford Files fame, died at 86
— Future Soap Hockey Rink: Chemda’s parents are caught up in the crossfire of the latest Israel/Palestine missile attacks
— Too Soon: Russia shoots down a Malaysian Airlines passenger jet, and Jason Biggs causes an uproar joking about it
— Soccer’s Over: Another listener writes in to tell Keith how wrong he is about soccer, and Gisele Bündchen is the top-earning supermodel for 7 years in a row with $386,000,000. (She makes considerably more than husband Tom Brady.)
— Here’s What That Reminds Me Of: Will has taken people on organized tours to Johnny Utah’s for mechanical bull riding. Guess where this leads to...
— Cheesed Off: A man ordered 5 pizzas to the police officer who arrested him while he was being processed in the police station

Guests

Will Petz

Pictures

Will Petz

Ali May

Adam Brown

Emmy

Barbi getting her new tattoo

Barbi and KATG Tattoo #135

Ari Shaffir

Steven Landsburg, the economics professor and unconscious rape advocate

James Garner

The wreckage of the shot-down Malaysian flight in Ukraine

Cor Pan, who posted "If it disappears, this is what it looks like," before his plane was shot down

Jason Biggs

Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen

Michael Harp, the man who got extra jail time for ordering 5 pizzas to his booking officer

KATG 2015: Concession Stand

With Ari Shaffir – Keith’s concession speech; conscious rape vs. unconscious rape; poisoning the President; Manuel Noriega sues Call of Duty; the death penalty; Shroomfest July 18, 2014

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Show Notes

— Please Welcome Ralphie May: Ari Shaffir, host of Ari Shaffir’s Skeptic Tank, is in studio
— You Can Always Take A Layer Off: Keith is starting to wonder if he’s becoming the guy who hates every season he’s in; Ari talks about walking throughout various parts of the world topless
— Man Of The People: Keith wrote a concession speech that he prepared as a result of losing the latest polls; Ari gets in on the Keith vs. Chemda action
— Tape Culture: Chemda’s new solution for dealing with cat-callers is to film them, even though it is a literally life-threatening solution
— No, It’s The Same: Ari agrees with a college professor who argued that unconscious rape victims don’t suffer the same amount as conscious rape victims
— The Walking Dead: An actress who sent ricin-laced letters to Barack Obama and Michael Bloomberg received 18 years in jail
— His Reputation Is At Stake: Manuel Noriega, currently serving a 20-year jail sentence, is suing a Call of Duty game for using his likeness without his permission; Keith offers his services as a traveling executioner
— Fun Guy: Ari plugs Shroomfest, a weekend-long holiday in August where people take mushrooms

Guests

Ari Shaffir

Pictures

Ari Shaffir

Ralphie May

Anthony Cumia

Steven Landsburg, the economics professor who aruged that unconscious rape victims suffer less

Calise Hawkins

Danny Dunn, the still-alive Army veteran who was pronounced dead

Shannon Guess Richardson, the actress who tried to poison Barack Obama and Michael Bloomberg

Shannon Guess Richardson on The Walking Dead

Barack Obama

Michael Bloomberg

Manual Noriega

Manual Noriega in Call of Duty

Oliver North

Oliver North in Call of Duty

Lauren Hennessy

KATG 2014: Trigger Warning

With Danny Hatch – Forgetful guests; Moscow’s subway train derailment; Comcast apologizes; Johnny Utah sexual harassment lawsuit; the Running of the Bulls; the female Thor July 17, 2014

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Show Notes

— Did You Send Me A Reminder?: Danny Hatch, here in Frank Conniff's absence, is here
— Barbed Conversation: Keith got his haircut by a xenophobic barber who made Keith agree with his hatred for at least 5 different countries
— This Is Not Today's Poll: Keith believes that the Comcast retention specialist whose refusal to cancel someone's service went viral should be fired, but Chemda and Danny aren't sure that it would be effective
— Are You Fuckin' With Me?: An NYC bar that advertises it's scantily-clad female employees is facing several lawsuits for sexual harassment; Keith thinks the women should know what job they're signing up for but Chemda tells him that's the same as judging a rape victim by what she was wearing
— Bullshit: Police are looking for a man who took a selfie while participating in the Running of the Bulls because he could have caused harm to himself and others
— Transthormation: The Thor comic books will now feature Thor as a woman

Guests

Danny Hatch

Pictures

Danny Hatch

Frank Conniff

The Russian subway train derailment

Ryan Block and Victoria Belmont

Batman and the Joker

The Mamas & the Papas

Mackenzie Phillips

The Selfie Man

Male Thor

Female Thor

KATG 2013: Withdrawn

Cruise ship art scams; the top 10 airlines; Comcast customer service; listeners that want their forum name or posts changed or deleted; The Opie & Anthony Show continues without Anthony; free speech; the Cannibal Cop; Cooper, a 22-month-old, bakes to death in a hot car; Oscar Pistorius' bar fight; Kiefer Sutherland and Lindsay Lohan enjoy their beverages July 16, 2014

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Show Notes

— Two-For-Tuesday: A listener writes in about cruise ship art scams; a listener with Port Authority employee parents shares how much pirated booze is confiscated from cruises
— United Can Go Fuck A Horse: No American airlines were included in a survey of the top 10 worldwide airlines
— For Quality Assurance: A man trying to cancel his Comcast service recorded his phone call with a shockingly stubborn Comcast employee
— The People’s Court: A listener that goes by the name Scat calls in to talk about his desire to change his forums name, which he believes other KATG fans find unsavory
— Cunt Kicker: Opie and Jim Norton resumed The Opie & Anthony Show and addressed Anthony Cumia’s absence and termination; Keith and Chemda disagree about the limits of freedom of speech
— Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin’: Gilberto Valle, the Cannibal Cop, was freed from prison because it was decided that his well-researched plans to cook and eat his wife, among others, were just fantasy
— It Doesn’t Look Good For Them: A mother and father whose 22-month-old son died after he was ‘forgotten’ in a hot car all day both looked up how long it would take someone to bake to death in a car; the father also sexted 6 other women that day and even went back to his car during his lunch break while not noticing his burning son. Then it gets strange.
— Going Out On A Fun Note: Oscar Pistorius, still waiting to find out whether or not he’s guilty of murdering his girlfriend, got into a bar fight
— Drunk History: Kiefer Sutherland is featured in tequila commercials despite his obvious drinking problem; Lindsay Lohan was photographed stumbling about drunk shortly after she said she wanted to be known for her acting talent and not her drunk exploits

Pictures

American Airlines

United Airlines

Delta Airlines

Ryan Block

Jim Norton, Opie, and Anthony Cumia

Gilberto Valle, the Cannibal Cop, with his mother

Justin Ross Harris with his wife Leanna and his well-done son Cooper

Oscar Pistorius

Reeva Steenkamp

Leah Skye Malan, Oscar's new girlfriend

Lindsay Lohan

Kiefer Sutherland

KATG 2012: Complimentary

With Ophira Eisenberg – Candy Crush; vacation cruises; Alaska; whale watching and rock climbing July 15, 2014

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Show Notes

— I’m Sorry, Keith: Ophira Eisenberg, here to give Keith the greatest gift of all while hanging Chemda out to dry, is in studio
— We’re Gonna Need A Bigger Boat: Keith impressed everyone on the cruise with his NYC lifestyle and unorthodox approach to eating free food
— Piracy On The High Seas: Keith snuck booze aboard the cruise in a water bottle and used his instincts to avoid being swindled by the boat’s 'complimentary' snacks and shots
— Global Warming Is Real: Keith’s Alaskan sunburn inspires visceral reactions from everyone who sees it
— World Cup Denier: Keith chooses not to accept Germany’s World Cup victory
— #49: Alaska has such restrictive noise laws that the cruise ship couldn’t play any sound over its PA while it was close to shore; Alaska has to mine its own gas, ship it out, and then buy it back because it has no oil refineries; there are cities in Alaska without doctors
— Small World Domination: Keith’s wife Cathryn is at the World Domination Summit
— I Wanna Do Adventures: Keith recaps his shore excursions: whale watching and rock climbing
— R.I.Pitiful: Everybody hates when people memorialize their departed loved ones on Facebook for likes

Guests

Ophira Eisenberg

Pictures

Ophira Eisenberg

Keith's pirated booze

Keith's sunburn

A.J. Jacobs

The tricky snacks in Keith and Cat's room

Keith and Cat's whale watching map

Alaska

Keith's rock climbing excursion

Richard Branson

Lauren Hennessy

KATG 2011: By the Way

Keith’s wedding anniversary cruise; Germany wins the World Cup; Anthony Cumia fired from Opie & Anthony July 14, 2014

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Pictures

Keith's sunburn then

Keith's sunburn today

Ford Fairlane

1st place: Germany

2nd place: Argentina

3rd place: Netherlands

4th place: Brazil

World Cup finals in NYC

Oops

Oops x 2

Teachers Lounge

And he's off...

Patrice O'Neal

Robert Kelly

The Microsoft paper clip

American Airline Admirals Club Lounge

The lounge's shower

Royal Caribbean

Keith and Cat live it up

Cruise entertainer Marcus Terrell

Aldo

Patrice

Prince

What about Canada's 9/11?

Hugsy Malone under Emily's care

LeBron James

Ray DeVito

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