3658: Humans Being w/ MJ Knefel

[Keith]

MJ Knefel, né Molly, joins KATG after a way too long break and fills us in on their thought process regarding being transgender, the details of body surgery, being married to a cis man and birthing two children, and living in society.

Guest:
Molly Knefel



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[Apia resurrected]

I don’t have body dismorphia and am not trans but I would love to be seen as just “person” and not as female in society.
I understand what Chemda said and feel similarly.

[thirteen]

So nice to hear from MJ after a long time.

[Keith]

Real Women of Politics

[Apia resurrected]

I also don’t like giving my pronouns for the reason I said earlier.
In almost every context I think “why should it matter”.

Same with sexual orientation. I am in a very long relationship with Mr Apia and I’m happy. But to say that I’m straight wouldn’t feel right because I know I could be in a relationship with a non man, if live turned out differently.
But after 17 years in a hetero relationship I don’t know how else to describe myself. We don’t have an open relationship.
Flexible in theory? Sounds strange.

[Jay86]

I recently convinced myself that I could and should refer to anyone as "they/them" as that wouldn't assume their gender and ideally would no accidentally piss anyone off. However, Abigail Thorne in one video referred to it as "the coward's 'they'" and that that would take away the femininity that some trans women need/rely on for their identity in society...which...you know, makes sense also.

It's pretty fascinating how language (and society) is evolving around this issue. I guess I'm going to stick with "they/them" until I am told people's preferred pronouns and then use those instead. Until, I suppose, a better solution crops up.

Great episode, as usual. MJ has always been a fascinating guest, so interesting to hear their story.

[Apia resurrected]

Sorry, but what Abigail says is in my opinion too much. Of course, if I know someone longer and know this is something this person wants, ok.
But for example in an online meeting with 5 new people ( something very common for me , I work in a really big company) it’s impossible to remember how this people I just met want to be addressed. I can use „ they“ for everyone, and I’m 100% fine with being also referred as „they“.

[Apia resurrected]

Being respectful in a work context is something I absolutely want to do and I never want to disrespect someone. But assuring someone of their femininity is maybe a too big order in this context.

[Jay86]

I kinda get where she's coming from. At a time where transphobes, terfs and other nazis are denying them their right to even exist, not calling them by their chosen "she/her" pronouns is a bit of a centrist stance that plays into the hands of the haters. Anti-trans fucks are saying "trans women aren't women" so the least I can do is refer to them as "she/her" if that's what they want.

[XenoTitty]

All clothing is unisex if you quit being a little bitch about it