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Old 07-03-2008, 01:27 AM   #1 (permalink)
PARTY! SUPER PARTY!
 
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758: Head of the Class

"Fuck you, England. I didn't forget."


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Old 07-03-2008, 06:38 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Come over here and say that...
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Old 07-03-2008, 06:42 AM   #3 (permalink)
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The story of the baby who got his head smashed by forceps is kind of similar to what happened to me when I was born. I was pretty big (over 10 lbs.) and the doctors used forceps to help deliver me. They dislocated my shoulder, sliced open the back of my head (which resulted in a staph infection) and the delivery took so long that when I finally came out I had an APGAR score of one, which basically means I was blue, not breathing, and unresponsive. They didn't have any oxygen in the room, but by the time they got some I had started breathing on my own. The doctors told my parents that I would probably have brain damage and my right arm would be paralyzed. My mom said my arm was ok within 2 weeks and I could talk in complete sentences by the time I was a year old. Fucking doctors.
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Old 07-03-2008, 07:00 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by JamIsNotGlue View Post
The story of the baby who got his head smashed by forceps is kind of similar to what happened to me when I was born. I was pretty big (over 10 lbs.) and the doctors used forceps to help deliver me. They dislocated my shoulder, sliced open the back of my head (which resulted in a staph infection) and the delivery took so long that when I finally came out I had an APGAR score of one, which basically means I was blue, not breathing, and unresponsive. They didn't have any oxygen in the room, but by the time they got some I had started breathing on my own. The doctors told my parents that I would probably have brain damage and my right arm would be paralyzed. My mom said my arm was ok within 2 weeks and I could talk in complete sentences by the time I was a year old. Fucking doctors.
Glad you survived. Make sure you don't use doctors again though - they nearly killed you and probably on purpose.
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Old 07-03-2008, 07:02 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Come over here and say that...
He is in October. Good to see you just RSVP'd.
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Old 07-03-2008, 07:08 AM   #6 (permalink)
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He is in October. Good to see you just RSVP'd.
Yeah I know, and Doug Stanhope is over in September, its going to be a good year.
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Old 07-03-2008, 07:10 AM   #7 (permalink)
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He is in October. Good to see you just RSVP'd.
I can't wait for October. It's going to be like when Jay-Z came to headline Glastonbury - except I actually give a shit about Keith and Chemda.
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Old 07-03-2008, 09:16 AM   #8 (permalink)
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One of my kids was a forceps delivery. She was turned, and stuck partway through the process. And no, Chemda, there was no way to "open the thing". As it was, she came out and had to go on a respirator, and without the forceps, might not have made it at all. The process caused some slight damage to one eye, but it was a small issue in comparison to what might have been. Like anything, it's the person doing the procedure, not the procedure itself, that's the greatest danger. In our case, the doctor earned all the thanks we could give him.
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:34 AM   #9 (permalink)
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One of my kids was a forceps delivery. She was turned, and stuck partway through the process. And no, Chemda, there was no way to "open the thing". As it was, she came out and had to go on a respirator, and without the forceps, might not have made it at all. The process caused some slight damage to one eye, but it was a small issue in comparison to what might have been. Like anything, it's the person doing the procedure, not the procedure itself, that's the greatest danger. In our case, the doctor earned all the thanks we could give him.
Fairly certain you could of had an emergency c-section
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:51 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Dimitri phonecall videos

Part 1
http://youtube.com/watch?v=dZ83use8YE8


Part 2
http://youtube.com/watch?v=j7epDIrJImU
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