Mushroom Trips

[Venatore]

In this case, literally - I'm considering going on a retreat in Jamaica after reading up on how effective psilocybin can be for treating depression. It's a week-long shindig and costs $3k, but if it lives up to the curative hype it would be worth it (YA GIRL HAS BEEN GOING THROUGH SOME THINGS). Therapy + meds have staved off the worst of my depression but I'm nowhere near happy. Never have been.

I don't drink/smoke/have any fun but I figure that the rest of you degenerate drug addicts could tell me what to expect. Or that this is stupid. Honesty is appreciated either way.

[Enunciated Piffle]

I’m a big fan of psilocybin and even though tripping in a therapeutic setting has become trendy - I can’t imagine dosing with strangers. Not for the first time. But. Maybe if you went with a friend/ family? Maybe the group builds a rapport first..?

I’ve been to Montego Bay. It’s. Fucking. Gorgeous. That ocean water there is a blue you’ve never seen before. It’s amazing - magical even. I’d wanna trip there.

In all my years of crippling depression, the thing that’s really truly helped is daily exercise. Every day jog a mile. Having a routine of going to gym. Depressed folks are lacking serotonin and physical exertion is the only positive/ lasting way I’ve ever managed to keep that stuff in brain supply.

KATG podcast is a nice lil’ serotonin dump. So at least ya got that

Seriously tho. I hope you find your smile. Take care.

[Venatore]

Originally Posted by Enunciated Piffle

I’m a big fan of psilocybin and even though tripping in a therapeutic setting has become trendy - I can’t imagine dosing with strangers. Not for the first time. But. Maybe if you went with a friend/ family? Maybe the group builds a rapport first..?

I’ve been to Montego Bay. It’s. Fucking. Gorgeous. That ocean water there is a blue you’ve never seen before. It’s amazing - magical even. I’d wanna trip there.

In all my years of crippling depression, the thing that’s really truly helped is daily exercise. Every day jog a mile. Having a routine of going to gym. Depressed folks are lacking serotonin and physical exertion is the only positive/ lasting way I’ve ever managed to keep that stuff in brain supply.

KATG podcast is a nice lil’ serotonin dump. So at least ya got that

Seriously tho. I hope you find your smile. Take care.

Thanks so much for the kind words, and for the advice! I've been exercising more recently and will step things up a bit. I did have reservations about the fact that I wouldn't know anyone there, so perhaps I'll hold off and go with like-minded friends in the future if it still feels like it's worth a shot.

[Venatore]

Originally Posted by Lord of the Cock Rings

I agree with EP on this. Couple of points I want to make here.

1. Shrooms, or any other psychedelic, is generally going to amplify whatever your emotional state of being is. Ever hear of a bad trip? That's generally because you have started out in a dark or even just an apprehensive state.
Warm fuzzies can never be guaranteed.

2. Because of the neurotransmitter dump from psychedelics, your brain eventually fatigues from that and the end or downside of teh trip is usually feeling like shit the next day. People become lethargic and emotionless or even uncomfortably introspective. It's not uncommon to have a real swing after the party and get pretty emotionally raw.

3. The studies on treating depression or PTSD with various psychedelics are centered around micro-dosing meaning the therapeutic dose is FAR lower than what people generally use recreationally. It could be 1,000 times lower, that's not an exaggeration. The people that run these party/trip retreats are trippers and partiers, not people with medical backgrounds. Those serious studies use lab synthesized chemicals that can be accurately quantified and free from impurities which is next to impossible using ground up mushrooms or whatever form they give you.

Full disclosure: I used to take a lot of mushrooms and acid. I had some really awesome experiences and some reallly scary ones. I would take acid again if I had confidence in who was producing it but I would never take mushrooms again because I did experience seizures a few times. I was only aware of the seizures the last time I took them and when I told some other friends about it they were like "oh yeah, that happened to you when we were tripping once" (two separate groups of friends)
That's it, I'm done with that shit, I didn't even take a lot the time that I remember seizing.

That is indeed scary, and I'm so sorry you had to deal with such an awful effect. I started reading up on peoples' personal experiences after looking at the (admittedly not final) findings themselves, and both seemed overwhelmingly positive, dosages/frequency notwithstanding.

With regards to amplification of your mental state - I'm in a weird spot, in the sense that I'm better than where I was, but have never had any "breakthrough" to feeling like a happy/motivated/"normal" person. I had hopes that the introspective effects would aid me in resolving the things that were still hindering that, but I may have put blinders up to the idea that it could make things worse.

The sage wisdom is appreciated. I may go just to check out the water, as EP mentioned. I'll hold off on any psychedelic plans for now.

[The Girl]

My biggest thing when I’m on drugs is to remember that I’m on drugs, I’m safe and nothing bad is actually happening. I put myself in an environment where I can feel that way if the “ground” gets shaky.

As for happiness, what do you see happiness as? Curious about what that means to you.


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[Venatore]

Frustratingly, the answer to that is that I don't quite know. It's a gross over-simplification to say "not how I've been feeling," but I don't know who I am underneath depression or what a life unencumbered of this would be like. I try not to idealize the idea/compare it to where I am currently as that will only work to deepen the negativity, but it's tough.

It's a strange metric by which to judge things, but the question I've always asked myself is "If you could do this all again, would you?" The answer up to this point has always been no. I want that to change one day, but at the moment I'm just existing. The retreat in question appealed to me because it seemed to present the key to some door I couldn't get open.

[The Girl]

Thanks for answering. I totally get it. I’ve felt a cloud over my head before. Like even when I was having a good time there was this low-level anxiety or depression in the back. It’s hard to know what happiness is because it’s different for everyone but it’s sold as one concept that seems very one-size-fits-all which is impossible.

How about making a list of the things you like in your life and the things you’d like to be different?


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[Venatore]

Oh, I make that list in my head daily. Finding motivation to act on them, or even knowing where to begin, is the problem. You know how they say a lot of people feel dissatisfaction because of the 'paralax' effect of seeing their lofty goals, but not paying attention to how far they've already traversed? (This may have been dsicussed on the show.) If it's like seeing a mountaintop in the distance but not the miles hiked toward it, then I feel like I'm stuck in a mine underneath the mountain. I can imagine the summits I should be headed for, but a path to them, or a point in even seeking that path, feels out of reach. A map, a flashlight, a hammer and chisel... all would be helpful, haha. Right now I'm fighting rocks with my hands.

You're 100% right about it not having the same meaning for everyone across the board. The most base, quintessential thing for me would be waking up in the morning and subsequently living out my day without questioning what the point of everything was. Actively pushing forward for the sake of it, because the experience of existing feels worth it.

Aaaaand I need to book you for a life coaching session, if only to repay you for reading this novel, lol.

[Z-Corn]

Are you going to the retreat that Shane Mauss is a part of? If so, that one looks legit to me. Not a bunch of partiers but people who seem equipped to help you with your thoughts before and after your experience.


Also, MoBay is a shithole. Get out of there as soon as you can. Get into the country where the people are friendly and more laid back. If you are indeed talking about the retreat Shane is part of it is on the South Coast which is probably the most chill part of the island.

[The Girl]

This might sound cheesy but I list gratitudes in my head for a minute at a time to remind myself that my life is great. I put it in my morning routine. And I also do it when I'm feeling low.