649: Dead Funny

[andsoitgoes]

Originally Posted by matt B

you are still a huge douche with douche kids....

Okay. I have had held my tongue, but the flames on this are just too big.

First, I'm a dad, I've got 2 kids, twins. They're 3. I've been doing this 3 years. That's my part in explanation of my "experience"

I'm not sure what MG has said in the past or, as Spooky said, win arguments in the bar.

I do know that his kids are not on here, controlling what he says. They don't type for him. MG may be the most giant douchebag on the planet, maybe he is. But this itsy bitty thing is NOT about him.

MattB - You are probably one of my favorite people on the show, and you commenting on MG telling people who don't have kids that they're wrong is one thing. I have my own thoughts on that, which I'll mention - because I'm on a rant now, but you DO NOT have the right to call his children douches. Not in this context, not ever. Call the man a fuckwit, call him an cunt sore, call him whatever you want, but until his children are on this forum posting - please for the love of god leave them OUT. I don't care what he's said about parenting, and maybe his kids are - but you don't have the right or the place to say it. I still love you man, but jesus, that was a blow you didn't need to take.

NOW - As for people telling others how to raise their children when they don't have kids..... *deep breath* Well, I haven't gotten into the discussion simply because it's hard enough with people who HAVE children to understand that every single child is different. The environment is different, the people raising them are different.

MOST of what I have heard, not ALL, but most centers around a blanket assumption of how kids should be raised, and how they should act.

I say this because my sister, who has a child with high-functioning autism, used to be instructed on how her child should act. They made a fucking assumption that he should be just like every other child, because that's all they know. They see a kid who for the most part functions normally, so they expect that regardless of what is going on with him, he should be "just like other kids". This is with people that HAVE kids.

Maybe a large portion of the population is able to do the standard, suggested tips to parenting. A LOT of parents have easy going children that fit the "Mold" that everone expects children to have. Maybe they listen and are GREAT, they never break anything and they treat the world like it's all beautiful and wonderful. Or maybe they're just a bit defiant, but "standard" discipline works for them. These parents expect that in these cases, ALL children should be able to succeed by these rules.

Guess what, they don't. And honestly, parents giving advice about raising a child is GENERALLY worse than the advice from those that don't. They have a comparison, and they assume it should be a blanket comparison, FOR THE MOST PART, not all parents are this way.

I had a lot of friends, with and without kids, INSIST that I should do such and such with my children when they were having problems sleeping. They said "Let them cry it out, just let them" - Guess what, that doesn't work with my kids. It hasn't since they were born and in intensive care.

And guess what else? MOST of these people that gave me the advice either had NO children, or only 1. Guess what, having twins changes the fucking game. Because guess what happens if one actually DOES fall asleep, the other wakes them up. Even if we did move them, there are far more challenges there. OR, in my case, they simply don't fall asleep. We tried it, once, and it was an entire disaster, and *I* believe it set their development back because especially at an EARLY age, all they have is trust in the people who surround them, and forcing their hand into a position that they are not emotionally ready for.

This is for my children, and it doesn't apply to everyone. It doesn't apply to my friends whose children, at a given time, say "Goodnight, I'm going to bed now" and walk themselves to their bedroom or, after a short story, roll over and go to bed. That's the "norm" and doesn't fit every mold.

Now, I'm NOT saying my children are gifted - I am not in the assumption that they are, however I have read a shitload of articles by people that have examined a LOT of children from different situations and being non-standard, having massive emotional highs and lows - can mean these children MAY be gifted, or just on a different track developmentally.

I DIGRESS. Almost everyone, with or without kids, assumes they have the experience behind them to not just give advice, but pass judgement on others. That is where I have an issue.

Fuck, I don't even know where I was going with this, but I don't think anyone with or WITHOUT children should, without being asked, or without that person posting, opening up their child rearing theories, should keep their opinions to themselves. If I was to say "This is how you should raise your child, you should be doing this and this and this", I'm all open for discussion.

And if you've been party to something you think is crazy that you've seen, I know Keith and Chemda discussed this in an episode, talk about it - but realize that you can end up sounding ignorant if you critique based on the actions you saw.

Why? You don't see what things are like at home, you don't know what the family is going through at THAT moment. Maybe they don't deal as well in public, and are completely different when there aren't a drastic number of people around them. Maybe they're not... But still, you're taking a miasma of actions and expounding on that with huge assumptions.

I had some dickwad the other day when I was waiting in line, for too damn long, at the store because they fucked up my order. I had my kids with me. They were messing around with things and had pulled something insignificant down. This 80 year old man with no idea how to use deoderant scoffed and decided he would give his 2 cents that this isn't how children should act.

I tried to be civil and explain that they are inquisitive, and are damn impatient waiting in line, and are JUST THREE YEARS OLD - but he decided to say that his grandchildren never acted like this.

I then proceeded to tell him that my children are not his grandchildren, that I was thankful they weren't and that maybe he needs to learn about some extra strenght deoderant.

Right behind him was a mom who had twins, who was smiling at my girls the entire time, and looked at me, said "They are interested in everything, it's GREAT, isn't it? This is such a great age" - so while old fuckwad thought they were the bane of existence, someone who had a similiar situation had a different perspective. But even in that case, what worked for her wouldn't necessarily work for what I have on my hands.

So, for anyone that has read this far, well... you have too damn much time on your hands.

The morale is this:

Regardless of whether you have kids, or don't have kids, you making a broad, unsupported judgement on someone else and how they raise their children just makes you sound ignorant. You're entitled to your opinion, but at least for me, and a lot of others, it just comes across as not being able to put your shoes in the person you're judging.

[matt B]

i appreciate the praise and criticism...

keeping your opinion to yourself i agree with generally
in the street or when involved with most matters that dont affect you...

however this is the antithesis of the point of a public forum especially one with such interesting characters as this

also for all parents not wanting their kids mentioned..stop mentioning them
we wouldnt even know if you had them if you didnt bring them up

and maybe this goes for uninteresting adults who talk about their kids constantly as well in public...shut up we dont care if johnny won the school race or has a runny nose again go tell another parent
david cross has a funny routine about this

i trust that some of you parents are sacrificing a lot for your children you are noble to do so

that gives you no more right than me to say what can and cannot be brought up on a forum with a porn thread... need i say more parent...

quit mentioning your kids..we'll forget you have them...or dont whine when we use them to insult you...i dont believe in pulling punches during insults... i have my line i know when i cross it and its probably different than yours

till then fuck yourselves and quit whining..and for those of you who have kids and havent made it public on these forums...applause to you...you keep your kids out of your business when you dont want them brought up

[andsoitgoes]

I'm not saying keep your opinion to yourself.

I'm saying don't call someone's kid a douchebag. That's a low blow, and Matt, you're a fucking smart guy that doesn't need to go there. You have an arsenal of intelligence that can knock a man down, but to hit someone's kids, that just not cool. Are you so low that if someone mentioned their mothers death, you'd use that if you thought they were an asshole?

Again, you're better than that, and I say that because I have respect and much love for you.

I've never mentioned my kids prior to this thead. the reason I mentioned them here was in response to people giving parenting criticism (I've never seen "advice" here. Only criticism). If you're going to tell people to keep their kids out of it, then don't talk about parenting without accepting that people will bring up their kids.

And yeah, there's a porn thread here, and I jerk off, regularly, but this isn't the hustler or penthouse forums, for me this is really one of the only forums I post in, and I think it's a a more open and welcoming venue to discuss life than drunkenstepfather or xbox.com

MG, as seen by him posting here when his daughter was born, and from his > 11,000 posts tells me that he feels this place is a second home and generally filled with friends.

As for the David Cross reference, that's one of my fav bits of his, because before I had kids, and now that I do, it's the most god damn annoying thing people do. If you're my friend and you care about what my kid is doing, you'll know.

But if I give 2 fucks about you, I give less for your kids. Hell, even if you are my friend, if I don't ask, I don't care. The same goes in reverse, I don't feel this need to share when my kids first took a crap in the toilet, or when they started to walk.

Anyway, Matt, you're awesome, but my original point stands that I think it was a low and unneccessary blow to call mgs kids douches.

And I'd like to remind everyone that this whole slew of drama started when MG said "If I can't download it, stop talking about it."

What a fucking procession from the above to your kids are douches.

Originally Posted by matt B

i appreciate the praise and criticism...

keeping your opinion to yourself i agree with generally
in the street or when involved with most matters that dont affect you...

however this is the antithesis of the point of a public forum especially one with such interesting characters as this

also for all parents not wanting their kids mentioned..stop mentioning them
we wouldnt even know if you had them if you didnt bring them up

and maybe this goes for uninteresting adults who talk about their kids constantly as well in public...shut up we dont care if johnny won the school race or has a runny nose again go tell another parent
david cross has a funny routine about this

i trust that some of you parents are sacrificing a lot for your children you are noble to do so

that gives you no more right than me to say what can and cannot be brought up on a forum with a porn thread... need i say more parent...

quit mentioning your kids..we'll forget you have them...or dont whine when we use them to insult you...i dont believe in pulling punches during insults... i have my line i know when i cross it and its probably different than yours

till then fuck yourselves and quit whining..and for those of you who have kids and havent made it public on these forums...applause to you...you keep your kids out of your business when you dont want them brought up

[Melvin]

cameras have a lot to answer for

[cinnamon]

Originally Posted by MichaelApproved

I was going to quote a bunch of people and thank them but there were so many nice posts. Talking about something like this can be hard. It helped knowing I was doing it to a great fan base. I am very happy I failed at the attempt. I've gotten over a lot of my issues and have found ways to deal with most of the the ones I haven't yet.

Chemda Rocks!

I wanted to say two simple words to you Michael....Thank you. That was a particularly hard show to listen to (especially sitting at work) because it brought up a lot of hard/horrible memories that I worked so hard to suppress. I realize now that I must deal with it in order to move on. I applaud you for your courage on talking to such a mass of people on something so difficult. Maybe one day I'll have the balls to finally be able to say the words out loud that 'I tried to commit suicide'.

Thanks.

[andsoitgoes]

Originally Posted by Ucee

That one deserves a smack on the head for stupidity

I KNOW!!!

Fuck, it's YOUR, not YOURE.

[OSLIN]

Glad you are still here, Michael...you're so fun to listen to.

[Ana]

Michael, Chemda does rock doesn't she You are a very lucky man to have support from such an awesome sister!

You guys help the 'insides' of people... yes Keet even you with your jokes, uplifting everyone when it got a little to hard to keep tears down.

Thankyou for sharing this side of the Keet and the Girl world

[spon]

Originally Posted by bbrad2

What a great show, but with all the seriousness I have to say that the 21 Jump Street visual with Keith just killed me. So I made this. Mad props to Keith for sharing this story. Image is on Flicker here>>

Do you think that Richard Greco's sits in his basement at night and throws darts at Johnny Depp's face on a dartboard?

[Blank Mondragon]

I loved this show specially because Michael mentioned my favorite programming language: Logo.

He confused the turtle with a frog, but what the heck.

Who would have thought, KATG and Logo finally united. It's like a dream come true.... sigh