Merry Wrestlemania!

[shoogbear63]

It's the one day each year where we mouthbreathers rejoice like it's Christmas. Last year's post-Wrestlemania show awesome... I figure I could help out by breaking down the cards giving Keith and whoever's watching for the P!SP! a brief rundown of the card and stories involved...

1) The Colóns (Carlito and Primo) vs. John Morrison and The Miz (Lumberjack match). This will be alright. They've been feuding over the Bella Twins, so they'll be involved. This is a lumberjack match so they can make sure all the other wrestlers in WWE can show up on Wrestlemania (wrestlers don't get paid for the show unless they wrestle on it, Wrestlemania's the biggest payday of the year, so they usually find some excuse to get a ton of wrestlers onscreen at once) and a lumberjack match is where other wrestlers surround the ring. If Keith needs a bathroom break, this might be it.

2) John "Bradshaw" Layfield vs. Rey Mysterio - IC Title match - Layfield is claiming to make history at this Wrestlemania and do something that people will be talking about the next day. I'm pretty sure I know what the announcement is, but I have no intentions of spoiling it. There's not much of a story here.

3) CM Punk vs. Kane vs. Mark Henry vs. Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Christian vs. Finlay - Money in the Bank Ladder Match - Okay, this is where you get your $50 worth. Even if you're not into wrestling, this is probably the match you want to watch, they usually do some crazy shit with the ladder. The winner gets a world title shot at any time of their choosing. Expect Shelton, Punk, and Kofi to do lots of flying, bouncing around and some crazy bumps. Kane, Finlay, and Mark Henry are basically there to catch folks and get hit with the ladder.

4)Chris Jericho vs. Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat and Jimmy Snuka (with Ric Flair) - Handicap elimination match. Basically, the intial plan was for this to be Jericho vs. Mickey Rourke (who will be in the front row for this match, I hope he gets involved and his Jericho with the Ram Jam). Then, they were hoping to talk Ric Flair into coming out of retirement to wrestle, but he declined to wrestle. This was the backup backup plan. The question here is can an old as fuck Jimmy Snuka still do a body press off the top rope.

5) 25-Diva battle royal - This will only be worth seeing back they're bringing in some chicks from the past (so 70 year old Mae Young will be wrestling). This is my other suggested bathroom break.

6) Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy - Two years ago, Jeff Hardy's house burned down and his dog died (in real life). They recently wrote into the storyline that Matt Hardy burned down his brothers house, thus killing his dog. This is Wrestlemania.
* This is the second time people wrestled at Wrestlemania over a dead dog. Can anyone name the other? And I'm not counting the time that Big Boss Man cooked and ate Al Snow's dog. They wrestled in a Kennel in a Cell match, but not at Wrestlemania.

7) The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels - Undertaker is undefeated at Wrestlemania (16-0, I believe). HBK is "Mr. Wrestlemania"... so he challenged and then showed up in a white Undertaker suit (including a 50 Cent style white bra/tank top thingie), just to make sure there was some extra gayness involved. Both of these guys are known for going all out at Wrestlemania and putting on really good matches. I'd expect the same here.

8) Edge (c) vs. The Big Show vs. John Cena - Edge won John Cena's belt. He wanted a rematch. Then Big Show started banging Vicky Guerrero, who I think is Edge's wife (at least girlfriend)... so shit got thick and he got added into the match. Three way matches generally suck in WWE... but John Cena and Edge work really well together so I think this will be decent.

9) Triple H (c) vs. Randy Orton - Orton was offing McMahons (Vince, Shane, then Stephanie)... they then "broke storyline" and revealed that Triple H is married to Stephanie and came to her aid and HHH defended the honor of the McMahons and challenged Orton. Then he came to Orton's house, tried to beat him up with a sledgehammer and threw him through the front window of his house. Triple H was then arrested. As if things couldn't get worse for Trips, Orton handcuffed HHH to the ring ropes, his Stephanie with a DDT, then kissed her. Expect lots of grunting and that awkard face to face staredown thing where it looks like they're gonna kiss.

Enjoy and feel free to make predictions and shit.

[TeddyPicker]

Originally Posted by shoogbear63

It's the one day each year where we mouthbreathers rejoice like it's Christmas.

Mazel Tov!

[NikoBlaze]

haven't watched in years but for some reason i'm gonna check this one out, kinda a blast from the past for me.

[Uncast]

On paper the Jericho vs Legends match seems to be one of the worst ideas in a while but first off I loved Steamboat as a kid and he looks like he can still kick some ass but outside of those already listed as being involved in the match, I'm thinking we get one more "legend" that gets involved...perhaps Dwayne Johnson comes back for one more appearance as "The Rock"? He did mention in a recent interview that he misses the crowds and that he won't be able to watch the event. Perhaps that's because he's going to be a part of it? Planet 51 and Tooth Fairy are done shooting so he's got a bit of free time between films. Just a thought.

[shoogbear63]

Originally Posted by Uncast

On paper the Jericho vs Legends match seems to be one of the worst ideas in a while but first off I loved Steamboat as a kid and he looks like he can still kick some ass but outside of those already listed as being involved in the match, I'm thinking we get one more "legend" that gets involved...perhaps Dwayne Johnson comes back for one more appearance as "The Rock"? He did mention in a recent interview that he misses the crowds and that he won't be able to watch the event. Perhaps that's because he's going to be a part of it? Planet 51 and Tooth Fairy are done shooting so he's got a bit of free time between films. Just a thought.

Agreed about it being horrible on paper. I'm always down for seeing Ricky Steamboat lay an armdrag on someone. I'm kinda home it comes down to him and Jericho, and he surprises everyone by getting in shape and giving us some solid work.

The Rock will never come back to wrestling. Period. There's a reason that he changed his name in movies. He might do little interview spots or show up to promote movies, but we've seen his last wrestling match. I'd love to be wrong here, but it'll never happen.

[DarkKnightJared]

I only really rarely watch at this point, my mom being the big fan. But, we payed fifty bucks for it, so by fuck I'm going to help make it our money's worth.

The Jericho stuff has bothered me a bit too--if not just because from what I've seen, more and more are hating him way more than your average heel. Wasn't he ambushed by a bunch of fans at one point? If he wins, I think we can see some legit rioting.

[shoogbear63]

Originally Posted by DarkKnightJared

I only really rarely watch at this point, my mom being the big fan. But, we payed fifty bucks for it, so by fuck I'm going to help make it our money's worth.

The Jericho stuff has bothered me a bit too--if not just because from what I've seen, more and more are hating him way more than your average heel. Wasn't he ambushed by a bunch of fans at one point? If he wins, I think we can see some legit rioting.

I don't see him putting over wrestlers who aren't active at Wrestlemania. I'm thinking Jericho goes over.

[BrianAlt]

My 10 year old son is really excited and watching now.

[Maiyn]

Originally Posted by shoogbear63

9) Triple H (c) vs. Randy Orton - Orton was offing McMahons (Vince, Shane, then Stephanie)... they then "broke storyline" and revealed that Triple H is married to Stephanie and came to her aid and HHH defended the honor of the McMahons and challenged Orton. Then he came to Orton's house, tried to beat him up with a sledgehammer and threw him through the front window of his house. Triple H was then arrested. As if things couldn't get worse for Trips, Orton handcuffed HHH to the ring ropes, his Stephanie with a DDT, then kissed her. Expect lots of grunting and that awkard face to face staredown thing where it looks like they're gonna kiss.

Enjoy and feel free to make predictions and shit.

What is the current storyline? Last I watched (several years ago, I admit) HHH and stephanie's real life marriage was brought up and they even used it in a couple story lines.

[Daddybones]

I so called Rey's Joker mask on the last episode of our podcast. I'll get this on DVD when it comes out. I did a real sweet interview with Thomas Simpson, co-founder of OMEGA with Matt Hardy back when the Hardy's were trying to get signed to WWE last week as a bonus episode. Check it out: http://www.originalgeekspodcast.com/...tlemania25.mp3