Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
Check out the recent shows
Click here to get Keith and The Girl free on iTunes.
Click here to get the podcast RSS feed. Click here to watch all the videos on our YouTube channel. |
![]() |
#1 (permalink) |
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 85
|
Bums in the Basement
Yesterday I was relaxing watching some tv and having a brew when there is a knock at the door. I stand up, put some trousers/pants on and answer the door. Its the police and they start to tell me that they have been called because a neighbour of mine (I live in a block of flats/apartment complex) wash going down to the basement and found that someone had been living there. So I go downstairs to have a look to see if anythings missing or if theres any damage. Now when I said they had been living there I MEAN LIVING. There was a table, a bed thing, glasses, a FUCKING FRIDGE and shit loads of strong beer. As bewildered as I was I started to think how they got in. No sign of forced entry so one of them must have had a key. So I open the back door which leads into the garden and as I look down I see a collosal shit. Yes thats human shit!! And then I saw that he had stepped in it and there was shit footprints leading like a trail to his lair. So I basically threw most of his shit outside by the trash closed the door and went upstairs and looked out of my kitchen window waiting for them to come back.
Several hours pass and I hear a commotion downstairs, so I run to the basement and find one of my neighbours talking to a stinky drunk man. Apparently he had been renting out a room without my knowledge in the basement where this vagrant could keep his belongings. And thats how he got in and decided to nest. My neighbour doesnt want to throw his stuff out, because he says he is such a nice man when he is sober. I DONT GIVE A FUCK IF HE HOLDS THE CURE FOR CANCER. THE FUCKER TOOK A SHIT OUTSIDE MY HOUSE!!!! So what do I do? 1. Break open the door to where his stuff is kept take it all to the garden and set it on fire? 2. "Force" my neighbour to give me 3 months back rent for the room he was illegaly renting that bum? 3. Both? ![]() Picture I took of him standing next to his stuff. It started to piss down with rain about 2 minutes later. ![]() ![]() ![]()
__________________
yada yada yada yada ................ "Who the fuck is Dave?" |
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
#3 (permalink) | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,265
|
fuck. i hate people for shit like this. you cant save everyone. you cant just turn your head and look the other way, the cops and a neighbor know about it. Homeless people are homeless for a reason, more often than not, so i wonder about the safety of people that are nearby. now, it falls on your shoulders to do something.
charge the three months rent, something cheap, for lack of facilities, $50 bucks a month maybe, and give it to the homeless man. and hope he doesnt sue for squatters rights or some shit like that. hopefully, your flatmate will learn not to pull that shit, and the homeless guy, who is very likely now in a worse situation than if he were left to his own devices from the beginning, might be able to hang out at a fast food joint if it rains with some cash in his pocket. though, its almost a certainty it will be spent on liquor. its a fucking shame, people dont fucking know what help is. people want to be noble, and end up hurting everyone. fucking retards still dont grasp that teach a man to fish phrase. assholes. that fucking picture ruined my day, a man was given something, long enough to depend on it, and it was taken away from him. your buddy hurt him, and that picture is an illustration of how much. when its all done, kick your buddy's ass and rub his face in some shit and say "NO!!!" he has it coming.
__________________
Quote:
|
|
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
#4 (permalink) |
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Halifax NS
Posts: 343
|
Geez Spooky I thought you'd tell him to make a treasure map for the homeless guy to find his stuff in the next town over.
And how long would it take to get rid of the smell in your basement? |
(Offline) |
![]() |
Keith and The Girl is a free comedy talk show and podcast
Check out the recent shows
Click here to get Keith and The Girl free on iTunes.
Click here to get the podcast RSS feed. Click here to watch all the videos on our YouTube channel. |
![]() |
#5 (permalink) | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,265
|
Quote:
|
|
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
#6 (permalink) | |
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 85
|
Quote:
|
|
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
#8 (permalink) | |
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Halifax NS
Posts: 343
|
Quote:
True that but what if he wanted to keep him as a pet? |
|
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
#10 (permalink) | |
Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 1
|
Quote:
|
|
(Offline) |
![]() |
![]() |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|