1604: Alienating

[Keith]

A shit shake = Fucking your adopted 10 year old daughter at any age?

My gravy...

As for not performing the Dice impression: I'm a regular Michael Buffer. I don't just "do it." I "perform it." And it just wasn't the time.

We both know when it's time.

[Sorin Markov]

Originally Posted by word

2 things Keith why didnt you do your award winning dice clay impression. Also Chemda's right a shit shake woah

Andrew Dice GaGa..... too funny... also this is a great show, im going to use this one to show to new people, i couldnt stop laughing

[Fourbid]

I don't really see how the two are comparable in terms of severity.

Chemda's point just seems silly to me.

[rodimusprime]

Originally Posted by Keith

I'm telling you, if you knew this guy...

But Woody Allen can say, "I'm telling you, if you knew this girl..."?

C'MON!!!

Here's the thing Keith... Chemda has a point that you being brilliantly hilarious 5 times a week for like 7 years HAS sort of made me biased towards you. So I can't really "prove" that I'm not influenced to be forgiving of your attempted murder.

But you've actually made me realize something today. I think attempted murder isn't actually THAT bad. And it's nowhere near as bad as child rape. There is a line there. I could WORK with a dude who might have been tempted to kill a motherfucker. Hell... haven't we ALL at least thought about it?

But child rape? Nah ... I can't relate to that. It isn't a universal human experience. It's not something you can explain to a normal person. So I guess you're right after all...

But damn... I already voted in the poll. Sorry dude. I fucked up. But I'm a really funny and endearing guy. Please forgive me!

[Keith]

But it's not attempted murder. If I wanted to kill him, it would have happened. I'd shove all his pills down his throat in his sleep.

I just hoped bad things would happened. Maybe he'd stop doing horse tranquilizers knowing how weird he felt the next day. Him dead wouldn't have hurt me in any way, though. That's true. In full disclosure.

[rodimusprime]

Originally Posted by Keith

But it's not attempted murder. If I wanted to kill him, it would have happened. I'd shove all his pills down his throat in his sleep.

I just hoped bad things would happened. Maybe he'd stop doing horse tranquilizers knowing how weird he felt the next day. Him dead wouldn't have hurt me in any way, though. That's true. In full disclosure.

That's a fine line to argue there. I don't know if any court of law would uphold that. Maybe ... involuntary manslaughter? I don't know... either way... I think we agree... not as bad as CHILD rape. So I'm still on your side here.

[Keith]

We're not in a Court of Law. We're in a Court of What's Right.

A Court of Law: Sure, 64 oz. sodas are banned. A court of what's right: c'mon.

[rodimusprime]

Originally Posted by Keith

c'mon.

THIS was the part that convinced me. You're right. Chemda's wrong. The end.

(Please don't be mad Chemda)

[Boozerz]

3 insect bites in a triangle or in a row are how Bed Bug bites usually show up. So maybe not an Alien, probably just another case of New York Bed Bugs....

[dannyhatch]

I honestly do think there's a difference. What Keith did—horrible as it may have been—was to an adult, while Woody Allen, Roman Polanski and Michael Jackson abused children. Keith's roommate was a grown man who could have defended himself (and did, it sounds like, by not drinking all of the orange juice.) The nine-year old girl Polanski raped not only did nothing to deserve it but also had no way of defending herself.

Now, attempted murder is certainly awful and whether Keith was right or not is another story. I'm sure even Keith thinks he may have been in the wrong on that one. But it's absolutely not on the same level as taking sexual advantage of children like Misters Allen, Polanski and Jackson are guilty of.