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Keith Malley New Comedy Album - A Future To Believe In

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KATG 2479: Pleading the Fifth

with Loyiso Gola – America’s PC culture vs. South Africa; citizens can’t view police camera footage; Colin Kaepernick is the most hated NFL player; the world reacts to Donald Trump; Cosmopolitan’s car for women; Chemda’s electroshock tests September 27, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Out Of South Africa: Loyiso Gola, ’the Jon Stewart of South Africa,’ in town to record his first U.S. comedy special, is in studio
  • — Freedom Of Speech: Loyiso doesn’t yet know if America is too PC, but Keith teaches him that you’re not allowed to say ‘retard’ here
  • — Police Car Emoji: Loyiso’s primary fear about New York isn’t terrorists but getting killed by the cops. North Carolina Governor Pat McCrory signed into law a bill that keeps the public from viewing or obtaining police video from dashboard or body cameras unless a judge rules to release it.
  • — #1: According to a new poll, Colin Kaepernick is the most-hated professional football player because of his National Anthem protest
  • — Zingers.com: Ahead of this election's first presidential debate, Loyiso is astonished that Donald Trump’s campaign has made it this far, and chalks his success up to America’s love of fast-paced sports and highlights
  • — It Comes Pre-Dented: Cosmopolitan and car manufacturer SEAT have come under fire for their blatantly sexist car, which they say was designed specifically for women
  • — One Flew Over The Chemda’s Nest: Chemda’s tumor treatment now includes electroshock testing. The new potential complication her doctors found could adversely affect her brain and muscles.

Guests

Loyiso GolaLoyiso Gola

Pictures

Loyiso Gola
Loyiso Gola

Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart
Pat McCrory
Pat McCrory
Keith Lamont Scott
Keith Lamont Scott
Colin Kaepernick
Colin Kaepernick
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton
The SEAT Mii
The SEAT Mii

Chemda and Hennessy
Chemda and Hennessy
Dr. Rosa
Dr. Rosa

KATG 2478: Deadlocks

with Tyler Richardson – Dating an engineer; Army Reserves and MPs; Charlotte and Tulsa’s dead black men media coverage; dreadlock hiring policies; Kansas State University’s blackface; Brangelina court update; Tyler’s violent mom; urine-repelling paint; husband sues Jim Carrey for giving his wife STD and drugs that caused an overdose; FBI looking into Weiner’s sexts with 15-year-old; America’s sexual city names; Chemda’s new scary test results September 25, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Strawberry Cough: Tyler Richardson, creator of a new comedy mixtape featuring a surprising guest turn from Christi Chiello, is in studio
  • — You Guys Are Totally Doing It: Tyler is dating comedian and engineer Ayanna Dookie
  • — 15% Off Wendy’s: Tyler used to be in the military but he rarely takes advantage of the associated perks. Tyler is a big advocate for basic training.
  • — Black Lives Matter: The gang discusses the recent police shootings of black men in Charlotte and Tulsa and the way they've been covered in the media. America's first national black history museum just opened after being in development since 1915.
  • — No But Seriously Black Lives Matter: It is now legal in the United States not to hire someone because they have dreadlocks
  • — Oh For The Love Of God: A white woman has been kicked out of Kansas State University after publicly posting a Snapchat featuring the n-word and herself in blackface
  • — White News: According to rumor, Brangelina’s divorce was initiated after Brad attacked one of their sons while drunk. Tyler can't believe Keith and Chemda hated Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
  • — Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's Madam Tussaud's wax figures have been separated.
  • — Sounds Hilarious: Tyler talks about being beat by his mom
  • — Splash Back: Philadelphia's SEPTA is testing out urine-repellent paint
  • — Funny Business: Jim Carrey is being sued by his late girlfriend's husband for giving her an STD and the drugs she used to overdose
  • — Surprise News Monday: Anthony Weiner may be facing charges for sexting a 15-year-old
  • — Ballplay, AK: The gang runs down some of America's most PG-13 city names
  • — Please Die: The latest edition of Chemda's Tumor Update brings some potentially bad news

Pictures

Tyler Richardson
Tyler Richardson

Ayanna Dookie
Ayanna Dookie
The shooting of Keith Lamont Scott
The shooting of Keith Lamont Scott
The Weeknd
The Weeknd
Former Kansas State University student Paige Shoemaker
Former Kansas State University student Paige Shoemaker
Brangelina then
Brangelina then
Brangelina now
Brangelina now















Jim Carrey and the late Cathriona White
Jim Carrey and the late Cathriona White
Cathriona's ex-husband Mark Burton
Cathriona's ex-husband Mark Burton
Anthony Weiner
Anthony Weiner
Former Missouri State quarterback Breck Ruddick
Former Missouri State quarterback Breck Ruddick
Luca, Breck's friend's dog
Luca, Breck's friend's dog
The damage Breck inflicted on Luca
The damage Breck inflicted on Luca

KATG 2477: Mr. Clean

with Mike Vecchione – Performing for the troops; hypochondria and how to beat STDs with soap and water; spying on you through your laptop camera; Buckcherry/Candlebox concert; Chemda’s scheduled surgery September 23, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — From The Couch To The Mic: Mike Vecchione, fresh out of therapy, is in studio
  • — Eastbound And Down: Mike is about to embark on a 2-week overseas tour to perform for the troops
  • — Wash It Off: 17% of KATG’s audience are hypochondriacs. Mike has a lot of anxieties and always used to think he had STDs. Keith tells you how to help avoid STDs with soap and water. Along with Mike, 26% of the listeners have tape on their laptop camera right now.
  • — Sorry?: Keith recaps his experience at the Buckcherry/Candlebox concert
  • — Tumor Friday: Chemda had to go in for more bloodwork and deal with humorless blood technicians. Her surgery will be in 2 weeks. Chemda confronts Keith about his behavior during her medical issues.

Pictures

Mike Vecchione
Mike Vecchione

Buckcherry
Buckcherry
Candlebox
Candlebox


FBI director James Comey
FBI director James Comey

KATG 2476: The Eagle Has Landed

with Ali Clayton – Child beauty pageants; sex and drugs as a child; autistic youths; period discoveries; JonBenet Ramsey murdered by her brother; Anthony Weiner sexts with a 15-year-old September 22, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — It’s Been Waiting For You: Ali Clayton, a recent Chicago transplant who has already been catcalled in NYC, is in studio
  • — Is That Child Abuse?: Ali’s parents enrolled her in child beauty pageants when she was 8 years old
  • — The End Of The Party: Under the tutelage of her crackhead cousin, Ali got into pot, ecstasy, her parents’ prescriptions, underage drinking, and sex when she was a teenager. This eventually led to her overdosing in an attempt to kill herself and being sent to rehab at 15.
  • — Rugrats: Ali works with autistic youths and adults who can sometimes be physically and sexually aggressive
  • — Dyslexia, Dyscalculia, And ADHD: Ali missed sex ed because she was in special education, so she thought her butthole was bleeding when she got her period
  • — 1996 Flashback: A team of investigators have concluded that JonBenet Ramsey was killed in a fit of rage by her then-10-year-old brother, which was then covered up by their parents. Chemda almost killed her younger brother when they were kids. Ali’s brother used to tie her up and leave her alone for hours.
  • — T Dog: Anthony Weiner knowingly sexted with a 15-year-old girl for months. The girl’s father isn’t pressing charges because she asked him not to. Ali, who was molested when she was 13 but begged her parents not to prosecute, recognizes this as a bad decision.

Guests

Ali ClaytonAli Clayton

Pictures

Ali Clayton
Ali Clayton
Reba McEntire
Reba McEntire

JonBenet Ramsey
JonBenet Ramsey
Burke Ramsey
Burke Ramsey
Anthony Weiner
Anthony Weiner
Huma Abedin
Huma Abedin
Hannibal Lecter
Hannibal Lecter
Kevin Bacon
Kevin Bacon

KATG 2475: A Curse on Your Family

with Stephen Spinola – Performing on hallucinogens; dabs; Photoshopping your face into porn; apartment hunting; winning and losing big in the the stock market; Chemda’s tumor; hypochondria; RIP Brangelina; high school teacher suspended being oddly inappropriate; tipsy tenured teachers; KATG poll results; Stephen’s new album September 21, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Acid-Washed: Stephen Spinola, co-host and co-producer of The Only One Tripping, one of the best shows Chemda’s ever seen, is in studio
  • — We Have Conversations: Stephen’s girlfriend gets nervous about how much he smokes. Stephen walks us through his process for smoking dabs.
  • — FuckStephenSpinola.com: Stephen Photoshopped his face onto porn actors
  • — Supernatural Trading Powers: Stephen has a degree in physics but he decided to pursue comedy instead of science, so it’s hard for him to get a well-paying job or find a good apartment.
  • — The Crash: Stephen has enough money in stocks that losing $300,000 in the market was bad but not the worst. He got the capital to start day trading after he got hit by a car and received $1,000,000 and a crooked hand.
  • — A Curse On Your Family: Stephen sends glitterbombs and invokes hexes to express his displeasure with people and businesses
  • — Wide Open: Chemda needs the ‘most invasive’ surgery to remove her now football-sized tumor
  • — The Former Mrs. And Mrs. Smith: Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are getting divorced after 2 years of marriage and 11 years together. Anthony Bourdain and his wife also separated. Ho-hum.
  • — Those Who Can't: A Canadian high school teacher is suspended from pay for a litany of inappropriate comments, among them telling one of her students, ‘lick me where I fart.’ One of Stephen’s high school teachers showed up drunk and physically harmed her students because she had tenure.
  • — Poll The Trigger: 31% of KATG’s audience immediately laugh when somebody falls. 82% think bringing Keith’s airsoft gun camping was appropriate. 9% would masturbate in public if it was legal. (Keith is in the 9%.)
  • — Joke Jams: Stephen’s new album of open mic hype parody songs comes out September 23

Pictures

Stephen Spinola
Stephen Spinola
Evan Jones
Evan Jones
How to smoke dabs
How to smoke dabs
FuckStephenSpinola.com
FuckStephenSpinola.com
Stephen's crooked hand
Stephen's crooked hand
Chemda at her appointment
Chemda at her appointment

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
Brangelina and their children
Brangelina and their children

The nice things Keith left out for Cat
The nice things Keith left out for Cat
Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston
Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston
Ottavia Busia and Anthony Bourdain
Ottavia Busia and Anthony Bourdain
Teacher of the year Jennifer Elizabeth Green-Johnson
Teacher of the year Jennifer Elizabeth Green-Johnson

KATG 2474: Bowled Over

NYC bombings; Chemda’s tumor update and hospitals’ bedside manners; Hillary Clinton’s death; 2016’s Emmy awards; Snowden reviewed; police threaten not to protect stadiums where football players protest; piss-poor service September 20, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Checking In: Keith was not injured in the NYC bombing over the weekend, but he’s upset Facebook didn’t even ask him. He also doesn’t even care about bombings anymore.
  • — Whoa, That’s Big: Chemda, who is currently radioactive, shares the results of her latest round of tumor tests and discusses the poor bedside manner of the hospital’s employees
  • — It Was On The Monitor: A local news broadcaster accidentally reported on ‘Hillary Clinton’s death’
  • — These Awards Are So Dumb: Game of Thrones and Veep were the big winners at Sunday night’s Emmy awards
  • — The System Is Down: Keith reviews Snowden, the #4 movie of the week, makes a bold prediction about the real Edward Snowden, and shares his feelings about the government. The head of the FBI encourages taping up webcams when not in use
  • — Born Free: The International Union of Police Associations says the Miami Dolphins don’t deserve police protection at their stadium if some of their players insist on kneeling for the National Anthem. Kid Rock is not a fan of Colin Kaepernick.
  • — Fumble: Keith brings us up to speed on his football rags-to-riches experience
  • — Happy To Serve You: Chemda and Keith complain about the service they received over the weekend
  • — Mr. Robot: Chemda drops another juicy nugget about her upcoming tumor surgery

Pictures

Ahmad Khan Rahami
Ahmad Khan Rahami
The emergency alert
The emergency alert

Chemda's breathing bowling game
Chemda's breathing bowling game
Chemda after radiation
Chemda after radiation
Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump
Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump


Rami Malek
Rami Malek
Tatiana Maslany
Tatiana Maslany
Jeffrey Tambor
Jeffrey Tambor
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda
Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda
Kate McKinnon
Kate McKinnon

Courtney B. Vance
Courtney B. Vance
Sarah Paulson
Sarah Paulson

The Last Week Tonight writing team
The Last Week Tonight writing team






Hugsy Malone and Xerxes
Hugsy Malone and Xerxes
FBI director James Comey
FBI director James Comey
Colin Kaepernick
Colin Kaepernick
Kid Rock
Kid Rock
Francis Scott Key
Francis Scott Key


Joe "The Ass-Eater" Flacco
Joe "The Ass-Eater" Flacco
Keith #1. Again.
Keith #1. Again.
Michael, Chemda, Hennessy, and Marisela on Governors Island
Michael, Chemda, Hennessy, and Marisela on Governors Island

KATG 2473: The System Is Broken

with Baron Vaughn – Grace and Frankie; Mystery Science Theater 3000 reboot; the audition process; polyamory; beauty and race; Chemda’s tumor update; therapy and your parents; laughing at others’ pain; memory lane with The Awkward Comedy Show September 18, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Nwabudike: Baron Vaughn, from Chemda’s favorite show Grace and Frankie, is in studio
  • — MST4K: Baron discusses his appearance in the upcoming Mystery Science Theater 3000 reboot and why there are so many terrible movies out there
  • — A Toe In Every Pie: Baron talks about moving from New York to Los Angeles to get into the acting business, and he walks us through the auditioning process
  • — Itchy McScratchy: Baron accidentally ate peanuts before performing and suffered an intense allergic reaction on stage. He’s also allergic to dairy, cats, dogs, and cologne.
  • — The Polyamorous Spree: Baron is inclined to pursue open relationships while his girlfriend would prefer to be monogamous
  • — We Are The World: The gang discusses societal perceptions of beauty and race
  • — Chemda Cancer Update: Chemda’s tumor is not attached to her heart but she might lose part of her lung. Her thymoma led to a terrible 24-hour bout of diarrhea.
  • — Conscious Competence: Baron goes to individual therapy with an ex-comedian therapist, and couples therapy, where he and his girlfriend work out their issues with their parents. Baron is making a documentary about the search for his birth father.
  • — Benign Violation: Andrea Allan can’t help but immediately laugh when someone falls. Baron explains the science of laughter.
  • — The Awkward Awkward Comedy Show: Baron goes down memory lane with his last KATG appearance and tries to explain Chemda’s tension with Marina Franklin

Guests

Baron VaughnBaron Vaughn

Pictures

Baron Vaughn
Baron Vaughn

Baron as Nwabudike "Bud" Bergstein in Grace and Frankie
Baron as Nwabudike "Bud" Bergstein in Grace and Frankie

Tom Servo
Tom Servo


ABBA
ABBA




Baron's peanut allergy face
Baron's peanut allergy face
Maria Bamford
Maria Bamford
Andrea Allan
Andrea Allan
Marina Franklin
Marina Franklin

KATG 2472: When in Rome

with Marga Gomez and Frank Liotti – Voiceover audition waiting rooms; juice cleanses and lack of taste and smell; Keith’s wife doesn’t get Keith’s social cues; NYC’s failed WiFi porn kiosks; Italy decriminalizes public masturbation; Gene Wilder was upset with Gilda Radner; redoing school September 16, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Showbiz Lovers: Marga Gomez, Frank Liotti, and their various relationship issues are in studio
  • — It’s Like Being In A Group Home: Frank sheds some light on a gross aspect of voiceover audition waiting rooms
  • — Juicy Fruit: Frank started a juice cleanse to lose weight and because he is in the midst of a medical issue that temporarily left him unable to smell or taste anything
  • — Darling: Keith’s wife is bad at covering for Keith when he doesn’t know someone’s name or isn’t paying attention during a conversation
  • — Organ Grinders: LinkNYC is disabling Internet access on its WiFi Kiosks because too many people are using it to watch porn in public. Italy’s Supreme Court has decriminalized public masturbation (provided you’re not doing it in front of a minor) thanks to the actions of one brave 69-year-old man.
  • — Everyone I Love Dies: Chemda very graciously informed Frank of her tumor before the show started
  • — Gene Wilder Truther: Frank lost some respect for Gene Wilder after reading his biography where he calls Gilda Radner needy
  • — Goals: The gang talks about how they’d act if they could redo school

Pictures

Frank Liotti and Marga Gomez
Frank Liotti and Marga Gomez

Matteo Lane
Matteo Lane
Rainbow cookies
Rainbow cookies
One of American Horror Story's bald circus little people
One of American Horror Story's bald circus little people
An NYC WiFi kiosk
An NYC WiFi kiosk




Gene Wilder and Gilda Radner
Gene Wilder and Gilda Radner
Veruca Salt
Veruca Salt
Veruca Salt
Veruca Salt
Chemda's tumor
Chemda's tumor

KATG 2471: Gun-shy

with Danny Hatch and Libby Phillips – Ultimate Frisbee; airsoft guns; being bullied; Team USA gymnastics doctor sexually abuses underage athletes; KATG poll results; Kubo and the Two Strings reviewed; Ryan Lochte attacked on live Dancing with the Stars broadcast; Samsung Galaxy 7 phones banned on airplanes and subways; an app that finds people to eat lunch with September 15, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Cohorts: Danny Hatch, king of eating dogshit, and Libby Phillips, host of Wrap It Up!, are in studio
  • — Extreme Frisbee: Libby regales us with tales from her Ultimate Frisbee days
  • — Gun Control The gang has issues with Keith's airsoft gun. A 15-year-old in Brooklyn brought a loaded gun to school on the first day of the year.
  • — Gilligan’s Island: Libby discusses being bullied in middle school
  • — Gymnastics Is Freedom: A Team USA gymnastics doctor is accused of sexually abusing the team’s underage athletes
  • — Sorry Not Sorry: 33% of KATG listeners believe Chemda owes Keith and apology, 88% think porn forums members are creepy weirdos, and 56% think NYC’s WiFi kiosks will work out
  • — I Hate Wonderment: Sully is the #1 movie at the box office. Keith reviews Kubo and the Two Strings.
  • — Making Waves: Anti-Ryan Lochte protestors rushed the Dancing with the Stars stage during his live debut on the show
  • — Feel The Burn: Samsung Galaxy 7 phones are no longer allowed on airplanes or in NYC’s subway because of their tendency to explode and catch fire
  • — Let's Do Lunch: Keith is not a fan of a 16-year-old’s app for finding people to eat lunch with in a school cafeteria, which was inspired by her year of eating alone in 7th grade.

Pictures

Libby Phillips and Danny Hatch
Libby Phillips and Danny Hatch
Ultimate Frisbee
Ultimate Frisbee
Keith's gun
Keith's gun

The BB stuck in Chas Tenenbaum's hand
The BB stuck in Chas Tenenbaum's hand
Former Team USA gymnastics doctor/underage sexual abuser Larry Nassar
Former Team USA gymnastics doctor/underage sexual abuser Larry Nassar








Ryan Lochte on Dancing with the Stars
Ryan Lochte on Dancing with the Stars
The anti-Lochte protestors
The anti-Lochte protestors
The Samsung Galaxy Note 7
The Samsung Galaxy Note 7
A hoverboard
A hoverboard
The app that lets you not eat lunch alone
The app that lets you not eat lunch alone
Pablo Escobar
Pablo Escobar

KATG 2470: Happy Campers

with Ahmed Bharoocha – Burma and Muslims; new Oxford English Dictionary entries; the yearly camping trip; Hillary Clinton’s pneumonia, Chelsea’s fundraising, politicians kissing babies; Huma Abedin and Anthony Weiner on the subway train; the new iPhone 7 and the exploding Samsung Galaxy 7 September 14, 2016

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Show Notes

  • — Stay Strong: Ahmed Bharoocha, who won’t change his name even after 9/11, is in studio
  • — The Kneeler: Ahmed’s mom is American, his dad grew up in Burma, and he was raised Catholic and a little bit Muslim
  • — Word: Yolo, gender-fluid, yogalates, fuhgeddaboudit, and moobs are among this year’s new inductees to the Oxford English Dictionary
  • — Never Forget: Keith and Chemda recap the high times they had on the yearly camping trip for Hennessy’s birthday, the date of which really snuck up on Keith
  • — The Clinton Corner: Hillary Clinton was diagnosed with pneumonia after fainting at the 9/11 Memorial. Chelsea Clinton is charging $2,700 for top-tier fundraising tickets at Penn State University. Keith takes a stand on kissing babies.
  • — The D Train: Huma Abedin and her estranged husband Anthony Weiner were spotted sharing a very awkward train ride together
  • — Hold The Phone: The new 'water-resistant' iPhone 7 will not include a standard headphone jack; instead, Apple’s new wireless earbuds will run you a cool $160. The new Samsung Galaxy phone is being recalled because it explodes.

Pictures

Ahmed Bharoocha
Ahmed Bharoocha

Camp organizer Xerxes
Camp organizer Xerxes
BlueApron.com/KATG
BlueApron.com/KATG
BlueApron.com/KATG
BlueApron.com/KATG
BlueApron.com/KATG
BlueApron.com/KATG
Hillary Clinton
Hillary Clinton
Hillary Clinton falling at the 9/11 Memorial
Hillary Clinton falling at the 9/11 Memorial
Hillary Clinton being escorted from the 9/11 Memorial after falling ill
Hillary Clinton being escorted from the 9/11 Memorial after falling ill
Donald Trump kissing a baby
Donald Trump kissing a baby
Chelsea Clinton
Chelsea Clinton
Anthony Weiner and Huma Abedin on the 6 train
Anthony Weiner and Huma Abedin on the 6 train
The iPhone 7 and the new AirPods
The iPhone 7 and the new AirPods

Dream Corp LLC executive producers John Krasinski and Stephen Merchant
Dream Corp LLC executive producers John Krasinski and Stephen Merchant

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