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Old 12-17-2007, 12:26 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Funny Craigs List Post

To the Drunk Hottie who fell off my motorcycle

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2007-11-07, 5:23AM PST


I met you at the bar last night, and we hit it off. Ya we were both a little buzzed, but you seemed as into me as I was into you. Things got to things, we made out a bit, and you ended up going home with me on the back of my motorcycle, which was awesome because that doesn't usually happen to me. I luckily had the extra helmet with me and let you wear my bike jacket while suffering the cold on the way home. I was feeling pretty happy and lucky to say the least.

This is where things got crazy.

I don't know if you slipped, or thought I was taking you home to kill you, or if your're just plain crazy and had a change of heart, but all of a sudden you let go of me MID-TURN and went flying into the bushes at about 10-15mph near the park by my house. I was so freaked out!!! when I looked back to see you fumbling in the bushes I could only PRAY TO GOD that you didn't hit the asphalt or something worse.

I really thought you must have been hurt at least a bit, but as I turned around to come check on you, you took off into the unlit park running full speed with my helmet and jacket still on! I parked my bike and looked for you for over 2 hours calling your name until I was so cold I had to go home or risk freezing to death.

WTF

Im sorry for what happened and I really hope your're ok, really I do, but seriously WTF. Running into a forested park in the middle of the night like that....I really can't begin to guess what you were thinking, and you weren't that drunk, but i suppose my "crazy-bitch o' meter" wasn't working at the bar that night, and from the speed you took off I can only surmise that your're not that hurt. I would like my expensive bike gear back though, I hope it kept you warm during your psychotic episode, but it IS mine and I kinda need it to get around in the winter. If you could return it to the bar for me, check in with your shrink, and promise to never come near me again that would be great, cause you scared the #*$% outta me and are costing me alot of money.

Sincerely,
Very cold/poor motorcycle rider who will never let women near his bike again.


Location: Seattle
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:37 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lebowski View Post
To the Drunk Hottie who fell off my motorcycle

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2007-11-07, 5:23AM PST


I met you at the bar last night, and we hit it off. Ya we were both a little buzzed, but you seemed as into me as I was into you. Things got to things, we made out a bit, and you ended up going home with me on the back of my motorcycle, which was awesome because that doesn't usually happen to me. I luckily had the extra helmet with me and let you wear my bike jacket while suffering the cold on the way home. I was feeling pretty happy and lucky to say the least.

This is where things got crazy.

I don't know if you slipped, or thought I was taking you home to kill you, or if your're just plain crazy and had a change of heart, but all of a sudden you let go of me MID-TURN and went flying into the bushes at about 10-15mph near the park by my house. I was so freaked out!!! when I looked back to see you fumbling in the bushes I could only PRAY TO GOD that you didn't hit the asphalt or something worse.

I really thought you must have been hurt at least a bit, but as I turned around to come check on you, you took off into the unlit park running full speed with my helmet and jacket still on! I parked my bike and looked for you for over 2 hours calling your name until I was so cold I had to go home or risk freezing to death.

WTF

Im sorry for what happened and I really hope your're ok, really I do, but seriously WTF. Running into a forested park in the middle of the night like that....I really can't begin to guess what you were thinking, and you weren't that drunk, but i suppose my "crazy-bitch o' meter" wasn't working at the bar that night, and from the speed you took off I can only surmise that your're not that hurt. I would like my expensive bike gear back though, I hope it kept you warm during your psychotic episode, but it IS mine and I kinda need it to get around in the winter. If you could return it to the bar for me, check in with your shrink, and promise to never come near me again that would be great, cause you scared the #*$% outta me and are costing me alot of money.

Sincerely,
Very cold/poor motorcycle rider who will never let women near his bike again.


Location: Seattle
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests





HAHAHAHAHA!
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:38 PM   #3 (permalink)
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LOLZ! That sounds like a date night in KATG land!
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:41 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Wow, does he really think this will get her attention? If I were this woman and read this I would so think, "weirdo". LOL
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
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OMG I hearts Missed Connections.

There's a local guy who posts every time he sees a girl in a cast. Weirdo fetish
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Old 12-17-2007, 12:59 PM   #6 (permalink)
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OMG I hearts Missed Connections.

There's a local guy who posts every time he sees a girl in a cast. Weirdo fetish
Me too!



That is so weird..
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Old 12-17-2007, 01:05 PM   #7 (permalink)
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this one has to be fake..




Pissed off girl that won my <3 - m4w - 41

Date: 2007-12-16, 9:39PM EST


Hi. I was a little bit drunk that one night when I came into the Dunkin Donuts on Woodward in Ferndale and ordered 13 eclaires. You told me I was drunk and asked me politely to leave; I called you fat and then asked you to have sex with me.

You told me "no way in hell" (or something like that, i was fairly inebriated at the time) so i threw up on you, and you threatened to call the police and then I peed my pants.

Anyway my friends dragged me out of there. I was just wondering if you wanted to go out sometime, other than the fat thing I think you were pretty cute but I can't remember (i was pretty drunk). I'm pretty desperate though, and I'm fairly confident you're single too...I mean, come on.


Thanks!

- Joe
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Old 12-17-2007, 01:10 PM   #8 (permalink)
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You delievered my Pizza - m4m - 45
Date: 2007-12-10, 5:26PM EST


....You're a hot pizza delivery guy who delivered my pizza around 5 p.m. today. I would like some of your extra pepperoni.
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Old 12-17-2007, 01:32 PM   #9 (permalink)
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You and Your 70's Porn Bush Beard - w4m - 26

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: pers-499897977@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-12-05, 4:22PM CST


I miss that filthy gross beard of yours. You keep trimming it away; keeping it from resembling a 70's porn star's vag region.

If only you knew how badly I want you to grow your beard out again.

I want your face beard to make out with my crotch beard.
I don't want to be too specific about things because I'm afraid you may not feel the same!!


hahahahaha
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Old 12-17-2007, 01:58 PM   #10 (permalink)
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/me haz beard
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