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Old 06-24-2010, 09:22 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Do you think you'd be a good parent?

This question is for those without kids.
I've always thought I'd be a good parent if I ever chose to have kids. After seeing a real parent in action at the grocery store I'm not so sure now.

26-28ish mom, 2 and 3 year olds. Kids were standing in the aisle while she was checking out. Mom, "What the fuck you doin? Get the fuck over here both of you. Wit yo stupid little fuckin asses." She then grabbed them and yanked them in line.

I'd have never thought to do this, but analyzing it on the way home I've come to the conclusion she's actually quite good.

She asked them to explain themselves.
"What the fuck you doin?"

She stated her expectations.
"Get the fuck back over here, both of you."

Identified the issue.
"Yo stupid little fuckin' asses."

Then corrected them.
Yanking them in line.

Good thing I don't have kids. There's so much to learn.
Anyone want to play guess the race?
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:34 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I think I will be a good parent, but I just don't really want to do it. Expensive, sticky and loud.

I will pass.
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:39 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Yeah.
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:55 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I'm sure my aborted fetuses would thank me, if their little mouths had developed enough to form words.

Last edited by aunt_helen; 06-24-2010 at 10:43 PM.
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Old 06-24-2010, 10:15 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by madeyeshawn View Post
I think I will be a good parent, but I just don't really want to do it. Expensive, sticky and loud.

I will pass.
This...

Little savages.
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Old 06-24-2010, 11:22 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by madeyeshawn View Post
I think I will be a good parent, but I just don't really want to do it. Expensive, sticky and loud.

I will pass.
This.
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Old 06-24-2010, 11:33 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Revese Psycology

I think Ive cracked this whole parenting thing, my brilliant plan is to ENCOURAGE smoking, drugs, and alcohol.

See, eliminate the rebellion part and it will kill the fun of it.

My dad never got on me about drinking or any of that stuff (if your gonna drink just sleep in your car) and I never really got into heavy stuff. (Ill have a drink at a party not to be an asshole but thats about it.)
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Old 06-24-2010, 11:41 PM   #8 (permalink)
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wait sticky are you talkingbefore or after conception
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Old 06-25-2010, 01:53 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I would be such a bummer of a mom. I'd resent the commitment. I just finished a blog post encouraging my two favorite abominations: gays and abortions. Accidentally wrote "gays and blondes" at first there. I would never abort a baby just because it's blonde...

I don't know. Imagine THAT ^ parenting a fucking child and ever changing a diaper without weeping openly. I'm already out of control.

My new slogan: "I wear a mangled clothes hanger around my thigh like a garter belt just in case. Just in case I get a gay one." So the fundamentalists don't throw blood at me on my way out of the clinic.
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Old 06-25-2010, 03:40 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Without a doubt.

I would be an awesome mother.
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