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View Poll Results: Have you ever been arrested?
Yes 21 26.25%
No 59 73.75%
Voters: 80. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 03-30-2017, 07:57 AM   #141 (permalink)
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i really don't see the point in invalidating Chemda
Where have I done that?
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Old 03-30-2017, 10:02 AM   #142 (permalink)
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in matters of style, not substance sometimes. please forgive me if this sounds critical, i don't mean it to be, i'm just looking from the outside:

an example might be in the timing of a solution-based policy approach during the original conversation with Chemda. you like to come at things within a logical framework in a cool rational space; which is fine because that's how you do you and it's a fine way to talk about such things. in that moment Chemda could not meet you in that space, but you insisted she put that square peg she was currently inside through this round hole. it's not that there was disagreement, it's just nobody was getting what they needed out of the conversation b/c you insisted there was only the round hole to use. yes, round hole, but also, ya know, square.

other times might be excluding or reducing the human elements surrounding policy. it's like, yes, the front side of the barn is important what with the doors and all, but that don't mean the beams ain't holding it up.
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Old 03-30-2017, 10:31 AM   #143 (permalink)
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you insisted she put that square peg she was currently inside through this round hole. it's not that there was disagreement, it's just nobody was getting what they needed out of the conversation b/c you insisted there was only the round hole to use. yes, round hole, but also, ya know, square.
I hear you. I have a hard time understanding the point of a conversation, if we're not going to try and solve something. I get that there's a point to venting and other expressions, I just have a hard time being in that mindset.
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Old 03-30-2017, 10:50 AM   #144 (permalink)
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and that's our Michael! truly, allow me to affirm that it's not a negative trait. there's a place for that and it's a lot of fun for me sometimes to extend as much as i'm able to play on that logic jungle gym with you. ya know, so long as i can yell real loud.
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Old 03-31-2017, 12:42 PM   #145 (permalink)
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Chemda I am so sorry you had that experience.

Canadian here. I was one of the people who voted yes. I was arrested once for shoplifting. The store security lady who caught me treated me like garbage. I asked her things and she just ignored me like I wasn't even there. When she did look at me it was like she was looking at something stuck to her shoe. She also wrote 3 pages about the incident.

I stole $6 worth of food at the grocery store. I'm not saying it wasn't wrong. I know it was. But I'd had surgery, and it was botched so I had to have another surgery and I'd just gotten home and on pain killers. I literally had no food and it was 5 days before I was getting any more money. I had a little money so I bought some stuff and put a couple of things in my bag. I know it was wrong. I just didn't have enough money and I was desperate.

Now, my experience with the cops was completely different. There was one cop who came to arrest me for it (I guess, I might not be using the right terms at times here) he was SO kind. She still wasn't acknowledging me when he arrived but he was. He explained everything to me. I didn't have ID on me so he brought me home. He didn't handcuff me or anything and he walked out of the store behind me, he didn't make it obvious I was with him. He drove me home and came in and actually talked to me. Like he said, what happened? And I told him and he told me it was OK. I started crying and he got me a glass of water. He was here 20 minutes. He explained the whole process of what I had to do, I had a date where I had to go and get fingerprinted and photographed and a court date. He said if I couldn't make it I had to call at least 24 hours in advance.

When I went to the place to get fingerprinted, the lady was also very kind. She told me this wouldn't affect me in a job search and said she hoped things got better for me.

Then when I went to court I saw the lawyer for a minute, explained what happened, and waited to see the judge. The judge just accepted the guilty verdict and I didn't get a fine. I was petrified while waiting because other people were there for shoplifting and some of them were getting $200 fines. I wouldn't be able to pay that. Luckily I didn't get a fine.

I do think about how much money my $6 theft cost "the system".

I know I was VERY VERY lucky all along the way. I don't know what would happen if I was treated in any of the ways Chemda was treated.

(The cops here aren't perfect by any means, but it's not like in the US.)
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Old 04-03-2017, 09:57 AM   #146 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by bellalugosi View Post
Chemda I am so sorry you had that experience.

Canadian here. I was one of the people who voted yes. I was arrested once for shoplifting.

(The cops here aren't perfect by any means, but it's not like in the US.)
Which part of Canada did this happen? My impression is certain parts of Canada are more conservative than others. Do you think this treatment is the same throughout Canada or just the area you live in?
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Old 04-03-2017, 03:23 PM   #147 (permalink)
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The Avalon Peninsula of Newfoundland, Canada. When I said here I wasn't clear, I did mean, here, in my area. I know it's not the same everywhere. I only mention being Canada because the laws of what the cops should do may slightly differ. I only know of the experiences I have had and people I know have had. And what's in the news of course. Recently we had one police shooting, no charges laid. There's an inquiry ongoing. And we just had a cop acquitted of rape, while on duty, and he clearly was guilty.

I know it's not the same throughout Canada (google Highway of Tears) or even throughout the rest of this province. But I do feel safe. I wouldn't be afraid to call them if I needed them. I acknowledge that someone in Toronto for example might have a completely different experience. I feel very lucky to live where I live and have had the experience I did.
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